What's too painful to remember, we choose to forget
by WILLSONN LOVER
Summary: I wanted to explore what could have happened if Will had gotten his memory back when Ben strangled him... again. Of course Will wasn't feeling very forth coming with that information. This story follows the show to an extent but as the writer I chose to ignore plot points that I did not like. Come along on this journey with me if you like. This is a #Horita story. Enjoy!
1. Chapter 1

_So forgive me for going backwards. Sometimes you have to go back to move forward._

Three weeks back in this town, the one that was supposed to feel like home, but didn't. Maybe it was because everyone kept pushing, trying hard to bully him into remembering. Everyone except for that shrink lady, the one that said she was his grandma. He could see himself loving her, being comfortable with her. And that one guy, Paul, he seemed to take everything in stride. It was like it didn't matter to him if Will ever remembered his old life or not. Those were the only two people Will liked spending time with. Not that Paul wanted to spend any time with him. He had been distinctly giving him the cold shoulder.

That one lady that called herself Sami, she was the worst. She was relentless. Didn't she understand that her constant need to touch him, coupled with her determination that he was going to at least remember her…. Like she was the most important person involved here… wouldn't that be the daughter that he couldn't remember, was driving him crazy, he constantly feel like he was being suffocated or smothered.

And then there was Sonny, the man he married, so at least at one point in his life he loved him, enough to stand in front of all of his friends and family and promise to love him forever. He kept plying him with photographs and memories, pushing him to acknowledge that they had feelings for one another. Whatever those feelings were, he couldn't remember them now.

He walked through the square alone, looking for anything that felt familiar, there was nothing. He kicked at a few loose pebbles with the toe of his shoe. It was frustrating, everyone wanting him to be someone else. Until three weeks ago, he had known who he was, or so he thought. The name had been a lie, his family had been a lie, everything about it...except for who he was deep down. Maybe on some deep subconscious level he had known he was living a lie.

Someone plowed into him from behind. Just as he was about to wheel around and ask the loser what their problem was, a black mesh bag was jerked over his head and he was grabbed and hauled off. He thrashed to and fro trying to escape, eventually getting knocked out in the struggle.

When he came to he was lying on a couch in a dark room that he didn't recognize. He got a strong feeling that maybe he should, but he didn't. He sat up and looked around the room carefully. Still nothing came to him. He touched the back of his head gingerly, it hurt like hell and a knot had formed back there. What the hell was going on.

He got up and went to the door. He was reaching for the knob when he hairs on the back of his neck stood up. That's when he realized he wasn't alone. He slowly turned around.

"Hello Will." the stranger said. "Long time, no see."

"Who are you?" Will said, "Wait do I know you?" He took a few steps toward him.

"Will, you don't remember me?" he said. "That really hurts."

Will moved even closer, trying to get a better look in the dim light of the room. He had seen this man somewhere…. Someone had shown him a picture of him, what had they said about him? He couldn't remember. So many things had been thrown at him recently, he couldn't keep it all straight.

"Will… come on, you spent the last minutes of your old life with me." he said, reaching behind him and pulling a neck tie from his back pocket. He held it up for Will to examine. " Remember me now?" he asked.

"Oh god." Will whispered, "They said you were locked up, how did you get out? What do you want with me? Why are you doing this?" he said tossing out question after question. The answers didn't matter. The reality was that they weren't going to make one damned bit of difference.

"You shouldn't have come back here Will." he said twisting the tie around his hands. He took a menacing step towards Will. "You really should have stayed away."

Will backed away, "Ben, that's your name right? You don't have to do this." he said, reaching blindly behind him, searching for the door, thinking that if he could just find the door, he could get away. This maniac wouldn't chase him out of the apartment right?

"But I do Will…" he said, coming closer. " You should have just stayed one would have ever known." He lunged that last few feet and deftly wrapped the tie around Will's neck, he tugged Will to him tightening his grip.

That spurred Will into action. He struggled to get away. Fighting against Ben, twisting wildly trying to break his hold. The other man was stronger than him and all of his struggles got him was flat on his back on the floor, the tie squeezing his neck.

He was finding it hard to breathe, his lungs burned from lack of oxygen. He was still struggling feebly. Pushing against the man that had somehow crouched over his chest. The fight was quickly draining out of him, every breath increasing harder to draw.

Everything around him was becoming dim, turning black. He felt as if he were floating, as if he were weightless. His arms dropped beside him, he no longer had the strength to move, let alone fight.

Flashes of light in his mind, little things at first and then visions of the past flowing over him like water, threatening to drown him.… his dad holding him over his head grinning up at him, "Look at you Will, You're and airplane." he said, flying him around the room then pulling him down and cuddling him close. His mom walking him into school for the first time. "This is it Will, No crying now… remember you have to be a big boy. You are going to have so much fun here." she said kissing his check. "I will see you after school." She turned and discreetly wiped away her own tears. He knew that she thought he hadn't hadn't seen, but he had.

Gabi, he had loved her, she had been his girlfriend for a long time. He was comfortable with her, until she started pressing for things he didn't want to give. She always wanted to go places alone, he was comfortable around all their friends. She pushed him for affection… he didn't like that.

"Did you hear me, I said I think I may be gay." he said. He watched his grandma intently."Yes I heard you, and I think if you are figuring out something about who you are it is cause for celebration." "You do?" he asked surprised. "Yes of course." " Well, I didn't say I am gay, I said I think I may be."

" When we talked yesterday, I think you may have gotten the wrong impression. I kissed that guy because I was drunk that's all… I'm not gay." the disgust and self loathing were eating him alive. He was a coward and he knew it.

"I'm tired of trying to be something I'm not. I'm gay… No taksies back this time. I mean it I'm gay." he said, again talking to his grandma."I think that wonderful." she smiled at him. She threw her arm around his neck. "Well would you look at that…" she teased, "you told me you are gay and the sky isn't falling." he smiled and hugged her tightly.

Gabi was crying in the park… "Will, I'm pregnant." he hugged her to him. "It will be alright I know it seems huge, but everything will be fine. You have to tell Nick, he is the father. He deserves to know." Gabi shaking her head, "It's more complicated than that." He shook his head "No I don't think it is." Gabi nodded her head sadly. "You are the father Will." that stunned feeling he felt. " Are you sure?" he asked, hoping… no praying that it couldn't be true.

He stood up in the church… "I can't go through with this, Gabi I'm sorry. The truth is going to come out. Chad was telling the truth, Nick isn't the father of Gabi's baby I am."

"Sonny, I love you, and I don't want this to change anything. It doesn't have to change anything." Will pleaded "On what planet? This changes everything." Sonny sneered at him before fleeing the church.

"Do you still feel this way?" Sonny asked holding up the card that Will had written him. "Do you still wish we could start over?" he nodded, yes of course he wanted to start over.. "Then I am glad I sent you that Valentines day present." Sonny said pulling him in for a kiss.

"Make Will Horton fall in love with me." Sonny read aloud. "You just wrote that." Will said laughing grabbing for the paper. "No I wrote it last year, I swear."

" Do you Will Horton take Sonny Kiriakis as…." Yes he had married Sonny. He had fallen in love with him.

Then chasing his dream he had gone to California with his mom and when he came everything had been different. California had been a learning experience for him, He learned who he was without Sonny, who he was as an individual. Not that he didn't still love Sonny, he did Life just became difficult, there were fights, horrible fights, money problems. All of it together was making him miserable. Sonny's constant criticism of his writing pushed him to work harder, and then Sonny started displaying jealousy over his work. His blatant disrespect of Wills career ambition had drove a wedge between them. Sonny had become different, evasive and secretive…. Not the person that he had married at all. Though to be completely honest he was different and was always after the next big story. He was out to prove that he was somebody…

"What's the big question Will?" Paul asked. Will opened his mouth, "I uh… ah" he closed it again. "Are you afraid to ask?" Paul taunted. "No." he whispered. He gathered his courage, swallowed thickly and then forged ahead "Are you gay?" he rushed out. "Do you think I am gay Will?" Paul asked softly. His eyes twinkling as he moved closer to him. " Yes, Yes I do." he answered. "Are you gay Will?" Paul asked. " Yes I am." he said. "Then I will answer your question." And then Paul was on him, his mouth devouring Will's, his tongue sweeping in, taking what he wanted.…. and Will felt alive for the first time in months.

The air in the room was thick with an almost tangible tension. It hadn't been more than a couple days since Will's story about Paul Narita had hit the Sonix website, and the truth had come out about his affair... yes that's right, one slip up could be called an indiscretion … multiples, well those are called affairs.

"I am leaving." Sonny proclaimed. " I am going on a Titan business trip for my uncle Vic." He announced out of the blue.

"Sonny, I'm sorry I know I hurt you but we can fix this, we can make it right." Will whined.

"How can we do that Will, I can't even stand to look at you." Sonny said sadly. "I am filing for a legal separation."

"Sonny." he pleaded. "What about Arianna?"

"I will always be her dad, but I can't do this anymore Will. I'm sorry." he picked up the bag that Will had not seen till that very moment and slammed out of the apartment. Will collapsed on the sofa, the tears coming freely. He had made mistakes, but dammit so had Sonny, he just wasn't willing to own up to his.

Weeks… that's how long Sonny was gone… weeks. He himself had long since broken off things with Paul. And though it was wrong, he had blamed Paul for everything, even knowing that mostly it was his own fault. He had went back time and time again knowing full well what was going to happen… but well he hadn't been feeling very fair minded. Everything was someone else's fault.

He called Sonny every day. Sonny answered zero times, unanswered calls had been the beginning of the end of any feelings he could ever have for Sonny. If his Grandma Marlena taught him anything, it was that no matter the indiscretion, you never turn your back on someone you love…. EVER.

The day he died he was at Abigail's waiting for the cable man right? At least that's how he remembered it. He laid down on the couch subconsciously letting go of his last remaining shred of hope. But then Ben had shown up, and things had went south, "I'm sorry Will… I didn't want to have to kill you, but you know too much."

He was being shaken. "No no what have I done…. Noooo" the sobbing mantra being repeated above came back to reality, back to the present. Ben was shaking him.. " Please don't be dead."

Will realized the other man had let go of the tie, Will gathered his strength and shoved the other man hard. He took him by surprise, knocking him off of him, and ripping the tie away from his throat. He crawled to his knees and staggered to his feet holding on to the back of the couch. "What the hell was that?" he screamed. His voice coming out sounding scratchy and raw.

"I didn't want to do it…. She made me do." Ben screamed.

"Who made you do it?" Will asked confused. "His mind was reeling with the memories that were still flooding back. He was confused, and terrified.

"Her!" Ben said pointing to Sami as she made her way from the bedroom where she had been hiding.

"Get in here." she called and on cue two men swooped in and grabbed Ben, they cuffed him and hauled him out of the room.

Will sat down on the couch gulping lungfuls of air. He held his hands to his throat, it was already swelling from the trauma.

"Will… are you okay, did it work?" Sami cried. "It did right? Do you remember anything?"

"What the hell were you thinking?" he screamed at her, his throat felt like it was on fire.

"I'm trying to help you Will." she cried. "I wasn't going to let him really hurt you."

"Are you serious right now? He was strangling me… again." Will bellowed.

"I promise baby, I had it all under control." she said. "My mom said that reliving a traumatic experience may help you remember." she said explaining her motive.

"So you thought breaking a psychotic murderer out of the psychiatric hospital and leaving him in a room alone with me was a good idea?" Will asked incredulously. "You're insane."

"You were never alone." she said. "But it had to feel real to work… Did it work?" she asked hopefully.

"You're a terrible person." He screamed and then leaped off the couch. "I don't ever want to see you again." he said as he ran from the apartment.

"Oh god… he will never forgive me for this. Sami said holding her head in her hands.


	2. Chapter 2

Will's phone rang effectively pulling him from his musings. He sighed heavily as he looked at the caller ID display. It was literally the twentieth call from his mother since she had let that psycho nearly strangle him to death… again. He did have to admit that he admired her tenacity. Well he did now that he understood it. He really did now that he understood who she is as a person, everything that she had put him through made much more sense. She had never been one to give up.

He had a slight headache and he kinda felt like he had run a marathon with his memories hadn't stopped since the flood gates had been opened. They were like a bad movie that he couldn't get away from. Every mistake, every bad decision he had ever made, playing out in his mind.

His thoughts turned back to his mom as his phone indicated he had yet another voicemail message. If she kept that up, his voicemail box would be full again before the end of the day. He would forgive her of course, but she deserved to suffer it out a while longer. This was up there near the top on the Sami Brady scale of depravity, but it likely wasn't the most horrible thing she had ever done. Come on, she had lied about who his father was, used him as a pawn to steal his Aunt Carrie's boyfriend. She had helped Gabi and his grandma Kate kill Nick, or at least they thought they had killed him, and she was okay shoving him in the river and covering it up.. her list of discretions was long. There were probably scores of things that she had done, in the name of love, or family that he didn't have a clue about, So technically going as far as to break some chemically imbalanced psychotic killer out of a mental institution and force him to strangle her recently back from the dead son, probably seemed like a minor plot moment in her movie…

He would talk to her eventually. But he had spent the last couple of days thinking about it and he had decided to play his cards close to the vest on the memory thing. He just wasn't ready to tell anyone, especially not her. First of all he would never hear the end of it, and also once she knew, the whole town would know. To be really honest, he wasn't sure his old life was anything he wanted to revisit. Wouldn't it be better to just start over, with a clean slate? He was finding out that it was much easier to not succumb to the pressure of going back to his old life when he didn't remember that life.

There was a knock on the door. "Will, are you here?" Sonny called through the door.

Will groaned inwardly, and for a fleeting moment, he thought about being super quiet and pretending to not be home. Sonny was one of those people that wanted something from him, all the time. He wasn't satisfied with who he is now, and seemed desperate for Will to remember, and he pushed and pushed. He seemed to be determined there was going to be a second chance for them. Maybe it was his guilty conscious that made him press so hard. What was that he had said, 'If he had come back one day sooner none of this would have happened.' Apparently when he had been letting go of his last shred of hope, Sonny had been making plans to come back to him, how would he have even known that? Maybe he would have if Sonny had picked up the phone even once, but he hadn't… Sonny knocked again a little louder this time. Will sighed in disgust and got up. "Yeah." I'm here" he called going to the door and pulling it open. He guessed he should at least see if anything had changed since he could remember his life now. "Hey Sonny." he said stepping aside letting the other man in.

Sonny came in with a small box, which he promptly sat on the coffee table and turned to Will. "Hey!" he said warmly, reaching out to hug Will.

Will allowed himself to be pulled into the embrace, forced himself to not pull away. He was waiting for the feelings to come. Expected them, even though he was not sure he would welcome them, but he wanted to feel something. And he did… familiarity.

When Sonny made no move to release him after what seemed like an eternity, Will pulled back, awkwardly disentangling himself from Sonny's embrace. "Umm What are you doing here?" he asked, feigning interest in the box Sonny had dropped onto the coffee table, he was sure it was more pictures, but he wanted to redirect his attention to something besides trying to touch him.

"Sorry." Sonny said sheepishly,realizing that he had held on too long and made Will uncomfortable. He turned to the table and grabbed the box, looking for something to do with his hands. "I brought our wedding album and some other pictures for us to look at." he said, waiting for Will to take a seat next to him. "Maybe they will help?" he said hopefully.

Will suppressed the urge sigh again. "Great!" he said pasting a smile on his face and sitting down beside him.

"Come on Will, give it a chance." Sonny chided him, sensing his reluctance. "You never know what it will be that could bring back a memory."

"That's true." Will admitted grudgingly. Little did Sonny know, he remember more than Sonny wanted him to.

Sonny opened the album, the first picture was him, Sonny, and Marlena together just after the ceremony. Will had to admit that there could not have been a happier person on the planet that day. They had been been ecstatic.. Sadly that happiness had not lasted.

"Your Grandma Marlena performed our ceremony." Sonny said. "You always said how special that was for you, and it was easily the happiest day of our lives."

When Will remained quiet, Sonny turned the page. Will glanced at the next page, the second picture was of them standing in front of his Grandma Marlena hands clasped together, looking at each other like there was no one else in the room. That was when they had recited their vows, and Promised to love each other, ironically till death did them part.. and it had.

"You were so handsome that day, I couldn't keep my eyes off of you." Sonny said touching the picture reverently. He looked at Will longingly, and then curled his fingers into his palm, so that he wouldn't reach out again to touch Will like he wanted to.

"This one is one of my favorite pictures." he said turning to the next page, there they were on the dance floor, it was their first dance together as a married couple. He was chuckling at something that Sonny had said, as they had danced closely together. Will could remember exactly how he felt in that moment, how he had wanted it to go on forever.

Will was a little confused, where were the feelings that should be accompanying these memories? Surely he should be feeling something, nostalgia if nothing they were all shockingly absent. Will was surprised to find that he felt nothing. He couldn't even bring himself to feel sadness for what they had lost. What was done was done.

Oblivious to his inner monologue, Sonny plowed ahead with photos and stories from their reception.

Will patiently let Sonny flip through a few more, politely listening to his commentary. Then he stood and walked into the kitchen. He wasn't trying to be rude but he was a little tired of the stroll down memory lane. Sonny always left out the parts about their problems. To hear Sonny talk they had the picture perfect fairytale life.

"You want something to drink? There's tea, water, wine, beer…" he called.

"Water is fine." Sonny responded. "I thought if you feel up to it we could maybe grab some lunch or something today." he said when Will handed him the water. "I wanted us to spend some time together."

"Oh." Will said, "Sorry but I am having lunch with My

Grandmother." he said.

"That's okay, another time then." Sonny said. " I should get going. I have a couple of meetings over at Titan this afternoon anyway."

"Shouldn't you be spending time with Paul?" Will said. "Last I heard you two were engaged."

"I broke it off with him Will." Sonny said softly.

"Why would you do that?" Will asked, dumbfounded.

"Will, I can't be with him anymore, not now." He said. "We have been given this once in a lifetime second chance." he said wistfully. "I could never marry Paul now that I know you are alive."

"Sonny…" Will said. "You shouldn't change your whole life for something that is in the past. I don't..."

"It will all work out. You will see. You are gonna get your memories back and things will be better." Sonny said interrupting him. "But for now I had better go so you can get to your lunch date."

Will didn't know what else to say so he just went over and opened the door. "Okay, see you later" he said.

Sonny left the box on the table. "I will leave the albums here in case you want to look at them some more." he said as he made his way to the door. He stopped and leaned in kissing Will on the cheek. "Bye Will." he said softly, before he walked out.

Will shut the door and then went back to the kitchen, he brought a bottle of beer into the living room and sat down. He eyed the box of pictures warily for quite a while and then finally picked up the first book and laid it aside. Then he picked up a stack of snapshots and sorted through them.

Fourth of July at the beach, they were all grins and giggles, there were snapshots of the playing volleyball and blurry pictures of the fireworks, he and Sonny shooting hoops with their friends at the gym, he and Gabi at her last doctors appointment before Arianna's arrival holding up a picture of her final ultrasound, him asleep on the couch with Arianna nestled on his chest also asleep. Lots of memories… more things for him to think about.

He hadn't seen Arianna since his memories had come back. He had stayed away this last couple of days, trying not to give himself away. But he really should go and see her... maybe before his lunch with his grandma. Once he made his decision he drained the last of the beer from the bottle and dropped into the trash, then grabbed his phone, and crammed it into his back pocket. He opened the door, just as Paul raised his hand to knock.

Now there was a very happy unexpected surprise. "Paul…. What are you doing here?" he asked.

"I came to see my dad. Is he home?" Paul asked, walking into the apartment when Will motioned for him to come in.

"Um sorry no.." Will said, "There's no one here but little ole me." he batted his eyes comically at Paul.

"It looked like you were on your way out. I can come back later or I can just call him and find out where he is" he said not paying any attention to Will's antics, he moved back toward the door.

"It's fine, I was just going out to get some air, I feel like I am going stir crazy in here… you know, no job, no friends, no life."

"Will come on, you know that is not true. Everyone in this town loves you. They are all sitting on pins and needles waiting for you to remember that you love them too." Paul said.

"Yeah that's just it…" Will said sadly, "Everyone in this town knows me, and they all want something from me."

"Don't you want to remember?" Paul asked curiously.

"It's not that I don't want to." Will said evasively. "It's more that I want to be accepted for who I am now. Does that make sense?"

"Yeah, makes sense to me." Paul said, "But you know they probably feel like it is bothering you that you cant remember everything, so maybe they are all just worried and upset for you."

"I guess so…" Will conceded. " What about you Paul? He asked, a small sexy smile playing on his lips. "Are you worried that I may be upset?" he asked teasingly.

""I think it would be good for you if you could remember, if you want to remember that is. It could really fill in some gaps for you." Paul said.

"But what's wrong with me, like I am now?" Will asked him.

"Nothing at all." Paul said, sitting down on the couch. He picked up the wedding album from the table. "Sonny came by?" he guessed.

"Yeah. Another well meaning memory recon mission..." Will said. "He told me about our wedding day."

"I'm guessing there was no luck." Paul observed. "Given your sarcasm."

"Nope." Will said popping his lips on the p. "No luck."

"I wouldn't stress it." Paul said. "Your memories will come back, when they are ready."

"I'm not the one stressing it, believe me." Will said. " I don't have to everyone around me is stressing it enough.I guess until they can fix me, I am just damaged goods."

Paul chuckled at that. "I'm sorry this has been so rough for you." he said. "I know it must seem like everyone has their own ideas about how to "fix" you But I promise not to try and force you to remember anything."

"Thanks." Will said sitting down on the couch, close to reach out and touch Paul if he wanted. "I think that's why I like being around you." He said stretching his arm along the back of the couch….. "No pressure." But since you're here, maybe you can tell me about the person you think I was."

Paul smiled. "I just promised not to try and force you to remember anything." he teased. "Now you want me to bombard you with memories?

"Yeah, you did but you aren't forcing, you didn't show up here out of the blue with a box of mementos. I asked, because I really want to know." Will said.

"Well we don't have any memories like that, there isn't a shoebox full of pictures immortalizing anything that we may have done." Paul said. "It's not like we were best friends.."

He knew Paul was right, but there were at least a couple… his mind travelled back to that day, just after New Years..he could almost hear the shutter click on Paul's camera... "Stop it Paul." Will giggled, "give me the phone." He said reaching for it again, click, click… he grabbed for it, even though it was way out of his reach. Paul put the phone down on the nightstand and rolled on top of Will. He kissed Will soundly on the lips. "You have to delete those." Will said. "Come on Will, it's just a few pictures." Paul said tickling his side. "I mean it Paul, they are pictures of us naked in bed together." Will said. "What will the magazine think if they get out?" he said using the only excuse he could think of. "Oh, ai am not sharing those with anyone, nobody will see them, I promise" Paul said, kissing his lips, his cheek, moving on to his neck and just like that the phone and the photographs were forgotten about.

"Will?" Paul said pulling him back to the present. "Where were you just now?"

"Sorry." he said I was just trying to remember.. So we weren't exactly best friends, that sounds ominous. Tell me Paul, if we weren't friends, were we enemies?" he asked.

"Uh I should probably go." Paul said getting up and making his way to the door. "I will see you around Will." he said hurrying out the door.

Will sat silent for a few minutes, wondering about Paul's reaction. Did he not want to relive the past, or maybe he thought it best to let sleeping dogs lie. After all he was engaged to Sonny, or rather he had been. Will hadn't quite figured out how that was supposed to work out now.

Part of him wondered if Sonny was just pushing to get his memories back so that he could move on with his own life, guilt free. Or did he think that they could go back and relive their lives, hopefully with a different outcome?

What was Paul's position on this? He didn't think he would ever be able to take everything on the chin like Paul did, if the situations were reversed. He had a little too much Sami Brady in him.

He glanced at the time.. It was time for him to head to the pub to meet his grandmother.


	3. Chapter 3

_Authors note: Just an FYI for you guys. Going forward you will notice that I used some original dialogue from the show, Some dialogue I altered to fit my story line or even assigned to a different character , and Some of it I omitted on purpose. It wasn't done in error. Thanks for reading. I hope you all enjoy it!_

Will walked in the pub and looked around. His grandmother was nowhere to be seen. He glanced down at his watch, to make sure he wasn't late. No he wasn't late, well not that late, only about five minutes.

He walked over to the bar and ordered himself a soda then took it to the table in the corner. He sat down, pulled out his phone, thinking he may text her. He was working on composing a message when he heard a familiar voice.

"Will, Oh my God, thank God I ran into you…. I have been calling you and calling you for three days is something wrong with your phone?" Sami said sitting down across from him without asking for permission. She snatched his phone from his hands and glanced at the screen. "Of course you are talking to my mother." she said throwing it down in disgust.

Will looked up at her, he rolled his eyes. "No, there's nothing wrong with my phone!" he snapped, there was a hard edge to his voice, "Maybe I just don't want to talk to you, did you ever think about that?" he asked as he picked his phone up and tucked it away, into his back pocket.

She narrowed her eyes at him. "I am your mother!"

"Yes, supposably you are, my mother who broke a crazy person out of an insane asylum and told him to strangle me." Will screeched, playing his part perfectly.

"Would you keep your voice down?" Sami said looking around the room to see if anyone was paying attention to them. "I could go to jail for that." she whispered.

"Good! You should." Will said showing her no mercy. "Anyway, I thought that I told you I never wanted to see you again. YET HERE YOU ARE."

"I am your mother." Sami repeated.

"You say that like it gives you a license to do whatever you want, do you know that?" Will accused.

"Okay look, I'm sorry okay, there I said it..…. I don't want to argue." she said, "I wanted you to know I really was trying to help you."

"By almost getting me killed?" Will said incredulously. "Explain to me how that is helping me?"

"I was trying to help you get your memory back" she said, tears brimming in her eyes. "Maybe I did go too far, I know you don't remember but going to far is kind of my M.O. I swear I was never ever gonna let him hurt you."

Will was feeling bad, he did know that despite all of her crazy neurotic ways of showing it, she did always have her kids best interest at heart.

He reached across the table and took her hand in his, "Okay…. " he said. "Maybe you were trying to help, but you have to see how twisted that was. Please don't ever do that to me again." he said.

"I promise…" she breathed, looking more relaxed instantly. "You mean it, you really forgive me?" she asked.

"I guess we are all due a few mistakes." Will said. "But this was your one big one." he said as an afterthought.

He heard the bell over the door jingle. He looked up to see his Grandma Marlena coming in. She came over to the table.

"Hi.. she said. "I am soo happy to see you both here together."

It was all he could do to resist the urge to get up and hug her tightly. "Hi grandma." he said instead.

Marlena turned and beamed at him. "Hi there." she said. "May I?" she asked motioning to the seat.

"Yes of course." He said, immediately scooting over, giving her room to sit down.

She sat down and put her arm around his shoulder. "I am so glad that you are here with us." she said, her eyes brimming with unshed tears. "We are so incredibly lucky, aren't we Sami?" she said looking over at Sami expectantly.

"Yes of course." Sami agreed, suddenly uncomfortable. Surely Will would not tell her mother what she had done… right? "Well I have some things to take care of, so I will catch up with you both later... " she stood up and picked up her purse from the table. "Thank you Will for giving me another chance." she said leaning down and quickly kissing his cheek before hurrying out the door.

"I hope I didn't interrupt and run her off." Marlena said, watching her go.

"No not at all." Will said. "I didn't know she was going to be here.

"UH Huh, and what were you forgiving her and giving her another chance for?" she asked.

"Nothing." Will said, suddenly becoming interested in the desserts menu that was tucked between the salt and pepper shakers and the napkin holder.

"I know she can be a little over the top sometimes." Marlena said, "Sometimes she just can't help herself."

"You can say that again." Will said chuckling. "That is definitely one of the things that I have learned in the short time I have been here."

"So how are you doing, do you feel like you are settling in and getting comfortable?" she asked.

" I guess so." Will said. " I have been thinking, I have to find me an apartment or something, and definitely a job.

"You are welcome to stay with me and John for as long as you want to." she said. "There is no reason to rush."

"I know that." Will said, "And I really appreciate it, but I can't take advantage of you forever."

"Will, honey it's not taking advantage, we love you." she said.

"Did you know that Sonny and Paul broke up?" he asked, changing the direction of the conversation.

"Yes, I heard, Paul told John about it." she answered. "How do you feel about that?"

"Why should it matter to me." he said shrugging his shoulders.

"Technically Sonny is still your husband." she reminded him.

"Yeah, I know…" he hedged, "But we were apart when I supposedly died right? I believe the term was legally separated, so what he does now, really isn't my business."

"I see." she said. "Have you thought about getting back together with Sonny? Maybe giving things between you two another shot?"

"I thought about it, but I don't think it will work." Will said.

"Why is that?" she asked. "Maybe you should talk to Sonny, and let him tell you about your lives together."

"Been down that road already." he said. "This morning he came by with photos from our wedding. Yesterday he brought over some of Arianna's baby things…. The quest for my elusive memories never seems to end."

"Sounds like you want it to." she observed.

"I'm just tired of everyone pushing me to remember." he said.

"Honey, I am sure Sonny doesn't mean to push, he is probably just anxious for you two to get past this and be able to move on with your lives together." she said.

"That's not going to happen." Will said matter of factly. "I am not interested in doing that."

Marlena looked at him, shocked. "Honey, how can you know that?" she asked. "You don't even remember your life together."

" _Damn."_ he thought. " _Me and my big mouth_." he shrugged, "I don't know, I just don't have those kinds of feelings toward him, maybe I used to… I mean obviously I used to, but I am just not attracted to him now."

"Oh, okay then." she said slowly. "Well when you get your memory back, it could very well bring back all the things you loved about him."

"As I said, We were separated right? When I died I mean?" he asked, "Sonny told me he wasn't even here in Salem, so it kinda sounds like it was already over between us." u.s. he picked up a napkin from the table and began toying with it.

"Well you two had been through a bit of a rough patch." she said carefully. "And Sonny had been away for several weeks when Ben strangled you." she admitted.

"What kind of rough patch?" he asked.

"Well, I think you should talk to Sonny about that." she said, avoiding his question. She felt it was a little too much, a little too fast.

"What about Paul?" he asked. "What's his story?"

"Do you mean how did you two meet?" she asked.

He nodded yes, but remained silent.

"Paul used to be a major league baseball player, and you wrote a story on him when you worked for that online magazine." she said giving him the basics. " if you don't mind me asking, why do you seem so interested in Paul?"

"Oh, he came by this morning looking for John." he said, "we talked for a bit, he is really nice."

"Yes he is." Marlena said. "What did you two talk about?"

"Oh you know people, my memories, Sonny… " he said.

"And you like talking to Paul." she asked. "Stating the obvious, since Will's eyes had come alive when he asked about him, they were no longer dull, but sparking and bright.

"Well yeah." he admitted. "I feel like I can be the me that I am now with him, he just accepts me like I am, he doesn't try to change me."

"Oh Sweetheart, none of us are trying to change you, we just want you to be able to get back the life you once had." she said reaching out and squeezing his hand.

"What if I don't want that life back? What's wrong with me making a new life?" he said.

"There's absolutely nothing wrong with that, if that's what you want." she said. "but I think that it would be very hard for you to decide you don't want it when you don't know what it was like."

"Because…." Will said, "I want to be done with all of this pressure to be the person that all of you remember, I don't know how to be that person, and I want to feel free to be the person that I am now…. And Also, I am really attracted to Paul." he rushed out.

Marlena looked at him with that shocked look on her face again.

"Why do you think that is?" she said, recovering quickly.

"I don't know, maybe because it is so easy to be around him, or maybe because he is super hot." he teased.

She smiled at him, "So you have a physical attraction to him. That is perfectly normal. He is very handsome."

Will just nodded his agreement.

"I must caution you to be careful Will, the three of you have a lot of complicated history together, and you are all kind of going through a similar situation right now and I don't want to see any of you get hurt." she said kindly.

"Similar situation?" he asked.

"Well yes, You and Sonny were married, Paul and Sonny were almost married and You and Paul… just be careful okay." she said stopping mid sentence and changing direction.

"What about me and Paul?" he asked.

"Just forget that I said anything, I shouldn't have brought that up." she said.

"Grandma.. just tell me." he said. "I am a grown man, and I spent the last couple years of my life with a crazy mother who lied and brainwashed me into thinking that I was EJ Dimera and had me believing that I had been married to Sami, who turned out to be my real crazy mother, who incidentally will probably lie to me for the rest of my life soo... Whatever you were about to say I think I can take it, don't you?"

"All very good points." Marlena conceded, "But it isn't my place. You should go and see Sonny, ask him if you want to know." she said glancing down at her watch. "Now I have to go I have a patient, I will see you at home later on?" she asked.

"Bye grandma, see you at home." he said. "Thanks for lunch."

"Anytime my precious boy." she said getting up to leave. He watched as she walked out the door.

He carefully considered his options. He could go see Sonny and ask about Paul, now that he had a reason to. But In all honesty he didn't want to see Sonny, but he did want to see Paul.

He got up from the table and went to the register to pay, then he left and headed toward Paul's apartment building. All the while thinking about how he wanted to open the conversation… there were a few possibilities.

He was so deep in thought that he was surprised when he realized that he was at the apartments. He took a deep breath and went in taking the elevator to the fourth floor.

He went down the hall and then knocked on Paul's door. "It wasn't more than a few seconds when the door was pulled open and Paul stood there with a towel wrapped around his hips, beads of water still clinging to his upper torso.

Will's mouth went dry, he licked his lips. He couldn't remember what he was supposed to say.

They started at each other for a full minute, before he regained the ability to speak.

"Hi." he said "Can I come in?" he asked, unable to keep his eyes from wandering and admiring the view.

Paul moved aside to let him in, "Sure, just let me go get dressed."

"What's the rush?" Will smirked, staring unabashedly at him.

"What are you doing here Will?" Paul asked, crossing his arms over his chest.

"I had lunch with my Grandma today." he said. His eyes traveling down the expanse of Paul's chest. He could remember what it was like to touch him, and that was exactly what he wanted to do right now. Instead of giving into that particular temptation he shoved his hands deep into the pockets of his jeans.

"So, what does that have to do with me." Paul asked confused. He waited a second and then cleared his throat, bringing Will's wandering eyes back to his own.

"Sorry." Will said, "I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable. I just had to hide that part of myself for so long, It's nice to be able to admit to being attracted to someone."

"I'm not uncomfortable." Paul said. "I am surprised to see you. Didn't Susan know you were gay?" he asked.

"Well technically speaking yes, but that didn't really fit into who EJ Dimera was, so eventually I learned it was best to keep my feelings to myself."

"I'm sorry you had to hide that part of yourself." Paul said.

"Me too." Will admitted, his eyes still perusing Paul's body. "Nobody should have to hide who they are."

"You're staring again." Paul said with amusement.

Will blushed "Sorry." he said sheepishly.

"No sweat." Paul said, "But I am going to get dressed now."

He disappeared from the room leaving Will to his own unadulterated thoughts. It would be so easy for them to pick up where they had left off, if he hadn't been such an asshat to him and pretended that everything was all his fault when he had ended things.

"So tell me, what does you having lunch with your grandmother have to do with me?" Paul asked again, coming back into the room fastening his jeans.

Will watched in silence as he pulled a shirt from the chest of drawers and pulled it over his head.

"She said that we have a history together." he said.

Paul looked up surprised. "She told you that?" he asked.

"Well yes and no she wouldn't tell me what kind of history… but she hinted at it." he answered.

"What do you mean?" Paul asked.

"She cautioned me to be careful, that you, Sonny and Me, we are all in a similar situation. As I understand it, Me and Sonny were married, You and Sonny were going to get married, and You and I… well she clammed up about that and wouldn't tell me any more..." Will said, waiting expectantly for Paul to confirm or deny it.

Paul was quiet for several minutes "I think you should talk to Sonny about this." he finally said.

"That's what she said, and I don't want to talk to Sonny about it, I'm talking to you." Will said…. Waiting again.

"Yes." he said, ""We have a history, but that's all it is, just history."

"Oh, well it's new to me, and If you don't mind I would like to hear about it." Will said.

"Okay." Paul relented. "Where would you like me to start?"

"The beginning of course." Will said.


	4. Chapter 4

"The beginning huh?" Paul said, contemplating how much he wanted to share. He wasn't sure Will was ready to hear everything about his past. Besides Will had openly flirted with him at every opportunity and the last thing he wanted to do was give him any false hope.

He decided to just give him the basic information. "Why don't I just give you the condensed version." he said. "We met when you were writing an article about me for Sonix magazine, that's where you used to work back when I was a major league pitcher. We spent a lot of time together, and eventually we slept together. The article came out and we were over. That's about all there is to it." he finished quickly. "See just history."

"Wait a minute…it maybe history to you," he didn't think it really was or Paul wouldn't be trying to hard to seem like it didn't matter. "But it's new to me." Will said, letting Paul's words soak in. Paul was obviously leaving quite a bit out, that seemed so few words to describe what happened between them, he remembered it quite differently. So the question was why was Paul holding so much back.

"Maybe you could answer a couple questions for me." Will said.

Paul shrugged, but didn't answer otherwise.

"Sonny and I were in love right?" Will asked.

"Yeah, I guess so." Paul said.

"Seriously all I have heard from everyone in this town from the second I got here, is how much Sonny and I were in love, how happy we were… basically my life was all unicorns and rainbows." he was getting exasperated. "So what I wanna know is…. if that is true, why would I sleep with you?"

"Like I said we were spending a lot of time together, you were at my hotel almost every night conducting your interviews." Yes he remembered that well, it had started as interviews.. then when things had started to intensify between them, it turned into him finding reasons to go over there… clarifications on things Paul had said, further questions about a topic they had discussed. It even became somewhat of a game between them. If he wasn't finding an excuse to go over there, Paul was looking for one to get him to stop by. "We just got to know each other, and I was dealing with a lot, going through a lonely time in my life." Paul continued, "I had just learned that I could never play ball again." Paul said quietly. Will remembered the very minute that Paul had told him that the doctor had said his career was over. He would never forget the way he had felt as he watched Paul struggle to hold the emotion in. He looked at Paul now he, noting that had a faraway look in his eye. Will waited quietly for him to continue. "Eh, anyway one thing lead to another and things just happened."

"So I basically took advantage of your pain and seduced you." That was what he was hinting at right? Funny that he didn't remember it quite that way, he had always kind of felt like he had been the one that was seduced. But hey who was he to tell Paul how his memories should go.

"You wanna know what I think?" Will asked, not pausing to wait for a response. "I think that things weren't going so great at home for me anymore and I think that you made me forget about all that. What kind of man lets his husband hang out in a single mans hotel room all the time anyway?" he said.

"Knowing Sonny my guess is he didn't like it much, But at the time, I didn't know you were married, you never said a word till the day you came to my room to tell me the article had been submitted and that we were done."

"I kept that a secret too?" How did you not know I was married?" Will asked not understanding, "Why would that have been a secret, and a ring is a hard thing to miss."

"You never wore your wedding ring to my hotel room." Paul said, looking around the room uncomfortably. "I remember, I uh checked when you first came to my door. I was shocked that you were so young, and of course I found you very attractive back then."

"Oh!" Will said, giving him a cocky grin. "But not now?" he asked changing his grin to a pout.

"Will come on, you know how attractive you are." Paul said grudgingly.

"Back to the ring, thing, Why would I do something like that?" Will pressed, "I am sounding more and more like a son of a bitch."

"No, Paul denied, "You were doing as you were told. Your editor thought you may get a better story as a hot single reporter."

"And I am guessing since we slept together and I basically outed you to the world she was right on the money about that one." Will said.

"Hold up… who told you that you outed me?" Paul asked, watching him carefully. "Did you just remember that?"

"Umm no." Will blushed, he looked down at his feet and rubbed his hands together. "I read the article." he admitted.

"How did you know to read the article?" Paul asked suspiciously.

"Ok truth?" he asked looking at Paul. At least he could tell him that Marlena had told him all of that, and she had for the most part.

"Yes." he said.

"My grandma Marlena told me almost everything you just told me, and I had to read it, to see what it was all about. But to be honest that wasn't the first time I had seen that article." he said.

"Of course you would have seen it before, you wrote it. Did the article seem familiar?" Paul asked excitedly. The sooner Will remembered, the sooner things could get back to normal.

"No, nothing like that, but when I was in Memphis with Susan, I had a laptop and access to the internet, and remember I was closeted basically. But I was a baseball fan and the story about you not being able to pitch anymore was big news, you coming out as gay was even bigger news. So I had read the article already. I even remember the magazine site I read it on boasting about it being an 'Exclusive' interview."

"Wow so you read your own article and never knew it? He asked. "Man that has got to suck."

"Pretty much!" Will said deciding deciding to shake things up, he sat down on the bed. "So tell me was the sex between us good?" he asked out of the blue.

Paul stared at him dumbfounded. "What difference does that make?" he asked.

"Well, I don't remember being with you." Will cringed inside, damnit, that was a blatant lie. "And I wanna know." He smirked.

When Paul hesitated, he pushed a little further. "Come on can't you just tell me the truth?" he asked. "It's my memory too."

Paul rolled his eyes and stood there silently. He was looking at a completely different person than he had known in the past, Old Will had been kind of shy and, skittish, nowhere near as confident as this new cocky, flirty person he was dealing with now. It made him even more attractive, if that was possible.

"Well?" Will pressed.

"Yes." Paul said.

"Yes what?" Will asked.

"Yes it was good." Paul said.

"That's it, that's all you got." Will smirked again. "No details?"

"No details… " Paul affirmed. "Like I said, it's history."

"Doesn't have to be." Will said brazenly.

"Um, I think you should probably go." Paul said. Turning and walking toward the door.

"Why?" Will asked, stopping Paul in his tracks. "Did I make you uncomfortable again?"

"No, it's not that." Paul said.

"Then what is it exactly?" Will forged on.

"Look," he said running a hand through his hair. "Up until a couple of days ago I was engaged to be married, and you, well you are actually married to Sonny." Paul said. "It wouldn't wouldn't be right."

"First of all legally separated I believe is the correct term." Will reminded him, why did people in this town keep forgetting that…. "and Second, That didn't stop us the first time, besides tell me, it wouldn't be right for who, I noticed that you didn't really deny wanting exactly that."

"It would be wrong on so many levels." Paul said.

"Name one." Will said.

Paul chuckled. "Just one? Okay then, I still love Sonny." he said looking at Will evenly.

"Oh?" Will said, he had to admit he was a little surprised, even though he shouldn't be. As Paul had mentioned until a couple of days ago they had been engaged. "That's interesting."

"What do you mean?" Paul asked confused...

"You still loving him, even though he dumped you for me?" Will stated bluntly.

"He didn't dump me for you." Paul denied, "Sonny went through hell after he found out you could still be alive."

"And you stood by him, and he broke up with you basically as soon as you all found me." Will said matter of factly. "Sounds like his loss to me." he winked at Paul.

"It's temporary, we will work it out." Paul said. "I shouldn't even be having this conversation with you.

Will stood up and took a step toward Paul, "I hope for your sake, that you don't really believe that." he said sincerely. "But I get it, I'm sure you need time to process… I can wait." he said walking past him. He got to the door and turned back to the other man.

"If it means anything now, I really am sorry for the way I treated you, I should have never used you for a story like that." he said. "And I am sorry again for the staring, and making you uncomfortable, I hope one day we can at least be friends."

"it's okay really, it was actually a little flattering." Paul admitted. "I would like it if we could be friends."

"Me too." Will whispered. He opened the door and turned for one more look at Paul, then he realized that Paul had followed him to the door. He couldn't resist pushing the door closed, he reached out and grabbed Paul's wrist and pulled him close. Will wrapped one hand around Paul's neck and covered his lips with his own.

Paul's hands went to Wills arms, presumably to push him away, only to end up pulling him closer, he opened his mouth under Wills and allowed Will the entrance he was seeking.

His hands left Will's arms and travelled to his hips, pulling him in even closer.

Will groaned and deepened the kiss. Somewhere in his gut he knew that deep down Paul still wanted this. He remembered the passionate way that Paul had always responded to him, and the way that he came alive when Paul touched him.

He explored Paul's mouth leisurely getting reacquainted. One of Paul's hands gripped his hip tightly, while the other found its it's way to his back, his thumb traced the skin just above the waistband of his jeans.

Wills hands went on a scouting mission of their own, traveling down his chest, over his sides to his back. He stroked his back softly. His mouth left Paul's and he planted small kisses along the side of his face to his neck and sucked his ear lobe into his mouth, biting him gingerly. His hands slid down over Paul's ass bringing their hips together.

He pulled back and rested his forehead against Paul's, their ragged breath mingling together. Paul's fingers had somehow wrapped in Will's shirt holding him still.

"Will." he whispered. "We shouldn't be doing this. We have to think of Sonny."

"Shh..." Will answered. "I don't want Sonny, if it isn't already obvious to you, I want you."

Paul's eyes slid closed. He should fight this harder, he knew that. But Will was right Sonny had dumped him as soon as they had found Will. But truth be told the Sonny that wanted to marry him was gone the moment Ben busted in on their wedding and announced that Will was alive.

He moved his hands to Will's face and brought their lips back together. He swept his tongue into Will's mouth exploring everywhere all at once. He moaned when he felt Will's fingers under the hem of his shirt, skin to skin.

An insistent knock on the door broke the spell. Paul wrenched his mouth from Will's his chest heaving. "We don't have to get that." Will encouraged. "They will go away."

"No, it may.." Paul started.

"Paul." Sonny called through the door. "I know you are upset with me but I need to talk to you."

"It's Sonny." Paul said unnecessarily as he sprang away from Will. He quickly swiped the back of his hand over his mouth and straightened his clothes.

"Why so it is." Will said turning the knob and pulling the door open. "Hey Sonny." he said.

"Will." Sonny said, clearly confused. "What are you doing here?" he asked.

Will looked at Paul, "Do you wanna tell him or should I?" he asked.

"Will had some questions that he needed answers to." Paul answered.

"Will doesn't doesn't need you for that, he has plenty of people in his life to answer his questions." Sonny ground out, then he turned to Will. "I will answer any questions that you have Will, you know that."

"Do I?" Will asked. "Then out of curiosity why haven't you told me that I cheated on you."

Sonny's face drained of color at those words, as they hit him like a dash of cold water in the face. "I didn't think it was important to tell you that right now." Sonny said to Will. He looked at Paul, "This is what you thought he needed to hear right now?" he asked, his voice rising.

"Hey, I didn't tell him anything that he didn't already know." Paul said. He was getting a little tired of Sonny acting like Will should be treated with kid gloves. "Marlena told him."

"Will." Sonny said. "We can figure all of this out and I will answer all of your questions I promise."

"Yeah. Well exactly when did you think may be a good time? Is there a good time to tell me that the perfect picture that you have created of our marriage and our subsequent life together is a lie?" Will said skeptically. "Paul here has been only one with guts enough to tell me the truth. That's why I came to him, besides it was our memory, our affair… so he was the logical choice. I'm sorry if that hurts you." He said. "Anyway you came here to Paul's apartment, after you told me earlier today that you and Paul were done and you had Titan meetings all afternoon. So I am guessing you came here for a reason and I will leave you two to work it out." he said.

"I came to check on Paul." Sonny said. "Nothing more." he played right into Wills hand.

"Oh okay, well I will let you get to that then, see you around." he turned and addressed Paul. "Thank you for the enlightening conversation, I sure hope we can pick up right where we left off next time." he said winking at Paul before walking out the door, closing it behind him.


	5. Chapter 5

"So you came, you checked…" Paul said bitterly. "As you can see I am fine, so you have done your due diligence, you can consider your guilty conscious assuaged now." he turned away from Sonny and quickly swiped at his eyes, mad at himself for not being able to control his emotions. So Sonny had come to 'check' on him… how the hell was that supposed to make him feel? Was that supposed to mean something to him, because it sure as hell didn't.

"Don't be like that." Sonny said. "I care about you, Paul. I know it may not feel like that now, but I swear I do. Besides how are you the one pissed off here? I should be the angry one." he said, his voice rising. "What the hell were you thinking telling Will those things about his past without asking me. He was nowhere near ready to hear any of that."

"Well if you had been listening earlier then you would already know I didn't tell him anything… Marlena did, What was I supposed to do, he came here with questions. All I did I was fill in the gaps. Did you expect me to lie to him?"

He turned back to Sonny, "Besides do you really think for one minute that Will doesn't know he is being lied to and manipulated?" Paul asked. "Because I promise you he does and he is sick of it. All of you just keep telling him about the great times, the fun times, the happy times. But as I remember Will has had a lot of sad, and emotional times too. Will knows that all of you are sugar coating everything and that no one is happy and carefree one hundred percent of the time." he said.

"Yeah, that may be true." Sonny said, but he doesn't need you filling his head with all that stuff right now. There will be plenty of time for all of that when he gets his memory back. He will eventually, you know, and then he will know all of it. I don't understand what you think the rush is for him to know now."

"He wants to know.." Paul said, "And he needs to know the truth, you think you are doing him a favor, just telling him all the perfect moments, but you aren't because when or IF he does get his memory back he is going to resent the hell out of you for lying to him." Paul said. "Can't you see that?"

Sonny narrowed his eyes at Paul.."This isn't any of your damned business, you stay away from Will." he snarled.

"You gonna tell Will to stay away from me?" Paul asked.

"Because I sure as hell didn't go looking for him, he came here to talk to me."

"Just stay away from him." Sonny said, "I mean it." he threatened, walking out the door slamming it behind him.

Paul sat down on the bed. His head was spinning with all he had been through in just a short few hours. The more he thought about it, the more angry he became with Sonny. Who was he to try and control who he spent time with, it had been Sonny's choice to break up, not his. And besides he didn't want to be attracted to Will, even though he was… a lot. He wanted to be true to Sonny, to their relationship, but for what? It wasn't like Sonny was interested in him. He was so busy trying to manipulate Will into coming back to him, there was no time for anything else. It was all so confusing.. And Will…. Well he was the most confusing for Paul. He seemed to want him now, he was certainly chasing didn't seemed confused in the least. He seemed to have a clear idea of what he wanted and an ever better idea of how to get it. But what would happen when he got his memory back, where would that leave Paul? He didn't know and that scared the hell out of him, made him want to be even more cautious.

Will lounged on his bed, arms folded behind his head, thinking about the day. It had been a very eventful day, and could have proved to be even more interesting if Sonny hadn't shown up at Paul's place this afternoon, that had been inconvenient.

Everytime he thought about how self righteous Sonny acted it made his blood boil. He had barged in ruining the afternoon, he almost acted like he owned him, like he was a piece of property. He insulted his intelligence by trying to make him feel bad for going to Paul for answers, like he was supposed to be the only one that Will could ask for anything. Control freak much? Well Sonny could think again, he had a mind of his own, and he was pretty adept at making his own decisions.

He wondered if Sonny had treated Paul that way when they had been together, while he had been dead, well somewhat dead … Before he had discarded him as if he were yesterday's garbage... or had he. Now that was an interesting thought, Will examined the facts, Sonny had shown up at Paul's with absolutely no idea that Will would be there. Why was that he wondered? Oh yeah to "Check on him". He had been flustered to see Will there, mad that he was there even? Or maybe embarrassed to have been caught there "checking on Paul" after telling Will that he and Paul were over earlier in the day. Something didn't seem quite right.

Unless he was missing his guess, and he didn't think he was, he knew Sonny well… he was pretty confident that Sonny was riding that fine line, trying to keep Paul hanging on, just in case he fell through. Sonny had shown his selfish side to him a long time ago. And he was also smart enough to know that Sonny was a little more than nervous that things weren't really going to work out to his liking. Especially since he had barely let Sonny hug him, much less anything else. He had to try very hard to keep himself from shrinking away from him everytime he reached out to touch him.

Paul didn't deserve that, he was the only one who just let him be… him. Paul didn't care if he remembered their past or not, or even if Will liked him or not. He was always the same old Paul, never trying to manipulate or change anyone. He shouldn't be waiting around for someone who treated him like he was second best. Paul was better than a back up plan.

Sonny seemed to have a complex, like soo many people in Salem he always tried to appear perfect, never wanted anybody to think anything less of him, and he didn't really care what he had to do to keep that image up. Truth be told you would be hard pressed to find someone in this town that didn't have a skeleton or two in their closet. There were many many times that he had felt like his feelings didn't matter at all while Sonny struggled to keep up appearances.

He closed his eyes and let the memories bombard his mind. There were soo many memories, so many times that he should have stopped to think about what he was doing, asked himself if he was really doing what was best for his life or maybe he way trying like hell to prove that he was good enough for Sonny. That had been a huge part of his life back then, trying to be good enough for a Kiriakis, and somehow he always seemed to fall short.

He had often wondered why Sonny decided to take him back. How he had gotten so lucky.. Back then he had convinced himself that it was a well earned second chance…. Now looking back with fresh eyes, he wasn't sure.

Will walked into the coffee shop, looking for Sonny, the day had been a disaster. He found Sonny behind the counter and walked up. "What?" Sonny asked, just one harsh word, cutting him to the quick.…. "I just wanted to explain things." he said, his voice hoarse from crying. "Things…" Sonny sneered at him. "Yeah." he said. "You mean your lies? And how are you gonna do that, with more lies?" He remembered the cold feeling of dread that stole over him in that moment. "I think if you just let me explain.. you." he tried again. "Why don't you explain it to someone that might be able to actually help you?" he snapped, pointing to Marlena who had just walked in the door. Sonny may as well have called him crazy. Once again he felt like he fell just short of adequate.

He and sonny were sitting in the coffee shop, back when it was just a coffee shop before Sonny went broke trying to turn it into the club… they were still broken up, from the fallout of the would be wedding and his paternity announcement. "I guess I thought I couldn't have the baby and you, so I chose you." he said. "You were gonna give up your baby for me?" Sonny had asked disbelieving. "Yeah that's how much I love you." His heart still dropped when he thought about all he had been willing to give up for Sonny. If he had been expecting some huge show of sympathy or shock or compassion (he really was) he was sadly mistaken, there was none of that. He bared his soul that day, not that it had made one tiny bit of difference. Not that it should surprise him, Sonny had already been moving on hadn't he, a few days before that he had seen Sonny leaving the coffee shop with Brian, and they had looked pretty comfortable with each other.

They moved in together, it was almost time for the baby and he was getting ready to quit school and get a job. Gabi was gonna need help with the baby and being a student just wasn't gonna cut it. "I asked My Grandma Kate for a job." Will said as they ate dinner. Sonny looked at him with wide eyes, "What? No, you need to stay in school, let me support the family. I want to do this for you Will." Sonny had said. His heart had practically melted that night. It had been so sweet, and it had endeared Sonny to him, it was one of the rare elusive moments when he had felt loved and treasured. Left him feeling like he could never have asked for a better life partner. Now he couldn't help but wonder if that hadn't been Sonny's way of exerting just a little control over him, of keeping him close and dependent.

It sure was funny how dying changed your perspective on things, opened your eyes to things you would have never noticed before. He felt like he had been in culture shock since the memories had come back. He was seeing things in a whole new light, and wondering how he had missed so many things back then.

Like how he had fallen so hard for Paul way back then. It may have started as an affair, but it hadn't ended that way. He was head over hills for him in the end. Even back then Paul had valued his opinions, wanted to know his thoughts on silly subjects, how long had it been since Sonny had wanted his opinion on anything, let alone the life changing decisions he was making for both of them. Sonny had put two and two together for himself when the article had come out, and he guilted him into ending things with Paul, and giving their marriage one more chance, conveniently it had been just before he announced he was leaving town, another one of Sonny's punishments.

Sonny had raked him over the coals for cheating with Paul, he had made him feel so ashamed. Not that he shouldn't have been ashamed. But dammit Sonny had made no mention that he had cheated, maybe he didn't technically sleep with Paul, but he did kiss him, and he was constantly with Paul while Will was out of town. Yeah Sonny probably thought that he didn't know about that, but he did, and emotional cheating, well that's still cheating. So yeah, Maybe ashamed was exactly what he should have been feeling, not for cheating but for not having the guts to tell Sonny they were done, and taking his chance at happiness with Paul.

But he hadn't, he had bowed to what Sonny wanted and ended things with Paul, then ironically he had been the one pleading with Sonny to give their love one more chance, He could do better, he was worthy, and he would prove it, if Sonny would just give him the chance. But Sonny had practically ignored him, pushing him farther and farther away, making him feel like he wasn't worthy of love. Then he had coldly announced that he was leaving town.

Looking back, proving that he had been good enough for Sonny was like his mantra, he had lived his life to that end, until Paul, Paul had saved him from that even if it was only for a for a short time. When he had been with Paul, he only had to be Will. There were faults and Paul knew it, and he hadn't cared about any of them. But Sonny had, sometimes he seemed to take pleasure in pointing them out.

He was determined that Paul wasn't going to go through that. Even if they didn't end up together, Paul should be with someone that could love him unconditionally, and Sonny was not that person.


	6. Chapter 6

"Hey Will." Sonny said when he opened the door to the Kiriakis mansion to find Will on the steps. "What are you doing here?" he asked.

"I wondered if you had time to talk." he asked. "You said I should come to you if I had questions, so here I am."

"Oh, yeah of course, come on in." he said. He stepped aside and let Will in the door, closing it behind him.

"I'm glad you took me up on my offer." Sonny said. "Can I get you anything?" he asked.

When Will shook his head no, Sonny motioned to the stairs, "Okay, we can go upstairs where we can have more privacy." he said.

"Uh sure" Will said. Following him, wondering what was going through Sonny's mind.

Sonny stopped in front of his bedroom door and swung it open, letting Will walk in before him.

"Make yourself at home." Sonny said indicating the bed. He went over and sat down, and waited for Will to join him.

Will avoided the bed and took the only chair in the room, clasping his hands in front of him nervously.

"So… what did you want to ask me?" Sonny said.

"Tell me about us…" Will said leaving it open ended, there was so much to tell, so many questions he could ask.

"What do you want to know?" Sonny asked.

"Everything." Will said simply. "But I want to know the good and the bad." he cautioned.

"Okay… fair enough, We first met when you were with still with Gabi, she was your girlfriend. I fell for you right away, we became friends and then we fell in love."

"Sounds like a fairytale, like everything was perfect.." Will said. "But nothing is ever perfect right?" he asked rhetorically. So were you my first boyfriend?"

""Yeah." Sonny said. "Your only boyfriend." he boasted.

"So I never experimented, not with anyone, I went from being straight, to being with you?" Will asked.

Sonny shook his head, "I guess you could look at it like that, We fell in love pretty quickly."

"Did I have a hard time coming out?" Will asked.

"Yeah, a little." Sonny confessed. "But when you made the decision to come out you never turned back."

Well that wasn't true, Will thought, he had struggled terribly for weeks. Hated himself, hated what he was, hated that he couldn't change it. It took him quite a while to accept himself.

"Hmmm" he said. "So we got together and things were amazing and then we got married, just like that."

"Well, there were a couple of speed bumps. We had a rough few weeks when I found out that you are Arianna's dad. You always did have a flair for the dramatics, you are a lot like your mom in that sense." Sonny said.

"What happened?" Will asked, trying not to get offended at the jab about being like his mother, he didn't appreciate being compared to her.

"You stood up in the middle of Gabi's wedding and just announced it." Sonny said. "Like you were talking about the weather."

"That must have been shocking." Will said. "Since I am assuming that we were together by then."

"Yeah, we were together, in fact that morning, the morning of the wedding, I had asked you to move in with me." Sonny said. "And you said yes, you were so excited to move in you went and got some of your things right then, it was pretty cute."

"Wow.." Will said. "You must be a saint, I don't know how I could ever forgive anyone for something like that."

"It was hard." Sonny agreed. "But we made it through."

"Why did you, forgive me I mean?" Will asked curiously. "Why didn't you just try to move on?"

"Because I love you Will." Sonny said. "I didn't want to live without you. There could never be anyone else for me."

Another lie, there had been the time Sonny spent with Brian, he thought. They had gotten pretty cozy during the time he and Sonny had been separated. He pushed that thought away and continued on. "So was I so overjoyed that we were back together, that I proposed to you on the spot?" Will asked.

"Umm no." Sonny said chuckling, "I proposed a couple months later and you turned me down flat."

"Why?" Will asked confused. "If things were so perfect why wouldn't I jump at the chance to marry you?"

"Something about not wanting to get married because of your mom and all of her failed marriages." Sonny said. "You were scared."

"So I wasn't ready to get married?" Will said, it was more of a statement than a question, the thought of marriage had terrified the hell out of him. "So how did we end up that way?"

"Eventually you came around, succumbed to my considerable charms." Sonny said smiling. "And when you did, it was your idea to get married."

"Didn't you find it odd that I was totally against it, and then all the sudden I was the one dragging you to the altar?" Will asked. .

"Should I have? Sonny snapped, "All I knew was I loved you, and I wanted to get married."

Sonny was getting edgy, but still he continued on, determined to get at some truth. "So you coerced me into marrying you, before I was ready, Maybe that is why I cheated." Will said. "Do you think that could be true?"

"I have no idea Will, and I didn't coerce you into doing anything you didn't want to do." Sonny said angrily.

"Then why did I cheat on you?" Will asked.

"How should I know?" Sonny said, getting exasperated. He shoved his hand through his hair. "What are you getting at?"

"You said we were happy." Will stated. "But I can't see myself just sleeping with someone else for the hell of it, I feel like I am a pretty loyal person. Were we having any problems?"

"I thought we were happy, Will." he said. "You were a little obsessed with your work, I guess I should have been more suspicious of that, but I trusted you." he said. "Why all the questions all of the sudden."

Hmm, Sonny was getting defensive. And surprise, surprise, as per usual everything was his fault…

"I'm just trying to figure things out, trying to figure out who I was, what kind of person I was, maybe I don't want to be that person anymore." Will said. "I don't mean to make you uncomfortable."

"I'm not uncomfortable." Sonny said. "I just don't think you need to know all this stuff yet, There will be plenty of time for you to learn about all of this later, this stuff doesn't matter, not really. "

On what planet did this stuff not matter, he thought. "Okay, that's fine, I know this is hard for you." Will said aloud, moving to get up. "I can just go and see Paul, I am sure he has more answers, I can see this was a mistake."

"No wait." Sonny said, standing and pacing in front of the door. "Go ahead and ask me anything you want to know. You don't need to go to Paul for anything, in fact you need to stay away from him."

"Why?" Will asked curiously. "You afraid I am going to sleep with him again?"

Sonny's eyes flashed with anger. "Paul seduced you, he pressured you into sleeping with him. Somehow he knew you were my husband and he was trying to get back at me for not coming back to him." Sonny said. "I am not going to let that happen again. I won't let him put you through that again."

"Oh, so it wasn't my fault?" Will said. "I was just a victim of circumstance." he asked.

"Pretty much." Sonny said. "I just want to protect you Will.

Will scoffed of the inside, protect me, or make sure that I don't find out he is lying to me, he wondered "That's a relief, I was worried that I had been the one chasing Paul." he said. "I mean, I find him extremely attractive now, I can't imagine it was any different back then."

"Look, Paul took advantage of you." Sonny said angrily, "and I could see him doing it again, but it would just be to get back at me. He thinks that by sleeping with you it will hurt me." Sonny said. "Please promise me you will stay away from him." he pleaded.

"I'm sorry." Will said getting up, "I can't promise you that. I like Paul, a lot, he understands me and I have spent time with him since I have been back in Salem and he isn't taking advantage of anyone, least of all me." he looked at his watch, "Oh I didn't realize it had gotten so late, I should go." he said, he had to get out of there before he started calling Sonny on his bull shit.

Sonny stepped out of his way and opened the door for him. He moved to the side and then followed Will from the room, "Are you sure you have to go, you wanna go grab a bite to eat or something?" he asked when they got to the foyer.

"No, thanks though, I have some things to get done this afternoon." he said. "See you around."

"Okay." Sonny agreed, "Let me know if you have anymore questions. I am happy to answer them."

Will nodded and continued out the door. Yeah Sonny was happy to answer them with lies and half truths… he thought ruefully.

Will went over to the pub and ordered himself a club sandwich and fries to go. He wanted to find a quiet spot so that he could think things through. He took his food and walked down by the river. When he found a spot that looked appealing he sat down and opened the box. He really wasn't all that hungry but he picked at his food as he replayed the conversation with Sonny in his mind.

He had made the right decision going to see Sonny today. It was a test, and Sonny had failed. He wanted to know how much of the truth Sonny was willing to tell him, and there wasn't a lot of truth in his accounts of their past.

Sonny did a good job of painting them as the perfect couple. Sunshine and roses that's what their life has been, at least to hear Sonny tell their story. There hadn't been many cross words between them. But there had been a lot of them,

Sonny said that he took him back after the wedding fiasco because He "couldn't live without him." that was a joke. Truth be told, Will still didnt know why Sonny had taken him back. Things had been good for a while, but that hadn't lasted.

And the whole marriage thing, Sonny hadn't admitted it, but yeah he had coerced him, pressured him at every turn. He even made him feel like maybe there was something wrong with him since he didn't want to get married. So again, he had done whatever Sonny wanted to prove that he was worthy of his love, that he could make him happy.

Perhaps the most enlightening part of the whole exchange though had been when he had said that Paul had seduced him, taken advantage of him… he had wanted to ask so badly, if he really believed that, then why would he have been with Paul, he had been two seconds away from being married to Paul himself. So had Paul took advantage of him too, pressures him? It didn't make any sense. He kicked himself for not asking that very question.

Sonny had lied, straight up lied to his face when he had asked if they were having problems… problems, nope no problems at all except he was work obsessed. There was not one word about Sonny's jealousy, the money issues, the club falling through, or the constant arguing. Yeah he would say they had problems… more than a couple too. Why wouldn't he just tell the truth, there is nothing wrong with having issues, but that wouldn't fit in with Sonny's perfect life.

He had really had to bite his tongue when Sonny twisted everything to make it look like it was all about him. It was like he wanted him to believe that Paul couldn't be attracted to him for who he was, he had to have a special reason to want to sleep with him. He wondered if that was how Sonny really felt about him or if he just wanted Will to think that was true, another control tactic maybe? Who knew.

"Will?" a female voice called out behind him, pulling him from his thoughts. "What are you doing out here by yourself?" she asked.

"Oh Hey." Will said, scrambling up to give his Grandma Kate an awkward hug.

"Just thinking about stuff." Will said shrugging his shoulders.

"I used to come here to think too." She said. "You thinking about anything special?"

"Not really." Will lied smoothly. "Mostly just thinking about what I want to do with my life now that I am back here."

"Have you come up with any ideas?" she asked.

"I don't know, from what I hear I used to be a pretty decent reporter." he said, "Maybe I will see if I can get a job with the paper."

"That's a wonderful idea." Kate said.

"I also have to find a place to live." Will said.

"I thought you were staying with Marlena." Kate asked.

"Oh I am." Will said. "But I can't stay there forever." he said.

"Are you uncomfortable there?" she asked. "Because if you are, you can stay with me." she offered.

"No, nothing like that." he said. "It's just you know, I need space and privacy and…"

"Oh yes of course." Kate said. "I can understand that, eventually you are going to have a private life. Speaking of that, how are things with Sonny, are you two working things out?" she asked.

"Things with Sonny are about the same as they have always been." Will said.

"What do you mean by that?" Kate asked looking at him expectantly.

Damn… he muttered under his breath… "I just mean you know since I have been back here, well before even, back in Memphis, he is constantly pushing me to remember who he is… what we are… and I just don't." he covered.

"Things will get better Will, I am sure of it." she said. "In the meantime, I may have a solution to one of your problems."

"What's that?" Will asked.

"Countess W has an apartment on permanent lease that we have used on occasion for shoots. It is yours if you want it, for as long as you need it. She said.

"Are you serious?" he asked. "That's amazing.. yes of course I want to use it, just until I am on my feet though."

Kate fished around in her purse and came out with a set of keys. "Here you go," she said, "it is on the 4th floor in the building over by the park. Move in anytime you like." she said.

"Thanks Grandma." he said hugging her tightly.

"You're very welcome," she said. "Now I have to go, I have a meeting."

"Bye Grandma." he said as he watched her walk off.

Hmmm he thought, this day just keeps getting more and more interesting. Paul also lived on the 4th floor in the building over by the park. They were going to be right down the hall from one another. He wondered briefly how Paul would feel about that. He already knew Sonny was going to blow a blood vessel, and that was probably erring on the side of caution.

He picked up the box with his barely touched meal and dropped it into the trash. Then turned and jogged toward home, well towards Marlena and John's condo. He had to break the news to her, he hoped that she understood. He really was comfortable with her, but he just needed some space, some room to breathe, without someone asking if he was okay, or if he needed anything all the time... and maybe if he was lucky he would find more time to spend with Paul.


	7. Chapter 7

Will looked around the room, checking to make sure that he had all of his things. It only took a few boxes to hold his meager belongings. He really hadn't brought anything from Memphis except for his clothes and his laptop. Everything else he had there had merely been props for the lie he was living.

Most of what he had gained since he had been back in Salem had been memento's designed to help him get his memory back, given to him by various people. A picture here, a card there, his old writing journal, his favorite CD, a pair of concert ticket stubs, Sami had even saved his favorite shirt. It was nothing special, but she had brought it back to him folded neatly in a ziplock bag. Funny, the things that a grieving person would hold on to.

For the first time through the whole ordeal, he thought about what they must have all went through thinking he was dead for so long. How hard it must have been for those that loved him. He suddenly found himself struggling with emotion.

"You about packed?" Marlena asked, knocking on the door behind him, looking around, taking in the empty room, "That didn't take long."

"Yeah." he said, wiping his eyes, trying not to blush. "There wasn't much to pack. Being dead really helps you clear out the clutter." he quipped.

Marlena smiled, "I'm glad you find it funny young man." she said.

"Well laughing is better than crying right?" he said. "Sometimes, most of the time actually, I feel like crying."

"We all have those moments." Marlena said. "You have been through a lot my precious boy, it's okay to be emotional from time to time."

"Thanks." He said. "He turned and threw himself into her arms, uncontrollable sobs shaking his body.

"Oh." she said, surprised at the sudden contact. Will had definitely been more standoffish since he had been back. He hadn't really been receptive to being touched. She cradled him to her. "I love you, Will." she said, unable to keep her own tears from falling.

They stayed that way for a long time, When they separated he wiped his face with his sleeve, embarrassed. "I love you too grandma."

"So are sure you want to move out in the big wide world alone?" she teased.

"Grandma, it's a couple miles across town. I think I will be fine." he said.

"I'm sure you will." she said. "I just am not sure I want to let you go."

"Aren't you and John ready to have your place back to yourselves?" he asked.

"Not at all." she said. "I have loved every second of having you here with me."

"Well, I am not leaving town, so we will be able to hang out." he said.

Marlena chuckled at that. "Not many young men like to "hang out" with their grandmothers." she teased.

"Well then not many of them have a cool grandma like I do." he teased back.

"Come here you." she said hugging him again. "Promise me you will come to me if you need anything? she asked. "And I do mean anything, if you want to talk, or just don't want to be alone."

"Promise." Will said. Hugging her back.

When they broke apart he stacked a couple boxes on top of one another and carried them out into the den. "Need some help with that kid?" John asked.

"I think I can manage." Will said. "I just have a few boxes and I called a cab."

"I would have driven you over." John said.

"I know." Will said, "But this is easier, and I didn't want to put you to any trouble.

His phone buzzed in his pocket. "My cab is here." Will said. "I should hurry."

He picked up the boxes and John grabbed the two suitcases of clothes that were already there. "I will walk you out." he said.

They got to the cab and loaded Wills things into the cab. "I will run up and get the other few boxes." John said. When he came back down Will took those and stowed them in the back seat. "Thank you." Will said. "For everything."

"No thanks needed." John said. "We are just thrilled that you are back. Doc was a mess with you gone and the truth is we all missed you."

Will nodded. "Me too." he said, and for the first time he found that he really meant it.

"Listen Kid." John said. "You know you are welcome to stay with us as long as you want but I understand that you need some room to figure out who you are and who you wanna be. It's gonna take you a while to get on your feet, and that's a fact…This should help." he said pulling a stack of bills from his pocket and extending it toward Will.

"Uh huh, I can't take your money." Will said pushing it away. "I will be fine."

"Take it son." John said. "Call it a loan, or a gift of love, or whatever you need to call it… but take it."

Eventually Will took the money and shoved it into his pocket. "Thanks again." he said, as he got into the cab.

It was a short ride to the apartment building. Will got out and pulled his boxes from the back seat. The cabbie opened the trunk and sit his other belongings on the curb. Will paid him, picked up as much as he could, and started in the door. He would come back for the rest… surely it would be fine on the curb right?

"Will?" Paul called as he walked up the sidewalk, "What are you doing here?" he asked… Will chuckled, he seemed to get asked that question a lot.

"Umm, moving in actually." he said.

"In here?" Paul asked indicating the building, looking puzzled.

"Yeah on the fourth floor, we are gonna be neighbors." he said.

"How did that happen?" Paul asked, curiously.

"My grandma Kate Is letting me use the Countess W apartment." he said. "I just felt like I needed some space, and she offered so..."

"Does Sonny know?" Paul asked dreading the answer.

"Not yet." Will said. "He isn't going to like it."

"That's putting it mildly." Paul agreed. "Can I help you carry this up?" he asked, pointing to the boxes.

"That would be awesome." Will said. "You don't mind?"

Paul waved him off and picked up the boxes. Will held the door open for him to enter the building first. They rode up on the elevator in silence and then exited onto the fourth floor.

"Which apartment?" Paul asked.

"Umm, give me a sec." Will said putting the suitcases down and pulling the keys from his pocket. He looked at the keychain, "Apartment 418" he said.

"This way." Paul said leading the way down the hall. He stopped at the door and then waited for Will to open it. Together they carried the boxes and suitcases into the apartment.

It wasn't very big, just a studio apartment with the smallest kitchen he had ever seen, but it was furnished nicely, and it was a place that he could feel free to be himself. He wouldn't feel any pressure here to be the Will that everyone remembered . He really didn't want to be that person anymore.

Will sat the suitcases on the bed, and took it all in.

"Where do you want these?" Paul said holding up the boxes, reminding Will that he was still holding them.

"Oh sorry, Just there on the table is fine." Will said. "Thanks for helping me. When I get settled maybe you can come over for a couple of beers or something." he said. "As a thank you ofcourse."

Paul held up his hands. "No thanks necessary." he said. "Besides I didn't really do anything."

"Okay, so then maybe you can come over for beers because I want to spend time with you." Will said, raising his eyebrows, waiting for an answer.

"I don't know if that is a good idea." Paul said.

"Why?" Will asked. "We were doing pretty good getting along before Sonny showed up the other day."

"Yeah, maybe too good." Paul said remembering where things had been headed before Sonny had knocked. No telling how far they would have gotten. "Sonny wasn't overjoyed to find us together, he doesn't want us to be anywhere near each other."

Will walked toward Paul, stopping right in front of him. "You really need to stop thinking so much about what Sonny wants, and think about what you want." he said placing his hand on Paul's chest. He looked into Paul's eyes, "What do you want Paul?" he asked.

"I umm… " Paul licked his lips nervously, his heart was racing in his chest, from the close proximity to Will. "I don't know." he said.

"Hmmm." Will said. "Maybe we will have to figure that out together. He said winking.

"I have to go." Paul said. "I will see you around." he said turning, practically running out the door.

Will sat down on the edge of the bed and watched the door close behind Paul. This was going to be interesting. Paul was so skittish but Will knew that whether Paul wanted to admit it or not, the attraction was still there. He just had to find a way to make Paul see that Sonny was just keeping him hanging on as a backup plan.

Four days later. Gabi brought Arianna to the park for a play date with him. "Thanks for bringing her." he said, as he watched her run off to climb to the tip top of the jungle gym.

"You can see her as much as you want Will, she is your daughter too. You two have a lot of catching up to do." Gabi assured him.

"I know, I am just worried that I will push her too hard, too fast ." he confided.

"You don't have to worry about that Will, our little girl worships you." she said.

"Swing me daddy." she called, running up grabbing him by the hand.

He picked her up and sat her in the seat. He began pushing her gently.

"Higher…. Higher" she giggled.

Will obliged pushing her higher. "Like that?" he asked.

"Yeah!" she called, holding on tightly.

"Will, I mean it, we are so glad that you are back and she doesn't have to grow up without her dad." Gabi said from her place beside him. "She loves you soo much."

"I love her too." Will said "I am glad that I don't have to miss out on her growing up.

"Look, I'm going to go and give you two some time together." she said. "Can you bring her home later on?" she asked.

"Of course." Will agreed.

He watched her walk out of the park and then slowed the swing to a stop and helped Arianna down.

"Hey baby girl." he said. "What do you wanna do now?" he asked, picking her up.

"Slide?" she said.

"Slide it is.." Will said. He spent the next couple of hours chasing her around the park, sliding, swinging, twirling on the merry go round.. he caught her and tickled her side… "You wore me out." he teased. "Daddy is tired and hungry.. are you hungry?" he asked.

"Me hungry too." she agreed.

"I am hungry too." Will reminded her. "Let's go get something to eat."

"Okay!" she agreed.

He took her hand and they walked out of the park and over to the square. "What do you want to eat?" he asked.

"Ice Cream!" she shouted enthusiastically.

"Oh no… " Will laughed, "you aren't getting me in trouble with your mom. No ice cream before dinner."

Arianna poured. "After dinner?" she asked hopefully.

"We'll see." he said. "Let's see, do you want a hamburger?" he asked.

She crinkled her nose and shook her head. "Uh huh." she said.

"Hot dog?" Will tried again.

"Yuck." she said. "Don't like that."

"Salad?" he asked.

"Noo Daddy…." she giggled. "I want chicken nuggets."

"Oooh that's right!" Will exaggerated. "I forgot those are your favorite." he said.

They made it to the pub. He looked around. It was pretty quiet in there for it to be early evening. They took the small table in the corner. Will ordered her chicken nuggets and fries. He could not resist ordering her a chocolate shake. "That's our secret, okay?" he said to her when her eyes lit up. She nodded solemnly. Then he turned back to the waitress and ordered himself a salad and a glass of tea.

"Daddy." Arianna said when they sat down.

"Yeah baby girl?" he asked. He could tell she had something on her mind.

"Are you going to move back home with Daddy Sonny?" she asked.

Will was taken aback, surprised by the question.

"Why do you ask?" he said looking at her warily. He wondered momentarily if Sonny had put her up to asking him that.

"Mommy said that you don't remember us, but that when you do, things will be like they were before.." she sniffled and wiped her nose on the back of her hand. "Before you died and went to heaven and Daddy Sonny went away on a long trip."

Will's heart shuddered in his chest. Of course Sonny had left them, and then he had died, of course she felt like they both left her. "Come here baby." he said pushing his chair back from the table. She came around and he picked her up, sat her in his lap and cuddled her against his chest. He kissed her forehead. "Daddy loves you soo much, you know that right?" he asked. She nodded yes against his chest. "Good….." he crooned. "And you know that I never wanted to leave you. Daddy would never leave you like that if he had a choice." she nodded against his chest . "I will always love you, no matter what, I don't have to live with Daddy Sonny to love you." he said.

"I know." she whispered. "But will you, don't you love Daddy Sonny?" she asked innocently.

Will held her quietly and thought about how he could explain this to such a young child.

"Yes, I do love Daddy Sonny." He said swallowing thickly. "You know how much I love mommy, I will always love Mommy because Mommy is our family. Mommy and I don't live together either, but that doesn't mean that we love you any less. We are a family, Me, You, Mommy, and Daddy Sonny, and we always will be that isn't going to change. But Daddy Sonny and I won't be living together anymore." he rubbed her back. "Do you understand?" he asked, pulling her back so that he could look at her.

"I think so." she said timidly.

He hugged her close. "I'm so sorry baby girl. Daddy has made a real mess out of your life so far." he whispered.

"It's okay daddy," she said putting her arms around his neck, "I am just sad when we aren't together." she said.

"Do you remember when Daddy Sonny was gone on the trip across the big ocean, when he was gone for a very long time?" he asked her.

Remember we missed him so much and when you would get sad and miss him the most, we always sang a song to make you feel better. Do you remember that?" he asked.

"Yes." she said squirming closer to him.

"Do you remember what song we always sang?" he asked.

"The Itsy Bitsy Spider." she said softly.

"Yes!" Will said, "we sang that song soo many times. And it always made you feel better. And when Daddy Sonny came home, he didn't love you any less did he?" he asked. She shook her head no. "So when you get sad and miss me, you just sing out song, and remember that I love you very much okay?" he asked.

"I didn't see him for a long time." she whispered, "Then you left me too."

"I know baby, I am so sorry, I didn't want to leave you." he said fighting back tears. "But Daddy Sonny came back and took care of you didn't he?." he asked.

"I only saw Daddy Sonny a little before he left me again." she cried. "Nobody sang Itsy Bitsy Spider with me while you were in heaven. Mommy took care of me, only mommy, but she was so sad all the time."

"What do you mean before he left again?" he asked. Anger clawed at his insides. How dare Sonny just leave her alone in her grief.

"Daddy Sonny went on another trip across the ocean." she said. "He was gone forever. I don't want you or Daddy Sonny to go away again." she began to cry in earnest, just as the waitress put her food on the table.

"Hey Hey…. Shhhhhh." he comforted her. "That is never going to happen. I PROMISE YOU I AM NOT GOING ANYWHERE EVER AGAIN!" he said. He held her until her sobs subsided. Sonny was going to pay for this. He had trusted him and Sonny had betrayed him.

He pulled her plate over to his side of the table and offered her a French fry. She accepted it and took a small bite. He kissed her head and held her as she calmed down and slowly ate her food.

"Is there something wrong with your salad?" the waitress asked when she came to check on them.

Will looked at the plate, he hadn't touched it. "Not at all, I just lost my appetite." he said.

"If you like I can box it up for you." she said. "You can take it home."

"That would be great." Will said. He reached across the table and picked up Arianna's shake. He held the straw to her lips so that she could take a sip, then the took a swallow himself.

While he waited for her to eat, he pulled out his phone. He opened his contacts found Sonny's name and opened a blank text message. "You and I need to talk tonight." he typed, the mansion always seemed to have a revolving door and he didn't necessarily want an audience for this conversation so he added the address to his apartment and pressed send.


	8. Chapter 8

Will paced around his apartment. He was so angry he couldn't sit down. He tried to plan out what he wanted to say, but he was so furious there was not telling what may come out of his mouth. Arianna was the one thing he had never had a second thought about when it came to Sonny. Sonny had always loved her as his own… or so he thought.

Finally, there was a knock on the door.

"Will." Sonny said, when Will opened the door. His voice was tight with what Will recognized as anger. But he didn't give a damn about whatever maybe bothering Sonny.

Will didn't open his mouth, didn't trust himself to do so yet. He just opened the door further and indicated that he should come in.

"I see you and Paul are new neighbors." he said snidely, as he walked in. "That must be convenient for you."

"That's not what you are here to discuss." Will said, hostility poured out of him. "We have more important issues than who lives in this building."

Sonny looked at him surprised. "What's wrong?" He asked. He wasn't sure what to make of it, he had never heard Will sound so angry before.

"You son of a bitch." Will ground out. "I trusted you, with the most precious thing in my life, and you betrayed that trust."

"What are you talking about?", Sonny asked confused. "You are the one.."

"NO!" Will was practically shouting. His body shaking with his anger. "I trusted you to take care of my daughter, and you left her after I was murdered?" He accused. "How could you leave her, and just go back to your life, like nothing had changed... after something so traumatizing for her?"

"I came home Will, I told you that, I was one day too late, but I came." Sonny said. "If I had just came back one day earlier, then you would have never been murdered." Sonny said. "Of course I was here for Arianna."

"For how long?" Will asked. "A few days? A week? Where were you when she needed you the most?" He ground out. "When she cried herself to sleep at night begging for her daddy."

"I couldn't stay here Will, can't you see that?" Sonny said. "This was a lonely dark place for me without you."

"You're gonna have to help me out here." Will spat, "When you left me and Arianna the first time you said that you needed space, seemingly you left town because I was here, now you are trying to tell me that you couldn't stay here without me…. Which is it?" He asked disgust coloring his voice.

"I just couldn't Will." Sonny said his voice cracking, "It was too hard, everywhere I looked there were memories of you."

"How hard do you think it was for Arianna? Will cried. "She lost both of her dads."

"Gabi, took excellent care of her until I came back." Sonny said. "Besides I had obligations, People counting on me, things that I couldn't get out of. I couldn't help being gone, anymore than you could." Sonny said.

Will looked at him like he had lost his mind. "Are you really comparing me being murdered, brought back to life, flown across the country, and brainwashed into believing that I was someone else, to you ignoring your responsibilities, deciding you were tired of playing Daddy to my baby girl?" he asked his voice rising even more. He was shouting somewhere near the top of his lungs.

"No Will." Sonny defended. "That's not what I am saying at all. I will always be Arianna's daddy, she is my little girl too, I delivered her. I am just trying to say that I was in no shape to be taking care of Arianna, I was heartbroken."

"Don't give me that crap. Ari was heartbroken too, you should have been there for her, comforted her and let her know that she was still important to you. Was that too much for her to ask?" Will snapped, "MY GOD! Can't you ever put anyone else's needs above your own?" he asked.

"Of course, Arianna comes first always." Sonny said. "I love her, you know that."

"I don't know anything anymore." Will said. "I think you need to leave. I can't talk about this anymore with you right now." he said.

"Will, we need to talk about this." Sonny said. "Where is this coming from? Gabi? Who even told you that I left town after your funeral?" he asked. He swore to God if it was Paul he was going to kill him.

"Who told me? That's what you are worried about?" Will sneered, "My daughter, that's who."

Sonny took a couple of steps toward Will, "Let me explain." he said reaching out for his hand.

Will stepped back until his back was against the wall, he jerked his hand out of Sonny's reach, "Don't touch me." he shrieked. "I asked you to leave."

Sonny held his hands up in surrender. "Okay." he said, stopping in his tracks. "I'm sorry.," he said. "I hope we can talk about his more when you have had a chance to calm down."

As soon as the door closed behind Sonny, Will slid down the wall and pulled his knees up to his chest. He let go of all the pent up emotion inside him. The sobs racked his body.

All he could think about was Arianna, thinking both of her dads left her, that they didn't want her anymore. He could not imagine what she must have went through, how she must have felt. It made him physically sick.

There was a soft knock on the door… he didn't want to deal with anyone right now. He stayed quiet hoping they would go away.

Another knock, a little louder this time. Will still remained silent.

The door cracked open. "Will, you okay?" Paul said when his head popped in.

Will's eyes met his from his position on the floor. He wiped his eyes with the back of his arm. "I'm fine." Will said.

"Umm, I can see that you're not." Paul said, coming in and shutting the door behind him. "I just saw Sonny running out of here like the place was on fire. What happened?"

Will opened his mouth to answer, and then closed it again. What was he supposed to say to Paul, of course Paul knew everything that happened while he was "dead." Besides why would Paul want to listen to him whine about things he can do nothing about now…

Paul came over and took a seat on the floor beside Will, they were shoulder to shoulder. "Look I don't want to pry." he said. "But I am a pretty good listener, and I wanna be there for you, the way you were for me."

Will looked at him quizzically. "When I was writing the article?" he asked. "I'm pretty sure they call that research." he said wryly.

Paul shrugged, "Yeah you were after a story, but you really listened to me, you gave me some great advice, you helped me feel better about myself and turned what was one of the darkest times in my life into something to look forward to, so I wanna do that for you." he said.

"Thank you." Will stuttered. "I appreciate that. But I am okay really."

"Come on Will, I am smarter than that, let me help you." Paul said bumping his shoulder against Wills. "Talk to me."

"Fine," He said, "I just found out that Sonny left town again after my funeral. He left our daughter alone without a father." Will said.

"Oh." Paul said, he winced, "That must have made you angry."

"You have no idea." Will agreed. "But it makes me sad too. My baby girl lost both of her father's, Sonny should have stayed here and been with her."

"Why didn't he?" Paul asked. He already knew the answer that Sonny had given him, but he wondered what he had told Will.

"He gave me some bull crap answer about it being too hard to be here without me." Will said.

"Sounds like you don't think that's true?" Paul observed.

"You know what I think." Will said. "I think Sonny had a guilty conscious about leaving me and Arianna. And that's why he couldn't be around here after I died. He filed for a legal separation from me, so obviously he wasn't overcome with love."

Paul nodded, "I was here and I remember that Sonny did feel incredibly guilty for not coming home sooner." he said. "But I don't think that's why he left again. I think being here without you, at least being alive, made him very sad, and he didn't want to feel that.

"But still Arianna needed him, he should have found a way to be here for her, even if it killed him, that is what parents do." Will said angrily, getting irritated because Paul was defending Sonny. Didn't he see what kind of man Sonny is.

"Woah." Paul said, "I didn't say what he did was right. I am merely saying that he did feel guilty when you died." he said. Will was really angry about this, and he had every right to be. But Paul wondered what brought this up tonight.

"When you died." Will thought about that for a second. The irony of the conversation was not lost on him, only in the town of Salem could people talk about their own deaths and funerals, and coming back from the dead with a straight face.

"Arianna told me that I went to heaven and left her and Her Daddy Sonny left her to go on a long trip." Will said. "How was she supposed to not feel unwanted?"

"I wish I had an answer for that Will." Paul said. "But I don't, you're right there is no excuse for him leaving her so soon after the funeral."

Will sat there quietly. He just felt numb on the inside.

Paul sat quietly giving him all the time he needed. He thought back to the day that Sonny had told him he was leaving town again. He had been so in love with Sonny back then. He had wanted to help Sonny through that terrible tragedy, but Sonny hadn't wanted his love then. But he had made it clear that he had wanted Paul to be there waiting for him when he got back, and he had been. It hadn't seemed like a betrayal to Will's memory back then, but now he saw it. He saw the way Sonny had been looking out for his own interests always.

"I just don't understand, how he could do it, ya know." Will whispered. "Just say goodbye and walk out of her life like she never mattered to him. I understood why he walked away from me, why he wanted to punish me, but she didn't deserve that."

Paul raised his arm and put it around Will's shoulders. "I know." He said. "But you are here now, and Arianna is gonna be fine. She is going to grow up knowing her father, she is a lucky little girl.

"Thanks." Will said laying his head over on Paul's shoulder.

They stayed like that for a long time. Until finally Will was getting uncomfortable, he pulled away and stood up.

Paul followed his example and stood up, stretching his limbs out.

Will went to the refrigerator and pulled out a bottle of water, he tossed one to Paul and got another for himself. He went over to the cabinet and pulled out a bottle of tylenol. He swallowed a couple with a gulp of water. "Sorry." he said, "I haven't gotten around to going to the store yet." Indicating the water bottles.

"Water is good, Have you eaten?" Paul asked. "You should probably eat something."

"Not hungry." Will said.

"You have a headache though right? I am assuming that is why you took the tylenol." Paul said."Lack of food will do that man. It can be brutal."

"Nah, It was an Emotional day." Will said. In the way of explanation.

"Let me just order a pizza." Paul said, "by the time it gets here you may change your mind."

Will didn't answer. It didn't matter to him one way or the other Normally he would be plotting a way to make the most of the time Paul was volunteering to spend with him, but he just couldn't make himself care at the moment. All he kept thinking was how much Arianna had suffered, needlessly, at least in part.

"Looks like you are all settled in." Paul said looking around the room noticing that most all of the boxes were gone or stashed away somewhere. He wanted to change the subject, bring Will back from that place that had him feeling so dejected.

"Huh?" Will asked, when he realized that Paul had been talking. "I'm sorry, I didn't hear you."

Paul motioned to the room. "Looks like you got everything unpacked." he said again.

"Oh, yeah, well there wasn't much." Will agreed.

That's true Paul thought taking a closer look around the room. There wasn't a lot of personal things laying around. There were a couple pictures of Arianna and a couple more of Will and Arianna, A laptop on the small desk. His old journal lay open on top of the computer. The one he used to write notes in during his interviews for Sonix. And that was about all more or less.

Will remained quiet, it seemed he was a man of few words tonight. Paul wondered if he was blaming himself for getting killed, as if he had been given a choice in the matter.

"Some people would say you are lucky, not having any memories or feelings tying you to objects that compell you to hold onto them for memories sake." Paul said, trying again.

Will shrugged. "I guess." he said. "You have things you wish you could toss, I take it."

"Maybe." Paul said. "But I guess I am a sentimental guy."

"Nothing wrong with that." Will said giving him a small smile.

Paul smiled back at Will. There was the Will that had come back from Memphis. He had always liked Will before, had been attracted to him from the jump, but this new Will, more confident, open, and even more emotional…. Was gonna be the death of him.

Will had taken a seat on the bed, Paul moved to sit opposite of him but the knock on the door made him change direction. He opened the door and pulled some bills from his wallet. He handed them to the young delivery girl and took the box. "Thank you!" he said, before closing the door.

"Here we go." Paul said, sitting the pizza ceremoniously in the center of the bed and then sitting down so that he was facing Will. He opened the box and waited for Will to take a slice before taking his own.

They ate in virtual silence. Will ate the first slice and then took another when Paul opened the box for him. Mostly he picked over the second one, eating the good stuff and leaving the bread but at least he ate something.

After they were done. He looked over at Will, he was about to ask him if he wanted to watch some sports or something. Will didn't seem to have a TV but he had one in his room, he wasn't sure about leaving Will alone right now. Will looked like he was almost asleep sitting up. Paul went over put the leftovers in the refrigerator. "Okay." he said. "I can see you are dead on your feet. I am gonna go, so you can get some rest." he said, opening the door, about to walk out.

"Paul." Will called him back.

He turned to face Will. "Yeah?" he asked.

"Thank you… for caring." Will said. "Means a lot "

""Good night Will." Paul said, walking out the door and closed it behind him.


	9. Chapter 9

It was early evening, but Paul had been through a rough couple days. He laid awake in bed, thinking about how upset Will had been the last time he saw him, and how he himself had felt about that. He hadn't been prepared for the feelings that it had stirred in him, and he certainly hadn't expected to want to comfort him like he had.

Will had probably thought he was nuts insisting that he eat, ordering pizza, and not leaving until he ate. But there was something about Will that night, he seemed soo…. vulnerable, and he just couldn't leave until he knew for sure that he was alright.

Somehow over the last few days he had miraculously been able to ignore the compulsion to call Will or stop by to see him. But that didn't mean that he hadn't been thinking about him almost every minute. There was one thing that kept replaying in his mind, nagging at him.

Will had said that he knew why Sonny had left him the first time, understood that Sonny wanted to punish him, but Arianna didn't deserve that, which was definitely true. But Will had said "understood" and not "understand." He was talking in past tense, like he remembered… not present tense.

Paul shrugged it off, with how upset Will had been, how many people had pushed memories and photos at him, it was no wonder he had become confused. He was just overthinking all of this, letting his imagination get the best of him.

His phone pinged indicating he had a text message. He picked it up from the bedside table and unlocked it.

"Are you home tonight?" it was from Will.

"Yes. Are you okay?" Paul answered back. Already throwing back the covers, preparing to get up and go to him.

Another ping from the phone. "Yeah, I am fine. Wanted to thank you again for the other night, I have beer or we could go out and grab a couple of drinks." was Will's response.

Paul thought about that… he typed, "Either one sounds great." then hesitated before he erased it. If he went to Will's apartment or Will came to his… there were too many possibilities of things that could, or probably would happen. "Drinks sound good, meet you downstairs in 10?"

"Perfect." Will sent back.

Paul got up and pulled on some jeans and a black shirt. He checked his hair in the mirror and found it to be decent, Then he swiped his wallet off of the table and picked up his keys. He walked out of the door, swinging it shut behind him.

When he stepped out of the building onto the sidewalk he knew he had made the right decision. Will was already there and waiting for him. He was looking exceptionally handsome tonight wearing pants that looked like they were tailored specifically for his body, and a shirt that brought out the color of his eyes. There was definitely no guarantee that things would have stopped at a beer or two.

"Hi." he said.

"Hi yourself!" Will said. "So where to?"

"Your choice." Paul said.

"Okay." Will said.

Together they walked in companionable silence through the square, on the way to Doug's place.

"So, I wanted to say thank you again." Will said. "I know I wasn't much fun the other night and you didn't have to stay with me."

"Will, I didnt do anything but order you a pizza." Paul said shrugging off his thanks.

"No you did more than that." Will said. "Whether you realize it or not, you really helped. If it hadn't been for you, I would still been sitting against that wall feeling sorry for myself."

"I know that you are going through a rough time right now." Paul said. "All of these things that people keep telling you, events they want you to remember, feelings that they want you to have, I honestly don't know how you are handling all the pressure."

Will shrugged, "I am getting by." he said.

"I can see that you are." Paul said, opening the door to Doug's place.

Will preceded him in and led the way to a table in the corner. They sat down just as a waitress came over and dropped some napkins on the table. "What can I get for you?" she asked. They ordered their drinks and she nodded and hurried off.

"So have you talked to Sonny since the other night?" Paul asked.

"Not a word." Will said. "And actually I am relieved, that I haven't."

"Why is that?" Paul asked.

"I just don't know if I can have another conversation with him, about Arianna, about our life before, before things got so screwed up." Will said.

"Before you slept with me?" Paul asked.

"What?" Will said. "No, that's not what I meant."

"Well that's when things got so messed up for you right? When you wrote the article about me, and well you know the rest of the story.

"Actually no, I don't." Will said. "But I don't want to know, not right now. The past is the past. I am beginning to feel like it is better left dead and buried."

"So you just want to start over?" Paul asked shocked.

Will shrugged, "Why not?" he asked. "It makes more sense than reliving everything that went wrong in my life. Doesn't it?"

"If that's the way you feel, then sure it does." Paul agreed.

"I just keep thinking that you and I, whatever we are calling this " he said gesturing between them, "would not have been possible before I died, or almost died, I guess, seeing as how I was such a dick to you." Will said. "And since I kinda like whatever this is… I am okay with the past staying where it belongs…. In the past.

Paul grinned across the table at him. "You know what they say… flattery will get you everywhere."

"Oh!" Will wagged his eyebrows at Paul. "Is that so?" he asked.

"It could be." Paul teased. "Guess we will have to wait and see."

Will beamed at him. "Guess so."

Paul actually blushed at the flirtatious look dancing in Will's eyes.

The waitress came unnoticed and put the drinks down in front of them, quickly taking her leave.

"So I heard, you are looking for a job, any luck?" Paul asked.

"Not yet." Will said. "I mean, I guess I know plenty of people that will give me a job, if I ask." he said, "just not anything that I really want to do, and besides I really want to make it on my own you know, get a job based on my own merit."

"I completely understand." Paul said.

"Trouble is, the only thing I know how to do is be a bartender." Will said.

"That's not true." Paul said. "You are an excellent journalist."

"I used to be, you mean." Will said. "What if I am not that person anymore."

"I know you still have it in you, you can do this. " Paul said. "You just have to get out there and be confident. Go after what you want."

Wills eyes twinkled with mischief. "I kind of thought I was." he said, reaching across the table and covering Paul's hand with his own.

Paul chuckled, "Not what I meant." he said, but that didn't stop him from turning his hand over and twining their fingers together.

"Same concept though." Will said.

"Back to my point." Paul said. "You need a job in journalism, maybe back at Sonix?"

"Oh no… " Will said. "Not back to a place where they want me to lie and manipulate people."

"Okay then, what about the Salem Spectator?" Paul asked.

Will nearly choked on the sip of drink he had just taken. "Yeah, like that is gonna happen." Will said.

"Why wouldn't it?" Paul said.

"Ummm, maybe because Sonny's mom is the owner of the paper." Will said. "Honestly why would she ever hire me?"

"Because if she doesn't another paper will… in a heartbeat, and she isn't going to want to lose you to the competition." Paul countered.

"I don't know…" Will groaned. "Maybe I should just stick to being a bartender."

"No,no,no…" Paul said smiling, "I am not gonna let you do that, especially not when there is a job that is perfect for you. YOU Will Horton are going for it." he said grinning.

"Okay, Okay." Will relented. "I will give it a shot."

"Can I get you another round?" the waitress asked stopping by their table.

"Another drink?" Will asked.

"Sure." Paul said.

"Be right back." she said bouncing away from the table.

They spent another hour, lingering over drinks and chatting about everything under the sun, mostly about things that didn't matter.

"Anything else?" the waitress asked again, appearing at the edge of the table.

"Just the check." Paul said.

She sat it down on the table, and Paul picked it right up and handed it back to her along with his credit card.

"Hey!" Will said. "I invited you, this was my thank you to you. I was going to pay."

"I got it." Paul said. "Since I am the only one gainfully employed at this table." he teased.

"Next time, it is my treat." Will said.

"Fair enough." Paul said, accepting the card and scribbling his name across the credit slip, when the waitress appeared back at the table.

"Ready?" Paul asked pushing the receipt and pen to the middle of the table and standing up.

Will nodded and stood up. They walked out heading back to the square.

Paul reached out and took Wills hand, he threaded their fingers together. It had been a while since he had enjoyed someone's company so much.

"Nice night." Will said, gazing up at the stars. "There must be a million stars up there."

"Yeah." Paul agreed, but truth be told he was too busy looking at Will, to give the stars more than a passing glance.

Will glanced at him, "You do realize, the stars are up there, right?" he said laughing and pointing toward the sky.

"Oh." Paul said feigning confusion. He looked up and turned a circle. "You're right, there must be a million, maybe a billion of them up there."

"Come on, It's so nice out here, let's walk back through the park before we go home." Will said tugging on his hand.

Paul followed him easily. They walked in companionable silence. He was enjoying the feel of Will's hand tucked in his, the way their shoulders bumped every once in a while. He liked the ease of the banter between them. Will's sense of humor had really come out lately.

They had made it almost all the way through the park, when they came to a small private-ish alcove. Will stopped and pulled Paul back to him. "I had a good time tonight." he said.

Paul looked at him quizzically, "So did I." he agreed.

"I wanted to say, thank you." Will continued.

Paul grinned, his sexy little grin. "I think you have said that already tonight, besides what are you thanking me for? You invited me remember, so I should be thanking you."

"But you paid." Will chuckled. "So technically the thanks go to you."

"In that case, you are welcome then." Paul said.

Will reached up and wrapped a hand behind Paul's neck. He pulled Paul to him, licking his lips just before they met Paul's.

Will kissed him softly, just a gentle pressure of his lips, before he pulled back just an inch or two. Paul sighed lightly before he mimicked Will's actions, his fingers curling around Will's neck pulling him closer, covering Will's lips with his own, he licked along the seam asking for and gaining entrance. He explored Will's mouth languidly.

After several long kisses, Paul pulled Will further into his arms, hugging him tightly.

Will wrapped his arms around Paul and rested his head on Paul's shoulder. He was working hard to resist the urge to drag Paul back to his apartment so that they could spend the entire night doing exactly what was on both of their minds.

They stood there for several long minutes, wrapped in each others other's arms before Will finally pulled away. "It's getting late." he said. "We should get going."

"Okay." Paul said easily.

Will wasn't quite ready to relinquish the physical contact just yet, so he tangled their fingers together again.

They turned to leave and were surprised when Sonny stepped out of the shadows. "Well I have to tell you that was a real treat to watch." he snarled at them.

"Sonny." Paul said. "I'm sorry you had to see that, we didn't see you there."

"Sorry! Really?" Sonny snapped, "Or was it the perfect way to get back at me for breaking up with you?"

"Okay that's not what this is about Sonny." Paul said, getting angry.

"Isn't it funny how memory loss is super convenient when it comes to forgetting all the bad things that Will has done. How about when he seduced you and slept with you all to get the big scoop of you coming out. Just so he could make a name for himself as a writer in Hollywood?" Sonny said snidely.

"Sonny… Sonny...stop." Paul said. "Come on."

"Do you know what he's after now? Do you, Do you know what he's after now?" Sonny sneered.

"Frankly it is none of your damn business." Paul snapped, getting angry.

"You know what, you're right." Sonny said, turning to walk off.

"No, wait, you don't get to walk away, not yet." Will said. "You've told so many lies my head is spinning… You probably can't even keep up. First you told me that Paul seduced me, took advantage of me to get back at you. Now your story is that I seduced him for a story…. So tell me, which is it? And how am I supposed to ever believe a word that you have to say?"

Sonny ignored Will and looked back at Paul, "Let's hope he doesn't cheat on you like he cheated on me." Sonny threw at him before he stormed off.

Will looked at Paul, and he looked anguished. Will knew that even with whatever was happening between them, Paul hadn't wanted to hurt Sonny in the process. He squeezed Paul's hand gently. "I'm sorry." he said.

"What for?" Paul asked.

"You know, for Sonny, both that he witnessed that and also for what he said about me hurting you like I hurt him." Will said.

"Well he said it, you didn't, so it isn't your fault."Paul said, "Besides he is going to have to get used to seeing us together."

"Uhh, It is my fault, because clearly I cheated, whether I remember it or not, but I don't think I am that guy anymore."

"Hey!" Paul said. "Let's not worry about that right now. Sonny is just angry and he is lashing out."

"Will nodded, "I guess so." he said. He knew that Sonny was mad and upset, but he also knew that Sonny had a habit of manipulating things to fit his needs.

"Come on." Paul said. "Let me get you home."

They walked back to the apartment building and Paul walked Will to his door. "Good night Will." he said, kissing him on the cheek.

"Do you want to come in?" Will asked.

"No." Paul said, "I don't think I should, Not tonight."

"Okay." Will said. "Good night."

Paul pressed a quick kiss to his lips and backed up waiting for Will to go into his apartment.

Paul went to his own apartment and let himself in. That hadn't been the way he had envisioned the night ending. Sonny was really hurt and he wished that there was something he could do about that, but there wasn't, not aside from giving up what he had with Will. He wasn't even sure yet what they had, but he did know that it was worth fighting for. Besides Will had made it more than plain to him that he wasn't interested in Sonny, so it wasn't like he would go running to Sonny even if he wasn't in the picture.

He peeled his clothes off and dropped them into the dirty clothes before slipping beneath the covers again. He lay awake thinking for a long time before he finally fell into a fitful sleep.


	10. Chapter 10

Will lay in bed, thinking about what Paul had said about the spectator. He had promised him that he would give it a shot, and he was going to, but he had been dancing around that promise for a week now. He was nervous. There were so many things that could go wrong. What if she turned him down without giving him a chance to state his case. Or Maybe worse, what if she gave him the job and he couldn't do it, maybe he lost his talent while he had been busy bartending for the past two years. What if he embarrassed himself by completely screwing up his first assignment, Paul would be so disappointed in him.

He groaned inwardly, he knew he was looking for excuses and being a coward.

He picked up the phone and looked at the time. It was only a few minutes after 8am, he went to his contacts and selected Adrienne's cell number. He almost pressed send, but changed his mind, instead he got out of the bed, and went to shower. He would just go see her in person.

Will stood in the shower letting the hot water melt away his tension. He stayed there until the water was barely warm, then he stepped out of the shower, and dried off quickly. Fastening the towel around his waist he brushed his teeth and combed his hair. Then he went to stand in front of the closet…. What did one wear to go and ask their estranged husband's mother for a job? In the end he selected black jeans and a red plaid shirt. He dressed quickly and slid on his shoes. He grabbed his sport coat and was just about to walk out the door, when his phone beeped. It was a text message. Will pulled his phone from his pocket. He hoped it was Paul, he hadn't seen him in a couple days, he guessed he had been busy working on whatever case he was working for Black Patch these days. At least he hoped that's all it was. He was nervous that Paul was having second thoughts after they had that nasty run in with Sonny.

He opened his text messages.

"I need to see you." It was from Sonny.

Will stared at the phone, he knew that Sonny was probably still pissed, and probably wanted to argue some more. He waited, trying to decide if he wanted to get into it right now, or put it off. He had done quite a bit of soul searching this week. He had plenty of time to think about things now that he had moved into his apartment, and since Sonny had been angry at him, he hadn't been dropping by, or calling, texting, always pushing him to remember, it had been very quiet. He hadn't been feeling the pressure that had become the one constant in his life, and it was nice.

"Preferably in private." a second text.

He sighed, he may as well get this over with. "Fine, I am at my apartment." he texted back.

"On my way." the reply was almost immediate.

Will put the phone down. He had came to the conclusion that he was going to file for divorce. Things were getting out of hand and it wasn't fair to let Sonny hope that things were going to change, when he knew they weren't. Maybe once they filed the papers Sonny would start letting go and move on with his life.

It was about thirty minutes later when there was a knock on the door.

Will took a deep breath and went over and opened the door.

"Hey." Will said. "Come on in." he said stepping aside.

Sonny walked into the room. "Hey." he said quietly. "Thanks for letting me come by."

Will just nodded.

Sonny looked around the apartment. There were pictures of Will and Arianna, and a couple of pictures of Arianna alone. He recognized a couple of them as pictures that he had brought to Will, hoping they would help him regain his memory. Clearly he had been chasing a dream since Will came back. Will certainly wasn't putting a lot of effort into remembering, It didn't look like he even cared if he remembered him or not.

"You want some water or a soda or something?" Will asked.

"No thanks." Sonny said. "I am fine."

Will nodded again, but remained silent. He wanted to give Sonny the opportunity to tell him what was on his mind.

Sonny paced the small room, but still didn't say anything.

Will waited another couple of minutes in awkward silence, until he couldn't take it anymore, "So… you wanted to see me." he prompted.

Sonny turned and faced him and pulled in a deep breath. "Did you and Paul have a nice time the other night?" he asked, searching Will's face.

He knew Sonny was still angry, but that wasn't really the direction he saw the conversation going. "That isn't something that we need to talk about." Will said.

"Sure it is." Sonny said. "I think I have the right to know, don't you, since I am your husband."

"Actually no, I don't." Will said. "But I am glad that you brought that up." He said, thinking it would be better to get it over with. "I wanted to tell you that I have made a decision. I am filing for divorce."

Sonny visibly blanched, the color drained from his face. "What?" he said, "No, Will don't, please don't do this, Please don't do this. PLEASE WILL…. Please don't throw this away."

"I'm not throwing anything away, this is the only thing I can do, that makes sense, Whatever we HAD," he said stressing the word. "I can't feel that anymore and I know you are trying so hard, but it just isn't there, and staying together right now wouldn't be fair to you.. or me." Will said.

"Then forget about me, What about our little girl, our little Ari?" Sonny said anguished.

"Ari is going to have both of us, she is, she is gonna have both of us. She is just not going to have us together." Will said. "I'm sorry Sonny, I hurt you once and I won't do that again, I am trying to be honest with you."

"Okay then let's be honest…. How would you know what's there or not? Do you realize that you have barely let me touch you since you have been back, everytime I hug you or touch you in anyway I feel you tense up. You basically cringe when I try to kiss you." Sonny said. "Do you know how gut wrenching it was for me, seeing you with Paul, the way he kissed you, and the way you responded to him. It ripped my heart out to see you cling to him like you couldn't bear to let him go?" he was almost in tears.

"I'm sorry you had to see that." Will said. "It wasn't wasn't our intention to hurt you."

"I should have known actually that I wasn't going to like where things were headed the other night." Sonny confessed. "I should have gotten out of there while I could, but for some reason I just couldn't couldn't make myself move, even though I knew what was fixing to happen, I had to see it for myself."

Will gaped at him, trying to understand what Sonny was saying. "Wait, were you following us?" he asked suspiciously. Anger began to take hold of him.

"What? No!" Sonny said. "God Will, I am not some lunatic stalker, I am your husband."

"Then what were you doing there?" Will asked, not willing to just believe him blindly.

"Not that it's any of your business, but I couldn't sleep, so I was out for a walk." Sonny said. "And I saw the two of you when you pulled him into the shadows. So I waited to see what you were doing."

"There is plenty of room to walk on the grounds of the Kiriakis mansion, what were you doing across town in the park?" Will asked, still skeptical.

Sonny ignored the question, "Why don't you let me touch you like that?" he asked instead. "Would it really be so terrible? I am your husband, we are in love."

"Were…" Will said. "We were in love. Even though we obviously had our problems I am sure that I loved you very much, but everything about us feels strange to me now, I don't know another way to tell you that I don't feel anything when I look at you. I am sorry if that hurts you Sonny, but I can't just force myself to feel something."

"Will…." Sonny whispered sadly, walking toward him, he stopped when they were toe to toe. "Please just give me a chance, let me show you how good it can be between us." he whispered. He framed Will's face with his hands and searched his eyes. Sonny licked his lips and Will knew what was coming next. Sonny was going to kiss him. His first instinct was to throw his hands up and back away, but he willed himself to remain still, he could make one little concession for Sonny.

Sonny's lips covered his, and Will stood still, forcing himself to give Sonny the chance he was begging for. He did his best to open his mind to the feelings that Sonny used to bring to him. He parted his lips allowing him entrance, and Sonny immediately deepened the kiss. Will closed his eyes, giving himself over to the sensations. There was no denying that it was a nice kiss, Sonny definitely had some skill, but there were no fireworks. The way that he used to feel whenever he was in the same room with Sonny, that spark of excitement whenever Sonny was near him, the desire that licked through his veins like wildfire whenever Sonny touched him was disturbingly absent. Sonny sighed into his mouth and pulled him closer, his arms going around Will holding him as close as possible. Will's arms hung awkwardly at his sides, and yet he remained still.

The whole kiss only lasted a couple of minutes. Sonny realized that Will wasn't responding and broke the kiss. He looked into his eyes again, looking for a memory or a spark. "Don't you feel it Will?" he asked frustrated. "Can't you feel the attraction between us?" he pleaded, his eyes bore into Will's, begging him to agree. "You have to feel something, right, anything at all."

Will shook his head. "I'm sorry Sonny." he said. "I know this is hard for you."

"Will, give it a chance. Please. I know you don't remember, and that I have been a little intense about you getting your memories back… but I don't mean to be, I'm sorry…. Please just try to give us a chance, you may find out that it doesn't matter if you remember or not..." He said before pulling Will to him, crushing his lips under his again. He forced Will's lips open and explored his mouth. His fingers came up and worked at the buttons on Will's shirt, releasing them one by one, until he could part the material. He flattened his hands on Will's chest marvelling at the way he felt. Clearly all those months of living those crates of alcohol had been good to him. He leaned back and gazed into Will's eyes. Will covered Sonny's hands on his chest and pulled them away.

"I'm sorry, I can't do this with you. It would be just sex for me, and I don't think that is what you are looking for." Will said.

Sonny dropped his arms, and stepped back, completely breaking the contact between them. "That's it then? You want out?"

Will shoved his hand through his hair. "I'm just telling you that I can't do this anymore, One of us has to do the right thing for both of us, I am filing for divorce." he said again.

Sonny's eyes hardened. "Fine, go ahead I know you are doing this so you can be with Paul." he said. "Don't let me stand in your way." he said before slamming out of the apartment.

Will sat on the bed once he was gone, he closed his eyes and rubbed his temples. He had been thinking that he needed to come clean with everyone about his memory, but if things were this complicated when he had amnesia, how much worse would it get when people found out he had his memory back. It was a scary thought for him, and something he wasn't prepared to deal with.

He thought briefly about going to see Adrienne but discarded the idea pretty quickly. She probably would not be very receptive to the idea now, especially not if Sonny was telling her about the divorce. She had never really thought he was good enough for her son, but this wasn't going to win him any brownie points.

He picked up his phone, found Marlena's name and sent her a text asking where she was. He needed to talk to someone, and besides Paul she was the only one he wanted to talk to 99% of the time.

When she responded back that she was at home, he texted her back that he was coming over to talk, and then left his apartment.

Once he was there he didn't even bother to knock, after all he had lived there up until a couple of weeks ago, so he didn't see the point, he just opened the door and strode into the apartment. He found Marlena in the living room, doing some paperwork.

Hey Grandma." he said.

Marlena looked up in surprise, "WOW…." She teased, "That was… Will what's wrong?" she asked, seeing right away that he was in an agitated state. She stood up, clearly worried, her hand went to her throat.

"I just told Sonny, I am filing for divorce." he said without preamble.

"Oh." she said. "Honey, are you sure?"

"Ummhmm." Will said. "It isn't fair to keep him hanging on hoping I will change my mind, I won't." he said drawing his bottom lip between his teeth and gnawing on it. "I don't want to be with him anymore."

"Can I ask, why today? What happened that made you decide you want to file now?" she asked.

Will shrugged and continued to chew on his lip.

"Uh huh, nope." she said, calling him on his bull. "That is not going to work, not with me, I know you, young man."

"I want to be with Paul." Will said. "And being with him would be cheating on Sonny all over again. I don't want to be that person."

"I see." she said, taking her glasses off and dropping them onto the papers in front of her on the coffee table. "I know you said you are attracted to Paul, we talked about that. Did something happen with Paul?" Will shook his head.

"Okay then" she said."How did Sonny take it?" she asked.

"Not good." Will admitted, "He knows that I want to be with Paul, he's pretty hurt."

"Sonny loves you very much." Marlena said. "Of course he is hurting."

"I'm not trying to hurt him grandma." He said. "I hate that this is hurting him, but what am I supposed to do? Paul is all that I can think about, he is the first thing on my mind when I wake up and the last thing I think about before I go to sleep. I don't think that would be happening if I was in love with Sonny, do you?" he asked.

"What I think, is that no one can tell you what you feel." she said. "And I also think that it isn't any of anyone's business, what happens between you and Sonny, or you and Paul for that matter."

"So you don't think this makes me a bad person?" he asked.

"Will... my precious boy, I am never going to think you are a bad person." she said. "It is impossible, and I will support you always, no matter what."

"Thanks Grandma." he said.

"Now tell me about Paul." she said. "I know how you feel, but how does he feel?"

"I'm not sure." Will said… "We went out the other night and and it was great. He is soo easy to talk to."

"Well that's a start." she said.

"Yep, things were great until we ran into Sonny." Will continued. "He was so angry, and bitter, and that's when I started thinking about all of this."

"And what does Paul think about all of this? She asked. "The divorce?"

"I haven't told him yet." Will answered. "You are the first person I have told besides Sonny."

"So how do you feel now that you have told Sonny?" she asked.

Will looked at her funny, "Are you shrinking me grandma?" he asked, a teasing grin playing on his lips.

She chuckled, "I prefer to call it, trying to help you work through your feelings." she said.

"Honestly, I feel relieved." he said. "Like I can finally breathe, but…"

She waited for him to go on. But he remained silent. "But…" she prompted.

"Also a little guilty." Will said.

"Guilty?" she asked. "Why do you feel guilty?"

"I don't know, I guess because I couldn't have the feelings for him that he wanted me to. Also because I seem to have those and more for Paul. " he answered.

"Well, we can't always control human nature." she said. "Sometimes things are out of our control. You simply can not make yourself feel something that you don't, you can pretend it's there, but then resentment and anger find their way in, and in the end, all parties involved will be miserable."

"I don't want that." Will said.

"I know you don't." Marlena said. "Just trust that you did the right thing."

"Thanks Grandma." he said hugging her.

"Come on." Marlena said. "I was just about to make myself some tea, you can join me." she said leading him into the kitchen.


	11. Chapter 11

"So what do you want to do?" Paul said, "We can hit the clubs or just go for drinks again, or we can have dinner, catch a movie. There's supposed to be a really good scary movie playing right now. I read somewhere that people are even scared to eat popcorn in the theater,...or we could always stay in and play video games, whatever you want."

Will listened as he kept throwing out suggestions. Will shrugged, "Doesn't matter to me." he said. Truthfully he didnt care if they just sat and looked at each other as long as they were together, the night would be perfect.

"Come on Will there must be something that appeals to you." Paul said.

Will have him a saucy grin. "Oh trust me there is." he said.

Paul rolled his eyes… "Concentrate Horton." he teased.

"Seriously, you pick." Will said. "It really doesn't matter to me, I don't have a preference."

"Okay, then let's go catch the basketball game at the college and we can get something to eat after." Paul said.

"Mmmkay." Will agreed readily.

"Great, it's just starting so, we should get going." Paul said looking at his watch.

Will nodded and grabbed his keys. He waited for Paul to walk out, then he followed and pulled the door closed behind them.

They slipped into the gym, just about in the middle of the first half and found their way to their seats. Paul asked if he wanted a drink or anything, when Will declined they settled in to watch the game.

Paul watched the game intently, clearly invested, cheering and whistling with the crowd, while Will spent most of his time watching Paul.

Midway through the second half Paul glanced over and caught Will staring at him. "What do you think?" Paul asked. "Have we got a shot?"

"Huh?" Will asked.

Paul motioned to the court, "Think we have a shot at winning?" he asked again.

"Oh!" Will said, when it dawned on him what Paul was asking. He glanced at the scoreboard. "Yeah, I mean I guess." he shrugged his shoulders.

"They are playing pretty decent." Paul said.

"Yeah." Will agreed evasively.

Paul giggled. "Will, have we been watching the same game?" he asked, "We suck, we have barely scored at all in the last 5 minutes and we are losing by 20 points."

"Sorry." Will said sheepishly. "I guess I wasn't watching that close."

"Don't you like basketball?" Paul asked. "We can go, if you would rather do something else." he said.

"No, I do like it..." Will said. "I guess I was just distracted by my ridiculously hot date." he teased.

"Is that so?" Paul asked before he leaned over and kissed Will simply on the lips.

Will returned the gentle pressure. Allowing his eyes to slide closed. His heart was content.

Paul broke away and turned back to the game just as the entire gym broke out in a roar of applause and screams.

Will gave the scoreboard a cursory glance and saw that by some miracle, there was only a 10 point difference in the score now. They must have really turned it on for the second half.

Paul was again engrossed in the game and Will was captivated by him. It was so nice to just be able to be with someone, spend time with someone that accepted him for who he is… Paul never pushed him, never tried to get him to remember anything, he never even mentioned the past.

The game continued, Will did his best to concentrate on what was happening on the court but for reasons he didn't understand he was just wasn't all that into it. Paul made for a much better subject.

When the game was over Paul stood up and offered Will his hand. "You hungry?" he asked.

"Starved." Will said wagging his eyebrows suggestively.

"Why do I feel like we aren't talking about food?" Paul asked chuckling.

"I have no idea." Will said, battering his eyelashes, giving Paul his best innocent look.

"Sure you don't." Paul teased. "I guess you are completely innocent."

"Of course I am." Will said indignantly.

"Yeah, Yeah." Paul said. "I believe you."

Seriously, I am." Will said. "Now where do you want to eat, it's my treat this time so your choice…"

"Will, you are not paying for this date, I am." Paul said. "If I couldn't afford it, I wouldn't have asked you out." he winked. "Now come on, I want to go try that new Japanese Hibachi Grill outside of town."

"Ooh yum." Will said. "What are we waiting for?"

When they got to the restaurant Paul asked for a quiet table, and they were seated in a cozy corner that offered them a little privacy.

When the waitress came up and asked for their drink order, they both ordered beer. Will picked up the menu to consider his choices. He noticed that Paul just put his menu to the side without even cracking it open.

"Already know what you want?" he asked mystified. He thought Paul had said he wanted to try this restaurant.

Paul nodded. "Yes, but take your time, there is no rush, we have all the time in the world." he said indicating the open menu in Will's hands.

Paul pulled out his phone and scrolled through his emails, quickly checking to make sure there was nothing that couldn't wait while Will poured over the menu.

A short while later the waitress came back with the beer and took their food orders. "It will be right out." she said. Then she gathered the menus and hurried off.

"So." Paul said. "Have you talked to Adrienne about the job yet?" he asked.

Will rubbed the back of his neck, "Umm no." he said embarrassed.

"Why not?" Paul asked.

"It's complicated." Will said.

"What's complicated about it?" Paul asked. "You are a journalist, she needs a journalist."

"You make it sound so easy." Will said sighing.

"It is, isn't it?" Paul asked confused.

"Not really." Will said. "What if I am not a journalist anymore, who knows if I am even any good at it anymore?"

"All of that stuff Will, the skill, the talent for writing, the excitement that you felt chasing the stories… all of that is in here." Paul said placing his hand over his own heart. That stuff doesn't just go away. You are an amazing writer. I know it, hell everyone in this town knows it, you just need to believe it."

"Okay, okay." Will said relenting, "I will go. I promise." he said.

"You are going for it Will… and you are going to get it, I know it!" Paul said, a huge grin spreading across his face.

"I am going to go for it." Will agreed. This was a whole new world to him, the way Paul supported him and encouraged him to go after what he wanted, the way he reassured him that he was not just good enough but the best possible choice. Those were all things that he had never had before.

The waitress came with their food. She sat the dishes down in front of them and put extra napkins on the table. "Would you like another?" she said pointing to the beer bottles on the table.

"Sure." Paul said. "Will?"he asked.

"Oh, yeah!" Will agreed.

She nodded and went back toward the bar.

Once she had brought the beer back and took the empty bottles Will and Paul were left to eat in peace.

Will picked at his food, he was distracted watching Paul eat. He couldn't seem to tear his eyes away. Will found he liked to watch him bring his food to his mouth using the chopsticks the waitress had laid down beside their plates… Will had opted for the fork, using Chopsticks and having no coordination probably would have made for a messy meal for him.

Paul glanced up and once again Will was caught staring. "What?" Paul said chuckling, do I have food on my face or something?"

Will blushed, and shook his head, no.

"Well is my hair sticking up?" Paul asked smoothing his hair down. "You keep staring at me?"

Will's blush deepened, turning his face a deep crimson. He quickly searched his brain for a whitty comment and came up blank. "Sorry." he whispered instead.

"Don't be sorry!" Paul said. "I am flattered really, but aren't you hungry?" he said pointing his chopsticks at Will's plate.

"Oh yeah." he said, twirling his fork in the noodles distractedly. He took a small bite and hummed. It was really good.

Paul watched him as he began to eat, "Do you like it?"

He asked.

Will nodded enthusiastically. "It's delicious." he said.

"Good." Paul said, taking another bite from his own plate.

"Yours good?" Will asked.

"Yeah, really good actually." Paul said. "Want to try a bite?"

Will looked at his plate skeptically, Whatever Paul was eating it looked pretty spicy. "Sure." he said after a couple minutes of contemplation.

He reached over to steal a piece with his fork, but Paul pushed his hand away. Instead he picked up the food with his chopsticks and offered it to Will.

Will's eyes twinkled as he leaned across the table, and took the food Paul offered him. Whatever silly thoughts he had about being coy or seductive disappeared the minute the flavor burst on his tongue. He immediately felt like he was on fire. He chewed the food quickly and swallowed it, chasing it with the rest of his beer.

"Wow." he said. His mouth still felt like a raging inferno. "That's pretty hot." he said, embarrassed. Paul didn't look like he was bothered by the heat.

"Too hot for you?" Paul asked.

"Nah, it's good." Will said.

Paul held up another bite, offering it to Will. Will shook his head, "You go ahead." he said. He wasn't going to embarrass himself any further. He was already feeling the need to blink back tears.

Paul smiled. "I'm sorry, I should have warned you." He said, "it takes a while to get used to the spices and the peppers."

"It's fine, it is really good." Will said, signaling to the waitress to bring another beer.

She brought it over and then offered Paul another. "Just a glass of water." he said, dismissing her.

When she came back with the water, Paul pushed it across the table to Will.

Will drank the water and when his mouth finally cooled down, he took a few more bites of his own food before pushing it away.

"Thanks." he said. "That's was awesome."

"I'm glad you liked it." Paul said, "Next time we come back I won't offer you anything that spicy."."

The waitress walked by leaving the check on the edge of the table.

Will reached over and picked it up, but Paul quickly took it from his hands. "I'm paying, remember." he said.

He laid it back in the tray with his credit card. While they waited for the waitress to pick up the check, Paul reached out and grasped Will's hand threading their fingers together. "What should we do now?" he asked. He looked at his watch, it was still pretty early.

"We could still go to the movie." Will said.

"Yeah." Paul said, "or we could save that for our next date, that gives me a reason to ask you out again."

"Oh!" Will said. "Well then I guess we can just go home then."

When the waitress brought Paul's card and the check back, he signed the receipt and picked up the card. He stood offering Will his hand, and Will stood and slid his hand into Paul's and allowed Paul to lead him out of the restaurant.

They were quiet on the way back to the apartment building, each lost to their own thoughts. Will had such a nice time, he wasn't ready for the night to end.

"So do you want to come in?" Will asked as they rode up in the elevator.

Paul looked at him hesitantly making Will nervous.

The elevator opened and they walked hand in hand down the hall. It was quiet for a Friday night, most people were probably still out since it was still early.

When they stopped in front of Will's door, Paul turned to him. "Tonight was great!" he said. "I really had a good time."

Will nodded, "Me too." he agreed. "Thank you."

"Thank you… for coming out with me tonight!" Paul said.

Will turned loose of Paul's hand and slid his hands around Paul's waist bringing their bodies together.

Paul went to him willingly, closing his arms around Will hugging him close.

"Come inside with me." Will whispered.

"I don't know if that is a good idea." Paul said.

"Why?" Will asked. "It's been a good night, it doesn't have to end yet."

Paul's eyes slid closed. Will just didn't realize how tempting he was… if he went into the apartment he didn't know if he would have the willpower to end things at a goodnight kiss.

He released Will, and he pulled the key from his pocket and turned, opening the door quickly.

They stepped into the apartment and Will swung the door closed behind them.


	12. Chapter 12

Will closed the door behind them and reached out grabbing Paul by the hand. He pulled Paul to him and wrapped his arms around him tightly.

"Now where were we?" he asked, kissing Paul lightly on the lips.

Paul put his arms around Will, he fit their bodies together and held him close. "This feels about right." he said.

"Uh huh." Will said snuggling closer. "I think here." he said when he was as close as possible."

"That's nice too." Paul said.

"Ummhmm" Will agreed, leaning up and touching his lips to Paul's.

Paul groaned at the simple pressure. He opened his mouth over Will's and flicked his tongue against the seam of his lips asking for entrance.

Will opened his mouth, allowing Paul to explore. His tongue tangled and danced with Paul's. Paul's hands went to his hips, his fingers digging in, holding him as close as possible.

Will wrapped his arms around Paul's neck, his fingers creeping into the dark hair at the nape of his neck, tugging him impossibly closer. Paul sighed into his mouth and deepened the kiss. His tongue stroking Will's rhythmically.

Wills hips moved against Paul's of their own accord, seeking friction, searching for relief. Paul was happy to oblige, he walked forward, backing Will up until his back was flat against the door. He reached up and pulled Will's hands from around his neck and pinned them against the door above his head.

His mouth ravaged Will's, exploring every nook and cranny, his hips rocked against Will's insistently.

Will kissed him back fervently, and wriggled his wrists until Paul let go. His hands immediately went to Paul's waist, tunneling under his shirt. He wanted to feel Paul's bare skin beneath his palms.

Paul moaned at the feel of Will's fingers creeping up his chest. That was all the encouragement Will needed. He pulled and tugged the shirt until Paul got the idea and helped him to get it over his head.

Will pushed Paul back, feasting his eyes on the other man's chest. He tucked his bottom lip between his teeth. Paul was even more gorgeous than he remembered.

Paul allowed him a minute to gaze, before he smiled brightly, "Now yours." he said. He grabbed the front of Will's shirt and used it to pull him forward. Paul slid the buttons free one by one, until Will got tired of waiting. "Ugh." he said as he reached over his shoulder and tugged the shirt over his head, then dropped it on the floor.

"Come here." Will said… pulling Paul forward. He stood on his tip toes, and pressed a kiss to Paul's lips, his jaw, then he trailed his lips down his neck and licked over his collar bone tasting the saltiness of his skin. Paul moaned loudly and let his head fall back giving Will room to explore.

Will's hands slid down his chest, his thumbs grazing Paul's nipples. He felt them harden under his palms as he continued his exploration.

Paul stayed still as long as he could before, he backed up, slipping his fingers into the waistband of Will's jeans pulling him forward. Paul walked backwards until the backs of his knees were against the edge of the bed. He scrambled onto the bed, pulling Will down with him. He wrapped his hand around the back of Will's neck. Paul kissed him soundly on his lips, before he rolled them over and pushed him back against the bed.

Finally, Will was on his back beneath him, Paul threw a leg over him, straddling Will. He trailed his fingers over Will's skin, tracing his collar bone, down the center of his chest. Will shivered as Paul followed the trail with his mouth, pressing kisses to every inch of Wills chest.

Will wriggled beneath him, oohing and aching at the sensations. He had pushed all of his memories of being with Paul away once he had ended their relationship but, they were back front and center, all the ways that Paul made him feel, all the things he could do to his body that made him want to beg for release.

Will reached up, trailing his hands up and down Paul's arms, gripping his shoulders, down his sides to his thighs. Paul pulled Will's hand to his mouth, kissed his open palm, his wrist, nibbling on his forearm.

Will sat up, capturing Paul's lips with his own. Will kissed him deeply. Paul's hands rested on his back, stroking him gently.

When they broke apart, Will leaned his forehead against Paul's. Their breath mingled together. He closed his eyes, trying to reel in his spiraling emotions.

Paul put his fingers under Will's chin and brought their lips together again, he kissed him softly, laying Will back again, and stretching out over him.

Will curled one of his legs over Paul's, rubbing against him. His fingers went to the button on Paul's jeans. He pulled it open and tugged the zipper down. "God, I've missed this." he whispered, shoving at the offending clothes, trying to get them out of his way.

Paul froze, sitting up, abruptly breaking all contact with Will. He sat back on his heels on the bed beside Will. "What did you just say?" he asked looking at the other man curiously.

Will closed his eyes, "damn it", he swore under his breath. "I don't remember, it was probably nothing important." he said reaching for Paul trying to pull him back into a kiss.

"Will, You said, 'I've missed this.'.." Paul said, pausing to give Will time to respond. Watching the emotions play across his face.

"I've missed kissing and touching you like this." Will admitted. "We haven't really had any physical contact since that night in the park… remember?" he asked.

"The night we ran into Sonny." Paul asked.

Will nodded mutely.

The mention of Sonny was like a dash of cold water in his face. "God… Will…. We can't do this." Paul said, thinking clearly for the first time since he stepped into Will's apartment. He scooted off of the bed and went over retrieving his shirt from the floor. He started to put it on.

Will scrambled off the bed. "What? Wait, why?" he asked. He reached out and put his hand on Paul's arm, stopping his motion. "I don't understand." he said.

"Sonny." Paul said, just the one word like it explained everything.

"What about him?" Will asked. "I thought we were past that, you were just as into it as I was."

"Will…." Paul said, He turned around pulling the shirt over his head. He straightened it before he turned back around. "It's not what you think." he said.

"Then tell me, explain it to me." Will said, "Because right now my brain is telling me that you are still hung up on him and I don't want to believe that." he bent over and picked up his own shirt, unbuttoning the last few buttons before he slipped it over his shoulders. He left it hanging open but crossed his arms over his chest.

Will looked hurt, and Paul wanted nothing more than to go to him and reassure him, that he wanted him, not Sonny... but if he touched Will again right now, he wouldn't be able to stop. "No!" Paul said. "Obviously I am not thinking about Sonny…. at all," he motioned to the bed, "Not with what almost happened between us but you are still married to him."

"That's what all of this is about?" Will asked. "I'm sorry, I should have told you already."

"Told me what?" Paul asked.

"I told Sonny that I am filing for divorce." Will said.

"You did?" Paul asked. "When?"

"The other day." Will said.

"What made you decide to do that?" Paul asked.

Because it wasn't fair to let Sonny think that I was going to wake up one day and come back to him." Will said, "That isn't going to happen. He came to the apartment to talk. He was still really upset about seeing us in the park and I just felt like I needed to tell him."

"That is a huge decision." Paul said. "Are you sure, this is what you want?" he asked.

"Definitely. " Will said.

"How did Sonny take it?" Paul asked

"About like I expected him to, he accused me of not giving him a real chance. He said I never let him get close to me. He even tried to convince me to stay with him for Ari's sake."

"Wow." Paul said. "And you are 100% sure this is what you want?"

"I have already filed the papers," Will said. "Mainly because I didn't want to cheat on Sonny again, I hurt him like that once and I don't want to do it again, but I want to be with you." He reached out toward Paul.

Paul took his hand, lacing their fingers together, before he reached for the other hand and repeated the action. "And you will, we will be together." Paul said.

Will smiled and moved forward, connecting their bodies once more, He put his hand on the back of Paul's neck pulling him down for a kiss.

Paul turned his head at the last minute and Will's lips landed on his cheek. "Not tonight though." he said, when Will pouted at him. He laughed, pulling Will into his arms, hugging him tight.

"It's over between me and Sonny." Will said. "Why do we have to wait?"

"You just said that you don't want to cheat again, and I don't want to ask you to." Paul said. "There will be plenty of opportunities. Besides this was only our second official date."

"Fine." Will said begrudgingly.

"I should go." Paul said, "I only have so much willpower." he teased.

"See you tomorrow?" Will asked.

"Sure." Paul agreed readily.

Will raised up on his tiptoes again. "Night." he whispered before capturing Paul's mouth one more time.

Paul parted his lips giving Will the access that he knew he wanted. Will's tongue tangled with his, then glided over his teeth, teasing the roof of his mouth. Before he finally released him and stood back.

"Night." Paul repeated back to him feeling behind him for the door knob, when he found it he wrenched the door open and hurried out.

Will chuckled and shut the door, at least he knew Paul wasn't completely immune to his charms.

Once in his own apartment, Paul stripped and went straight to the shower. He turned the water to cool and stepped in. God he wanted Will… and it would have been so easy to say to hell with right and wrong and just take what had been so freely offered. But he didn't want Will to regret anything. Especially with him not able to remember his past…

"God, I've missed this." that's what Will had said tonight. For a split second Paul had thought Will had his memory back, and it had scared the hell out of him. The fire in his blood had quickly turned to ice.

Paul got out of the shower and dried quickly before going into the bedroom and slipping into bed. He tossed and turned. He had pent up nervous energy and couldn't seem to get settled in one position.

How much more of this emotional roller coaster could he take, he had been with Will, and was beginning to feel things he had thought he never would feel again. Then Will had revealed that he was not only married ,but married to Sonny and he had broken things off with him, then Will died and he got his beloved Sonny back, then all the sudden Will was alive and Sonny dropped him again, and then in a particularly twisted turn of events, amnesiac Will didn't want Sonny, amnesiac Will wants him. He was just starting to let his guard down, and allow himself to feel something again. If Will remembered his past, the cycle would start all over again. Paul wasn't sure he could take it, but the alternative was hoping that Will never got his memory back and that didn't feel right either.

He closed his eyes, trying to calm his troubled thoughts. It was hard to be calm, tonight wasn't the first time he had felt that nudge of fear, that sixth sense, clawing at him, telling him that something wasn't quite right... What was that Will has said before, the night he had found him so upset in his apartment, he had said he understood why Sonny wanted to punish him. Like he remembered exactly why Sonny would have left him, exactly what he had done to deserve being punished. He had felt the cold fingers of fear gripping him that night as well. His first thought then had been that Will had his memory back, but that was insane, surely Will would say something.. right? What reason would he have to hide it?

Paul dismissed his thoughts as crazy. He could not keep thinking stuff like that or he was going to make himself nuts. He turned over and pulled the covers up around him, even though it was chilly outside he had still turned the air conditioner on, it was an old habit of his. He closed his eyes and concentrated on the steady hum, and finally he drifted into a fitful sleep.

Will turned from the door and looked at the bed. The spread was wrinkled and the pillows were in a disarray. He groaned, "Damnit" he said to the empty room. "Why did I have to bring up Sonny?" he could literally kick his own ass for that mistake.

He flipped down across the bed sighing, if he hadn't brought Sonny's name up, Paul would still be here with him right now. Paul would be buried inside him making him scream out his name… yes, he remembered in great detail they ways that Paul could bring him to his knees, or maybe he would be buried in Paul, they had never had any trouble in that area.

But once he had let it slip that he had been missing Paul, there wasn't another way to get out of the sticky situation he had created. He hadn't had a choice, the only alternative would have been to tell Paul that he remembered everything.

He thought about the possible outcomes of that. On one hand Paul could be happy for him, and relieved that finally he had his memory… or he could be pissed because Will had been lying to him, and if he was pissed, would he go back to Sonny. That was a chance that he wasn't sure he was willing to take.

So the alternative was to keep it a secret. It wasn't anybody's business anyway. It was his prerogative if he didn't want everyone to know that he remembered. Hopefully no one would ever know the difference.


	13. Chapter 13

"Wow, you were really hungry this morning." Will said, putting his own fork down. "Were your pancakes good?" he asked.

"They're my favorite!" Arianna said.

"I thought chicken nuggets were your favorite?" he teased.

"Daddy…." she giggled, "You can't eat chicken nuggets for breakfast."

"What?" Will pretended to be outraged. "Who says you can't eat chicken nuggets for breakfast?"

She giggled again. "You are supposed to eat scrambled eggs, and Bacon, and pancakes, and waffles, and biscuits…" she said.

"Ohhh, all that?" Will asked, "Where do you put it all?"

She giggled even harder. "No, daddy." she said again. "you are supposed to choose what you want to eat."

"Ahhh okay, I think I understand now." Will said, smiling. "So pancakes are your favorite breakfast huh?"

She nodded enthusiastically.

"I like pancakes too." Will said. "So, What do you want to do today?" he asked.

"Can we go to the park?" she asked.

"Sure we can." Will said. "Or we can go to the zoo, or we can go see a movie, whatever you want."

"Yay! The zoo!" the said bouncing in her seat, "Zoo zoo zoo!" she repeated.

"I guess it is the zoo then." Will said laughing.

He got up and held out her sweater for her to slip her arms in. "Okay Baby Girl." he said. "Let's go to the zoo."

They turned toward the door to leave, just as it opened and Paul stepped in.

Will's eyes met Paul's, "Hey!" he said shyly.

"Will, Hi!" he said looking down at Arianna. He crouched down to her level. "Hey Ari, how are you today?" he asked.

"Good." she said. "Daddy is taking me to the zoo."

"Wow, your dad is really nice to do that, a trip to the zoo sounds like a lot of fun!" Paul said. "I used to love the zoo when I was little like you."

"It is my favorite." she said smiling.

"Everything is your favorite today." Will said laughing.

"Well, you have fun at the zoo with daddy." Paul said, "Watch out for the silly monkeys." he whispered before tweaking her nose and making her giggle.

He was about to stand up when she reached out and touched his arm. "You wanna come too?" she asked.

"I don't know…" Paul said, "Today is your special day with your daddy." he said, glancing up at Will.

Will gazed down at him, holding his breath. Hoping he said yes.

"Daddy doesn't care if you come too…" she said, looking up at Will for confirmation.

"Oh," he said, realizing that he had to say something. "Yes of course, come with us." he said. "It will be fun."

"If you are sure…" Paul said hesitantly. "I don't want to intrude."

"We are totally sure." Will said. "Right Ari?"

Arianna flashed him a huge smile, and nodded excitedly.

"Okay then, I guess we are going to the zoo." Paul said.

"Do you want to eat first, we can wait for you?" Will asked. "You were coming here to eat right?"

Paul shrugged. "I can grab something to go and we can be on our way." he said.

Will nodded, "Then we will wait outside." he said.

They walked outside, and Will twirled her around making her giggle.

"Well you sound like a happy girl!" Marlena said, walking up. "Hi Honey." she said, kissing Will on the cheek. "Hey, Arianna." she said bending down brushing a kiss on her forehead.

Arianna threw her arms around Marlena's neck. "Hey." she said simply, hugging her tight.

"What are you two up to today?" she asked. Hugging Arianna to her.

"Daddy and Paul are taking me to the Zoo." Arianna said.

Marlena looked at Will, surprised. "Well." she said, glancing back down at Ari, "That really sounds like a lot of fun."

Ari looked at her, "Wanna come with us?" she asked.

Marlena chuckled. "I wish I could." could she said. "But I have to work."

"Oh, okay." Ari said, accepting the answer easily enough. She skipped away, looking at the flowers planted in the window box.

"So you and Paul are taking Arianna to the zoo together?" she asked.

"Umm yeah, Ari invited him along." Will said.

"Oh I see." she said. "And how are things with you and Paul?"

"Really good." Will said. "We have been out a couple of times. It isn't anything serious, yet."

"Yet?" she asked. "I assume serious is your goal?"

"Well, I really like him, A lot." Will said.

"The feeling is mutual." Paul said, walking up behind him.

Will turned around and smiled at him. "I didn't know you were there." he said.

"I just walked up." Paul said. "I just took a chance that you were talking about me."

Will shook his head. "Nope, sorry to disappoint but…" he said his eyes dancing with amusement... "We were actually talking about Ryan Reynolds."

"Oh!" Paul said, "In that case, maybe just forget I said anything." he said, feigning embarrassment.

"Oh you two." Marlena said. "You guys have fun today." she said.

She turned to walk away, but Arianna ran up and hugged her legs. "Bye." she said.

"Bye honey, you have a great time at the zoo today." she said.

"Ready to go sweetheart?" Will asked, holding his hand out to her.

She tucked her hand in his and held the other out to Paul. When he took her other hand, she looked at Will, "I'm ready." she said.

They had been walking around the zoo for a couple of hours, they had seen the monkeys, the tigers, and the lions, even the rhino and hippo. They had just had a quick lunch of chicken nuggets and fries and were heading out to see the rest.

When they rounded the corner and Ari said the sign for the Giraffe enclosure she squealed with glee. "Giraffe, giraffe.." she called clapping happily. Will smiled at the memories that brought back. Arianna had always loved the zoo and the giraffe had always been her favorite.

"Okay Okay." Will said when she tugged his hand excitedly.

They walked toward the enclosure, passing a snow cone cart on the way. They got there and Arianna ran to the railing and watched in awe.

Will sat down on the bench to watch her, and Paul sat down beside him. They watched in silence for a while until Arianna wandered over and scrambled into Will's lap. "Snow cone." she said pointing over to the cart.

Will looked over, there was a pretty long line. "Maybe later." he said. "The line is really long."

"But I am thirsty now." she pouted.

"I got it." Paul said, "What flavor do you want princess?" he asked.

"Strawberry." she said.

"Will, do you want one?" Paul asked.

"Sure, blue raspberry." he said.

"I'll be back," Paul said looking over his shoulder. "Shouldn't be more than an hour." he teased.

Paul got up and walked away. Will watched him go, then he hugged Ari closer and stroked her hair. The memories washing over him made him upset that he had missed even a minute of her growing up. How many times had she been to the zoo and done this very same thing without him? How many fun times had he missed out on in her life? He swallowed the lump in his throat and whispered to her, "Having fun today?" he asked.

"Best time ever." she said, looking at him briefly before back toward the giraffes. She watched them for a while before she looked at him again. "I haven't haven't been to the zoo in a long time." she said surprising him.

"Mommy didn't bring you?" Will asked. That thought made him even sadder, that she had been kept from a place that she obviously loved so much.

"One time she did." Ari answered.

"What about Daddy Sonny?" he asked.

Ari shook her head no..

"Well Daddy will bring you anytime you want." Will said. "I promise."

"Mkay." Ari said. "I like the giraffe's." she said.

You always have." Will said. "I remember the first time you saw them, it was so much fun to see your eyes light up." he said.

"Do you remember the first time Mommy and I brought you here?" he asked.

She shook her head no.

"You were about three years old and you ran from one place to the other so fast that mommy and I could barely keep up." Will said. "Until we got right here. When we got here, you stopped and stared for hours, we couldn't get you to move all afternoon. You climbed on the fence and fell down. That's how you got this little bobo, see it?" he asked pointing to a faint scar on her knee.

She looked up at him. "My rafee." she said, as if she suddenly remembered. He had bought her that toy giraffe right after she hurt her knee.

Will smiled, "That's right baby girl, we bought Rafee right over there," Will said motioning to the gift cart that was parked on the opposite side from the Snow cone cart.

"I love Rafee." she said.

"You sure do, or you used to." Will agreed, "You wouldn't leave here without it and for a whole month after the zoo, you wouldn't even take a bath unless he was sitting on the sink."

"I love you daddy." she said laying her head on his shoulder.

"Not as much as I love you baby girl." he said.

"Here we go." Paul said sitting down on the bench beside Will. "I'm sorry it took me so long "

He handed Ari her snow cone and she immediately started eating it. "Yumm." she said.

"Blue raspberry for you." Paul said, passing Will his cup, "And Watermelon for me."

They ate their treats in silence until one of the giraffes made its way toward the fence and Ari shoved her half eaten snow cone back into Paul's hands and bolted off of Will's lap.

She ran to the fence and climbed up on the bottom rail, holding her hand out toward the animal.

Will jumped up following her. "Oh no, baby girl that isn't a good idea." he said, scooping her up in his arms.

"Noo." she whined, squirming. "I want down." she cried.

"Okay, but you can not climb on the fence or put your hands inside the fence." Will said. "I know the giraffes are pretty but they may be dangerous." he scolded.

"Okay." she said, she went over and took her snow cone from Paul and then clamored into his lap, taking Paul by surprise.

They finished their snow cones and threw the cups in the trash. "Where to now?" Will asked, looking down at Arianna.

Arianna grinned and pointed to the souvenir cart. "Can I have a toy?" she asked.

"Ummm, sure, okay." he said allowing her to pull him over. Paul followed them.

Ari looked around and around the cart before she finally settled on an animal playset, one with lots of giraffes, "This one." she said presenting it to him.

Will reached out to take it, but Paul grabbed it instead. "I got this." he said.

"Paul no." Will said, "I didn't bring you along to pay for everything."

Paul shrugged, "It's no sweat." he said. "It isn't like I can't afford it."

"So what?" Will said, reaching for the toy again. "I don't care that you have money. I can pay for the things my own daughter asks for."

Paul smiled. "I know, you don't care, that's not what I meant, I know you can, but please..." he said. "Just let me do this."

"Fine." Will said backing off and letting Paul pay for it.

After they were done, they walked through the swamp area and Ari saw the Alligators and crocodiles, then Ari was ready to go.

They strolled their way back through the zoo to the front. Ari stopped and tugged on Wills hand, can I play in the splash pad?" she asked.

I don't think you need to get all wet." Will said, It is time to go home and besides it is still a little too cold for you to be playing in the water."

"Can I play on the playground then?" she asked, nonplussed.

"Okay." Will said and she took off immediately joining the other kids at the top of the jungle gym.

"Wanna sit?" Paul asked, indicating a bench beside them.

"Oh, yeah." Will said taking a seat. "It's been a awesome day." he said.

"It really has." Paul said, "Thanks for inviting me."

Will grinned at him. "You're welcome."

"Although I guess I should thank Arianna." Paul teased, "she is the one that actually invited me."

"Well I would have." Will said. "But, you know somehow the zoo didn't seem like primo third date material."

"What? Are you kidding?" Paul asked "This is a perfect date."

"So it's official, this is our third date." Will said, he reached over and wrapped his fingers around Paul's.

They watched Ari play, running to and fro chasing the new friends that she had made. Will didnt see how she wasn't dead on her feet. They had made it to the pub for breakfast before 8am, they had gotten to the zoo about 10am and it was getting pretty close to 5pm. It would be getting dark soon.

"Arianna." He called. "We should go."

She came running over. "Five more minutes, please?" she begged.

"No." Will said, "We have to get you home."

"Okay." she said sadly reaching both of her arms up so that he could lift her into his arms.

Will obliged, he picked her up and held her close while Paul grabbed the bag from the bench. Will by passed the main gift shop and walked out the side gate. By the time they made it to the car, Arianna's head was on his shoulder and she was fast asleep.

"Poor thing is worn out." Paul said, opening the car door so that Will could put her in. He buckled her into her booster seat and closed the door.

He pulled Paul to him, "Thanks for everything." he said.

"No thanks are necessary." Paul said wrapping his arms around Will's waist. "I meant it when I said I had a great time today."

"Me too." Will said. He framed Paul's face with his hands and covered his lips. He meant it to be just a soft thank you kiss, but the second Paul parted his lips and sighed into his mouth it became so much more. Will's tongue slipped into his mouth, tracing his teeth, tangling with Paul's tongue exploring every inch of his mouth. His hands left Paul's face and crept around his neck, holding him close.

Paul's hands slid into the back pockets of Will's blue jeans, bringing their hips together. Completely forgetting they were in a very public place, he moved against him.

Paul pushed Will against the car and took control of the kiss, sweeping his tongue inside Will's mouth, repeating Will's actions from earlier. Will groaned loudly, shoving his hands beneath Paul's shirt, toying with the waistband of his pants.

The rude blaring of a car horn had them jumping away from one another. Paul backed up giving Will some room. His face had to be a deep crimson, what was it about Will that made him forget who and where he was. He had never really been one to shy away from public displays of affection, but he also wasn't necessarily what he would call an exhibitionist either.

Will scratched the back of him neck, his cheeks an equally dark shade of crimson. "Umm sorry about that." he said. "I don't know what came over me."

"You weren't alone." Paul said, "But we better go before it happens again and we get thrown out of the zoo parking lot for indecency." he said chuckling.

"Umm yeah, good idea." Will said as they got into the car.


	14. Chapter 14

Paul stepped into his apartment and dropped the keys on the table by the door. He rolled his shoulders and rubbed the back of his neck.

It had been an interesting day to say the least. He had almost forgotten how much he liked spending time with Arianna. She was such a joy to be around, and that was especially true now that Will was back in her life. Her spark for life was back.

Will was soo good with her it was like no time had passed at all, like he hadn't missed a second with her. The way he took care of her today, proved that being a father was just an instinct and not a learned behavior.

He had been having the most amazing day, until he had accidentally, well okay to be truthful, accidentally on purpose, overheard Will's conversation with his daughter at the Giraffe enclosure. His heart had almost stopped when he heard Will sharing a memory with her, the emotion in his voice palpable in his voice. There was no way that anyone had been able to describe that to him in such a way to invoke the emotion he heard.

He was walking back with the snow cones, and he could see that Arianna was curled up in Will's lap, he was softly stroking her hair and whatever he was saying to her, she was listening with rapt attention.

He had almost called out to them until he got close enough to hear the story he was telling her. "Do you remember the first time me and mommy brought you to the zoo?" he had asked her.

Arianna shook her head no, no she didn't remember. But apparently Will did.

"…...The giraffes were your favorite then too. We couldn't get you to leave for hours…. He said. My Rafee! She called excitedly. …..That's right, we bought your Rafee right over there. You wouldn't even take a bath without Rafee on the sink for a month…..do you remember that? "

That wasn't the whole conversation, but those were the highlights that stood out to him. He felt a growing ball of dread in his stomach, weighing him down.

Paul couldn't control the chill that stole down his spine at hearing those words. Had the trip to the zoo brought that back? Was spending time with Ari at the zoo enough to jog his memory? He thought about it for a minute…. No, he didn't think so, not really, there had been other times when he had wondered if Will remembered something. He had dismissed all of those thoughts as paranoid, because that is what he wanted them to be, your basic run of the mill paranoid thoughts. But now he had to consider the alternative.

Did Will have his memory back? Was it possible that he remembered everything? Did he remember his old life, was he just playing games? The longer he thought about it, the more upset he became. How could Will do this, he was just letting his guard down again, allowing himself to have feelings for Will.

His racing thoughts were driving him crazy, snippets of conversations replaying in his mind, this was going to drive him insane. He forced himself to breathe and take an emotional step back. He needed to examine the facts… Will had said he didn't know if he wanted to be the person that he was before. He had made that statement about understanding that Sonny punished him by leaving, before they had gone out on their first date, there had been that night in the park when Sonny had interrupted their night, and then today Will had kissed him like there was no tomorrow in the parking lot at the zoo, they had been well on their way to the point of no return and if that car horn hadn't startled them apart, there is no telling what would have happened tonight after they had dropped Arianna off at Gabi's apartment.

Will had asked if Paul wanted to come in at his door, but he had declined, and Will had seemed more than willing to come to his apartment but he had lied and said he was beat and was just going to go bed early….all of those things told him that Will still wanted to be with him, even if he did have his memory back. And he wanted to be with Will too. He would have to make sure Will knew that in the morning, Will had been visibly confused when he refused to come in when they had gotten home, but for tonight he had actually felt like he needed some alone time, he needed time to sort this out for himself, figure out how he felt about it, and make peace with it.

It was scary, he didn't want to fall for Will only to have it ripped away again. This roller coaster thing he had been doing for the last couple of years was old now, so old...He grabbed a pillow and laid down sideways across the bed… but he also knew the truth, he wasn't sure who he was trying to kid, it wasn't like he hadn't already started falling for Will… hard!

Maybe Will just didn't want anyone to know he had his memory back because of the constant pressure. Will had complained about that time and time again about people pushing him to remember. And Sonny, if he knew Will would get no peace, even Paul was smart enough to know that. So if Will wasn't ready to tell anyone, that was fine. He could tell everyone, or no one, in his own time. There was no one saying that he even needed to know that anyone knew his secret. Paul could keep a secret too!

Will walked into his apartment, closing the door behind him. He was a little confused. He felt like the day had been perfect. It had been beautiful, the conversation had flowed easily enough, and the zoo had been a lot of fun, especially for Arianna. She had ran from exhibit to exhibit leading them here and there just as she always did. Paul had seemed like he had been enjoying himself.

But then he had been pretty quiet on the ride back home. Will had tried to engage him conversation, but he hadn't participated that much. He had even waited in the car while Will dropped Arianna off with Gabi. He said that he was tired. Which could be totally true, or maybe wasn't true at all.

He was almost worried that something was wrong. That maybe Paul had changed his mind about whatever it is they were doing. He had invited Paul in, and he wouldn't come in. He had even offered to go with him to his room, admittedly he may have been a little over eager to continue where they had left off at the zoo. But Paul had been seemingly uninterested. He had kissed Will quickly and mumbled something about being tired and wanting to go to bed early.

So here he was alone in his apartment, feeling the sting of rejection. Though that was being a little bit melodramatic. Paul hadn't rejected him at the car, in fact he had been right there with him, even taking control of things. He remember the rush of desire that flowed through him when Paul had taken over their kiss and shoved him against the car. At that moment he had wanted to go ahead and just strip right there.

Something was bothering… his phone rang startling him out of his thoughts. He pulled it from his pocket and looked at the caller ID, it was Gabi.

"Hey." he said when he answered.

"Hey Will." Gabi said. "Ari is refusing to go do anything without her Rafee.." she said clearly frustrated. "She won't even get in the bath."

"Okay," Will said, "Where is it?"

"I don't know Will." Gabi said. "I haven't seen it in a while. She carried it around everywhere, for a long time after you…I mean while you were gone. But she hasn't played with it in a couple of months and I can't find it."

"Did you look in her toy box?" he asked.

"Yes, I took everything out." Gabi said exasperated

"Okay, well I am on my way then." Will said. "I will come help you look."

"Could you maybe stop at Sonny's on the way, maybe she left it over there." Gabi said.

Will suppressed a groan, seeing Sonny was the last thing he needed tonight. "Sure." he said. "I will be there soon."

He grabbed his keys and walked out the door.

When he got to the Kirakis mansion, he took a deep breath before he got out of the car, and steeled himself for another round of "Do you remember this?"

He went to the door and rang the bell.

Maggie pulled the door open. Her eyes lit up when she saw him on the steps. "Will!" she said "Come in."

"Hi." Will said stepping inside.

"I'm sorry, Sonny isn't home, but he should be here soon, if you want to wait for him." she said. "I was so sorry to hear that things aren't going to work out for you and Sonny."

"Yeah, me too." Will said, "But tonight I actually came for Arinna…." he started.

"I think she is with her mother tonight." Maggie said, interrupting him.

"Yeah, I know." Will said. "What I meant to say is that I came for Arinna's giraffe, it is her favorite stuffed animal, and Gabi thinks she left it here."

"Oh okay!" Maggie said, "You know where her room is, why don't you run on up and check."

"Thanks." Will said. He walked up the stairs.

If he hurried he could check her room, grab the toy, and get the hell out of here before Sonny made it home.

He got to her room and opened the door. It looked like something out of a magazine. Clearly Sonny had tried to make up for being gone with elaborate furniture and gifts, that or someone else had designed this room.

He stepped inside the room and closed the door behind him. He searched around the room and did not find the giraffe, he was about to turn the light off and walk out when he saw something stuck between the head of the mattress and the wall. He went over and sure enough it was down between the bed and the wall. He grabbed it and quickly left the room.

When he got back downstairs, he thought for a minute about just leaving without saying anything but then thought that it would be rude.

He knocked softly on the door to the sitting room and opened it a little. He stuck his head around the door.

Maggie was nowhere to be seen, But Justin and Adrienne were on the couch.

"Great," Will thought to himself. "Why couldn't you just be rude."

"Will, Hi!" Justin said getting up and offering Will his hand. "I haven't had much of a chance to see you since you have been home. How are things going?" he asked.

Will shook his hand, "I know, i feel like I am finally getting settled, finding a new groove sort of. But things have been a little crazy."

"I bet." Justin said. "Looks like you found what you were looking for " he said, motioning to the giraffe in Will's hand. "Maggie told us you were here looking for Ari's favorite toy."

"Oh yeah, Thank God I found it, Gabi said she won't even take a bath without it." Will said.

Adrienne stood up, "That is her favorite." she said."We could barely get her to let it go and when I asked her why she always said because her daddy bought it for her."

Will swallowed thickly, he didn't like to think about what his absence had put his daughter through. Even though it wasn't his fault, he always felt guilty about it. "I should get going." he said. "Gabi is waiting on me."

"Will, wait just a minute." Adrienne said. "I just wanted to say that we really hate that you and Sonny are getting a divorce."

Will steeled himself for the anger that he knew would follow those words, Adriene had always been high strung when it came to Sonny, she never thought he was good enough for her son.

"But I know that none of this is your fault. It is hard to feel something for someone when you don't remember your life with them," she continued, "so what I am trying to say is that no one blames you."

"Oh...umm… thank you for saying that." Will stumbled. "I am not sure Sonny agrees with you though."

"When two people are meant to be together, they usually end up together, so if you two are meant to be, you will find your way back to one another, no matter how far apart you have grown." Adrienne said, looking fondly at Justin. "I truly believe that, so maybe one day when you get your memory back, you and Sonny will find your way back together."

"Thanks again." Will said holding up the stuffed animal, he didn't know what else to say, He couldn't very well say what was on his mind. She probably wouldn't take that very well.

He turned to leave, and was almost out the door, when he remembered his promise to Paul… he cursed himself under his breath again and turned back around.

"By the way…" he said. "I saw online that the Spectator is looking for a journalist."

Adrienne looked up at him surprised. "Yes we are." she said. "You thinking about trying your hand at journalism again?" she asked.

Will nodded. "I thought I may give it another shot." he said. "I hear I was a decent journalist and I have been journaling … so I thought why not."

"Okay!" Adrienne said. "The job is yours come into my office tomorrow and we will discuss your first assignment."

"Wow!" Will said. "Thank you, I promise I won't let you down, see you tomorrow."

"What's going on here?" Sonny asked from behind him.

Will closed his eyes, he knew he should have just made a run for it when he had the chance.

"Will, what are you doing here?" Sonny asked.

Will once again held up the giraffe. "Ari is refusing to do anything without this, so I came to get it for Gabi." he said.

"Oh, I would have brought it over to her." Sonny said.

"I know." Will conceded, but I took her to the zoo today and I had just dropped her off and I guess Gabi thought I had it." Will said rambling.

"Oh, okay." Sonny said. "Guess you better hurry then, Ari can get really fussy when she is stuck on wanting one thing."

"Yeah, thanks." Will said.

"Just so there are no secrets here…" Adrienne said. "I just gave Will a job."

Sonny looked at her surprised. "You did?" he asked, the shock evident in his voice.

Adrienne nodded, "He is going to be working for the spectator, he wants try his hand at writing again."

"Oh." Sonny said. He looked back at Will studying him, "Well congratulations, I know you were stressing about finding a job since you moved out of Marlena's."

"Thanks." Will said, just as his phone pinged saying he had a new text message. He pulled the phone from his pocket, and glanced at the message, "Will WHERE are you?" he held the phone up, "That's Gabi looking for me, I have to go." he said.

"Good night Will." Sonny said.

"Night." Will repeated, opening the door and making his escape into the night.


	15. Chapter 15

Paul woke up late after his restless night. He looked at the clock on the nightstand. It was well after 10am. It had been a long time since he slept past 7am. But to be fair he hadn't slept much at all the night before.

He threw the cover back and sat up on the side of the bed. He picked up his phone to see if he had any messages or texts, there were none.

Not that he could blame Will for not calling or texting. Ever since the zoo, he knew he had been distant. He hadn't meant to be, but he was nervous. The morning after the zoo he had texted Will and told him that the day with him and Ari had been perfect the day before and that he was sorry that he had ended their night early. Will had seemed okay with that, he had even said that they had plenty of time.

So this week he really should have attempted to see him, to at least hang out, but he was working on a new case for Black patch, his dad and Steve needed his help, so him saying he was busy hadn't been just an excuse. But he could have made time to see Will if he had really tried. He was just still trying to adjust to the fact that he knew Will had his memory, and figure out how he was going to keep that a secret.

They had texted every day and Will was busily working on something that he had said was a surprise. He had asked repeatedly but Will had maintained silence saying he wanted to tell him in person.

Well today Will would get that chance… Paul decided standing up and heading to the bathroom, he showered quickly and then dressed carefully.

"Are you busy right now?" he texted to Will.

"Nothing that can't wait, What's up?" Will asked almost immediately.

"Let's go get lunch." Paul texted back.

"Deal….meet you downstairs in 15?" Will answered.

"Make it 5, I miss you." Paul said adding a winking smiley.

"Umm, I kinda need to shower." Will texted back.

"Fine, but hurry." Paul said, adding a pouty face.

There was no answer to that message. Paul hoped that it meant Will was already in the shower.

He went to the bathroom and brushed his teeth, and doubled checked his hair. When he found it to his liking he picked up his keys and pocketed his phone.

He walked out of his apartment and went down the hall. He was supposed to meet Will downstairs but he was going to wait outside the door and ride down the elevator with him. Now that he had decided he was ready to see Will, he wanted to see him now.

Just a few short minutes later, Will opened the door and stepped out in the hall closing the door behind him. He was surprised to find Paul leaning against the wall in the hallway.

"Hey!" he said.

"Hey yourself!" Paul said. "You hungry?" he asked. Will was looking exceptionally handsome in dark jeans and a cornflower blue polo shirt.

"I could eat." Will said grinning at him.

They walked down the hall and stepped into the elevator. Paul pressed the button for the ground floor.

Will looked at him and wiggled his eyebrows comically when the doors began to close. "So you missed me?" He teased.

"You have no idea how much." Paul said, reaching out and pulling Will close. He tilted Will's chin up and covered his mouth. Will parted his lips and his tongue tangled with Paul's. Paul's arms went around him just as the elevator dinged and the doors opened. The kiss was over before it ever really got started.

Paul lifted his head and looked into Will's eyes. "Yeah, I missed you too." Will whispered.

Paul smiled "You did huh?" he asked. He kissed him lightly on the lips and stepped back. Paul took Wills hand, threaded their fingers together, and led him out of the elevator.

They walked over to the pub for lunch. When they arrived Paul opened the door for Will, letting him lead the way into the restaurant. They took the table in the corner.

The waitress came over and took their orders. "I will be right back with your drinks." she said. Paul nodded and waved her off.

"So what have you been up to?" Will asked toying with Paul's hand across the table. "You must be working a lot?"

"Yeah, we have had a case we are working on for your Grandma Kate." Paul said.

"Oh, I see." Will said. "Well I am glad that you seem to have a break now." he said.

"Me too." Paul said. "I'm really sorry that I have been kind of MIA this week, I won't let that happen again."

Will shrugged, "I understand you have to work."

"That's not a good enough excuse." Paul said. " So tell me what your big news is."

Will grinned across the table. "I uh.." he started.

"Here you are." the waitress said sitting their drinks down in front of them.

When she was gone again. Paul looked at Will expectantly, waiting patiently.

"I got a job." Will said. "At the spectator."

Paul flashed his a huge smile. "You took my advice?" he asked.

"I did." Will said. "I talked to Adrienne and she hired me right on the spot. "

"See, I told you." Paul said. "I knew you could do it, I never had the slightest doubt."

"Thanks." Will said.

"Seriously I am so proud of you! This just turned into a celebration lunch!" Paul said.

Will ducked his head embarrassed. "Thanks." he said again.

The waitress bounced up to the table again. "Here you go." she said sitting their plates down in front of them.

"Thank you." Paul said.

She nodded, "Of course, can I get you anything else?" she asked.

"No, I think we are good." Paul said, looking across making sure that Will had everything he needed.

They chatted amicably while they ate their lunch. When they were done Paul pushed his plate away and reached across the table for Will's hands."What do you want to do to celebrate?" he asked rubbing his thumbs over Will's knuckles. "Anything… just name it."

"I don't know." Will said, looking at the table top. Finally he took a deep breath and looked up, "We could maybe go back to my place."

Paul searched his face, who in their right mind would turn down an offer like that.. "Yeah, we could do that." he said.

The waitress appeared at the table again, "Would you like dessert?" she asked.

"No, just the check please." Paul said.

She gathered the dishes from the table. "Yes Sir." she said. "I will be right back with that." She turned and hurried off.

It was just a couple minutes before she dropped the check on the corner of the table on her way to another table.

Will reached over to pick it up, and Paul put his hand over it. "I got it."

"Paul!" Will complained, "I have a job now, I think I can pay for lunch."

"So pay for the next one!" Paul said, "This was a celebration lunch in your honor, you are not paying for that."

"Fine then." Will said. "Then I guess, thank you for lunch!"

Paul winked at him and picked up the check, he went to the register and paid the bill. He walked back to the table and dropped some cash onto the table for a tip.

"You ready?" he asked.

Will stood up and placed his hand in Paul's. "You bet." Will's heart was racing, and he had butterflies in his stomach.

They strolled back to the apartment complex hand in hand.

They walked inside the complex and back into the elevator. Will pressed the button for the fourth floor. He was suddenly feeling shy, and nervous. He closed his eyes and took a calming breath. What was that about, it wasn't like he had never had sex before, he had even had sex with Paul before so why all of the first time jitters?

The elevator opened and they walked down the hall to Will's door. Will pulled the key from his pocket and fumbled to get the door open, even dropping the keys once.

Will finally pushed the door open wide and allowed Paul to walk in. He followed him in and closed the door, twisting the deadbolt.

Will turned around and faced Paul, smiling timidly.

Paul smiled back at him. "Well now that you have me here… what are you going to do with me?" he teased, trying to put Will at ease. He reached out and wrapped his fingers around Will's wrist, pulling him close.

Will swallowed, going to him willingly. "I don't know." he whispered, a chill ran down his spine and he shivered involuntarily.

"We don't have to do this." Paul said.

"No, I want to." Will said. "I want you, I'm just nervous."

Paul put his finger under Will's chin and urged him forward, Will obliged, following the unspoken request. "Nothing to be nervous about." Paul said, just before their lips met. Paul kissed his lips softly, he licked across the seam asking for entrance. When Will's lips parted Paul slipped his tongue inside Will's mouth, exploring his mouth slowly.

Will's tongue tentatively met Paul's twisting and tangling with his. His hands crept up around Paul's neck, while Paul's hands landed on his hips, tugging him closer.

Paul broke away, kissing Will's cheek, his jawbone, down to his collarbone, he licked him there teasing his skin. Will allowed his head to loll back, he loosened his arms and let his hands slide down Paul's arms, giving Paul room to work his magic. A moan escaped his lips.

Paul's hands left Will's hips traveling up, he pulled the tail of Will's shirt from the band of his jeans, his fingers tunneled underneath seeking contact with bare skin.

"God Yesss." Will whispered when Paul's hands pushed his shirt further out of the way, his thumbs brushing Will's nipples, toying with them, feeling them harden under his ministrations.

Paul reached up and unbuttoned the two buttons on Will's shirt before he grasped the bottom of the shirt and pulled it over Will's head.

Paul's fingers traced Will's chest, down his stomach tracing the area just above the button of his jeans "Are you sure?" he asked sucking his bottom lip between his teeth.

Will nodded mutely and reached up, making quick work of the buttons on Paul's shirt. He finished them and parted the material, shoving it over Paul's shoulders and down his arms. Finally it floated to the floor and Paul stood before him bare chested. He leaned forward and kissed him, right in the center of him chest, follow a path to the left, flicking his tongue over his nipple. Paul drew in a sharp breath when Will blew cool air across it. He kissed his way to the other side giving the other nipple the same treatment.

Paul's hand went to Will's head sinking into his hair, holding his head in place. "Yess Will."

Paul pulled Will's head up kissing him deeply, his tongue plunging into the deepest recesses of his mouth. Somehow he maneuvered them around to where Will's knees were against the bed. Paul pushed him backwards, until he lay back on the bed.

Paul crawled over him. His fingers went to the button of his jeans, "Last chance Will, are you sure?"

Will nodded frantically. "Yes, I'm very sure." he reached up and grabbed Paul's shoulder, he pulled him down on top of him. He wrapped his leg around Paul's holding him close.

Paul kissed the space between his neck and his shoulder, nibbling HIs skin there. Will's fingers dug into his back, his hips moved rubbing himself against Paul.

Paul reached down, holding Wills hips still. "Whoa, slow down." he whispered against Will's ear. "We have plenty of time."

Will whimpered, flexing his hips again.

Paul's tongue traced the shell of Will's ear, biting on the lobe. "Hmmmm." he hummed in his ear. "You taste so good."

Will rubbed his face against Paul's. His hands went exploring, sliding up Paul's arms, over his shoulders, down his chest. His fingers traced his ribs, down over his abs to the button of his pants, flipping it open he pulled the tab of Paul's zipper down. Will shoved his hands inside, pushing the material out of his way.

Paul chuckled. "You are freaking adorable, do you know that?" he said.

"What?" Will asked. Clearly confused. "What did I do?"

"One second you are all shy and bashful and the next you are bold and confident." Paul said.

"Oops." Will said blushing. His hands covering his face.

"Don't be embarrassed." Paul said. "Like I said it's adorable."

"Shut up." Will said reaching up and tugging Paul's face down for a kiss.

Paul kissed him quickly and then scrambled off the bed.

"Hey." Will whined, reaching for him, snagging his arm trying to pull him back down.

"Wait." Paul said, "I just have to get rid of these." he shoved his pants off, and stepped out of them. Then he picked them up and pulled his wallet from the back pocket. He took out a square wrapper and dropped it on the bedside table.

Will lay back and gazed up at him, clad in only a pair of black boxer briefs, he was even sexier than Will remembered … not that he could tell him that, instead he clamped his mouth shut.

Paul grabbed Will by his feet and pulled his body down the bed until Will's legs were dangling off the end of the bed and he could lean over and trace Will's abs with his tongue. He unbuttoned and unzipped Will's pants and shimmied them down over his hips. He stripped Will's pants from his legs and tossed them on the floor.

Paul started at the inside of his knee and kissed his way up his leg, leaving a trail of fire in his wake. Will was writhing beneath him. His hand twisting in Paul's hair.

An unintelligible string of words falling from his lips. "Shhhh." Paul crooned. "It's okay." he said as he nudged Will's hips up and peeled the underwear off of him.

He pushed Will's hip, encouraging him to scoot back to the center of the bed. When Will was back far enough Paul followed him, crawling up the bed until he was at Will's side. Paul knelt back on his heels, and looked down at Will. He was just as beautiful as Paul remembered, The only difference was in his eyes. His eyes, normally a bright light grayish blue, had darkened to the color of an angry sky. Paul had seen a similar look many times, whether Will realized it or not, his eyes had always been the windows to his soul. In their relationship before, Will had worn a similar look of desire, tainted with guilt. But today, it was different, the guilt was absent and there was a new emotion shining there. Something that he couldn't, no actually that he wouldn't name, not yet.

"You are gorgeous!" Paul said.

Will maneuvered himself up to a sitting position. He reached over and pulled Paul forward, leaning in to kiss him. Paul accepted his kiss, letting Will have the lead.

Will explored his mouth, his tongue stroking Paul's as he leaned forward scrambling onto his lap. Paul leaned back, taking Will with him. He stretched out with Will on top of him.

Will's lips left his and he kissed his chin, his neck, his chest, sliding down further, he traced his ribs and abdomen with his tongue, dipping into his belly button. His tongue swirled in his goody trail following it to the waistband of his briefs.

He glanced up at Paul, silently asking for permission.

Paul grinned and folded his arms behind his head giving Will free reign to do as he pleased.

And just like that Will turned shy again, blushing furiously. But he was determined, he sat back and peeled Paul's underwear from his hips. He worked them all the way down Paul's legs, until he could pull them off and drop them on the floor.

His fingers trailed up the inside of Paul's leg, and then wrapped his fingers around Paul's cock, stroking him firmly.

Paul forced himself to remain still as Will bent over and flicked his tongue across the tip collecting the pre ejaculate that was leaking there. He drew in a sharp breath when Will took him into his mouth, his tongue swirling around the head. Will added suction to the mix and Paul moaned loudly, his hand went to Will's hair, twisting in it, guiding his head up and down.

Paul pulled him away and drug him up so that they were face to face. He rolled over on top of Will, taking his mouth in a deep kiss, tasting himself on Will's tongue.

Will's leg wrapped around Paul's hip. He rocked against him. Paul wrenched his mouth away from Will and sat up on his heels again. He urged Will's legs apart.

"Lube?" he asked.

"Table." Will said pointing to the bedside table.

Paul reached over and grabbed the small bottle from the drawer. He opened it and squirted a liberal amount onto his fingers.

He rubbed it in and brought his fingers to Will's entrance. He pressed one long finger inside of him, stilling when Will hissed against his ear and tensed up.

"Sorry." Paul said.

Will shook his head, "It's okay, it's just been a while." he said.

"It's okay. We can take this as slow as you need to." Paul said. Pushing his own pulsing need aside, willing himself to remain still while Will adjusted to the new sensation.

"More." Will said, taking a deep breath, Relaxing his body.

"You sure?" Paul asked.

Will nodded, moving against Paul's hand.

Paul added another finger working them in and out of Will's body.

Will gnawed on his bottom lip, moving his hips rhythmically.

After a couple minutes, Paul carefully added a third finger, scissoring them apart. Will's mouth fell open. His hips moved of their own volition.

Paul pulled his fingers from Will's body, leaving Will feeling bereft and whimpering.

"Hold on baby…" Paul said. "Just a minute."

He reached over and grabbed the packet he had dropped there. He ripped it open and rolled the condom on, before he squeezed more lube into his hand and stroked himself a couple of times before stretching out over Will again.

"You ready?" Paul asked, saying a silent prayer that he didn't lose it in 5 minutes, like a teenager in the backseat of a car. He could remember every detail of being with Will, every single time they had slept together and he couldn't remember Will ever being that tight.

Will nodded, and put his hands on Paul's biceps, gripping him tightly.

"I'll go slow." he said, kissing him lightly on the lips. He pushed into Will slowly. It took every bit of discipline in his body to keep from burying himself to the hilt with one thrust.

He pulled back and pushed forward again, sinking a little deeper, repeating the action again and again, until finally he was fully immersed in his scalding heat. Will was soo tight, and hot, it was all he could do to keep from losing it right then.

Finally Will's hips began to move and Paul followed his example. He pulled almost all the way out, and then pushed forward. Will's channel was gripping him so tightly, milking him, he had been leaking cum before Will even begin to move. Sweat broke out on his forehead with the supreme effort it took to slow his body down to Will's speed. He tilted his hips, striking Will's prostate with each stroke.

Will cried out, his muscles tightening further, tears coming to his eyes. He was trying to hold out, to give Paul time to catch up to him, but it had been a long time and he was over sensitized. His orgasm was coming, and it was coming fast.

"Paul." he cried, his muscles clamping down on Paul. "I can't. It's too…"

"Let go Will." Paul encouraged, "I am with you." he promised.

Will wrapped his legs around Paul, meeting his thrusts, opening himself up further. Paul bucked his hips wildly until Will screamed as his orgasm ripped through him. Paul felt the evidence of his release between them. He rocked into him through his release, finding his own minutes later, crying out as Will's channel convulsed around him.

He collapsed on top of Will, catching his breath. Holding Will close.

After a few minutes he pulled out of him and rolled them on to their sides. Will opened his eyes and looked at Paul.

"Sorry." he said, pink staining his cheeks.

"What for?" Paul said. "Do you hear any complaining? Because I sure don't."

"I… um no." Will said. "It was perfect."

"Damn right it was." Paul agreed bringing Will's hand to his mouth kissing his palm.

Will closed his eyes and drifted into a light sleep, while Paul just wrapped his arms around Will and held him close. Will's breathing evened out, indicating that he had fallen into a deeper sleep. Paul closed his eyes, if he had any doubts about this thing with Will, they were gone now. He didn't have the faintest feeling of doubt. He had been worried that he was moving on too fast, and he didn't want Will to think he had ever been used. But now he knew the truth, his heart had let go of Sonny long ago, the minute he had been left at the altar.

Will had shown him a different side of himself over the last couple of months. He didn't know if he could ever have been as brave as Will had been. He had left behind everything that he knew, even though it had all been a lie, to come to this town to live with people that he had no memory of. He had stood up to everyone who was trying to tell him how to live his life and went after what he wanted. He had somehow taught Paul about his own self worth. For every time that Sonny had tore him down, Will had built him back up. He was a lot different from the Will that he had known in the past. Paul had thought that he cared for him before, that was nothing compared to what this could lead to. He could already feel the stirrings of what could only be called love deep down in his soul.

He reached down and pulled the cover over them. When Will stirred, twisting in his arms he pulled Will back against his chest tightening his grip around him. Paul buried his face in his neck and breathed in his scent. "Shhh." he whispered. "Let's get some rest." He allowed himself to drift to sleep.


	16. Chapter 16

"How's how's my favorite girl?" Sonny said, picking Arianna up and holding her in his arms.

"Hi daddy." she said happily, throwing her arms around his neck and hugging him close.

"Are you ready to go?" he asked.

"Yes, I just have to get my stuff." Ari said squirming to get down.

Sonny sat her down on the floor and watched her run off to her bedroom.

"Thanks for watching her for me." Gabi said. "Will is going to call you tomorrow to get her and take her for a while, but I don't want to ask him to keep her overnight yet. I think maybe he is still nervous around her."

Sonny nodded, "It's fine, she is my daughter too."

"Of course she is." Gabi said… "That could never be taken from you."

Arianna came bounding back into the room. "Ready!" she announced happily.

Gabi knelt down on the floor. "Come give mama a hug and a kiss." she said. "I'm gonna miss you."

Ari put the backpack down at Sonny's feet and ran over to Gabi giving her a big hug and kiss. "Bye Mommy, be careful on your trip, I love you!." she said.

"Thank you Angel, Mommy will see you in two days… okay?" she asked.

"Okay!." Arianna agreed.

Gabi hugged her one more time. "I love you too, you be good for Daddy Sonny, promise?"

"Promise." Arianna said solemnly. Then she kissed her cheek and picked up her bag. She handed it to Sonny, then held her arms up for Sonny to pick her up as well.

Sonny picked her up and put her on his hip. "Have a safe trip and don't worry, we will be fine, I promise." he said.

"Thanks again." Gabi said.

"Bye." Arianna said waving at Gabi over Sonny's shoulder.

When they made it to the car, Sonny strapped her in her booster seat. "We are gonna have a great time this weekend." he said.

Arianna nodded enthusiastically. "Can I have Ice Cream?" she asked.

"Sure you can after dinner." Sonny said.

"Awe… " she said. "Please."

"Are you trying to get me in trouble with mommy?" He asked.

"Ummm nope." she said. "I just want ice cream."

"Okay okay." Sonny said. "But you can't tell anybody it has to be our secret, okay?"

"Deal!" Ari agreed clapping happily.

Sonny drove them to the mansion and got her out of the car.

"Noo daddy, Ice cream… you promised." she accused folding her little arms across her chest.

"We are going to have ice cream here, I bought your favorite kind." Sonny said lifting her into his arms again.

"Birthday cake?" she asked.

Sonny nodded, "Yep with extra sprinkles."

"Yummy…." she said.

"Go put your bag away in your room and I will make us some." Sonny said putting her down in the foyer.

Sonny chuckled as she tore off up the stairs.

He went into the kitchen and dipped them both some ice cream.

He handed her the bowl when she come bounding into the kitchen. "It's so pretty outside, let's take our ice cream out there."

"Okay." Arianna said around a huge bite of ice cream.

"Arianna Grace." Sonny scolded, "Don't talk with your mouth full."

"Sorry." she said dutifully once she had swallowed her ice cream.

"What do you want to do this weekend?" Sonny asked her. "We could go see a movie, or play in the park, or we could go out to the cabin on the lake and go fishing."

Arianna shook her head. "Ewww no fishing."

"Well what about the zoo?" Sonny said. "You haven't been there in a while right?"

"Daddy and Paul took me to the zoo." Arianna said.

"Oh they did?" Sonny asked, masking his anger. "When did they do that?"

"Last weekend." Arianna said.

"Oh cool… I bet that was fun." Sonny said.

"It was lots of fun." she agreed. "We got to see the Giraffes and the monkeys." she said.

"That's good baby girl." Sonny said. "I am glad you had a nice time with Daddy and Paul."

Sonny got up and ruffled her hair. "Finish your ice cream and then you can go play for a little while before dinner okay?"

"Where are you going daddy?" she asked. "Don't you want to play with me?"

"Daddy will be back soon to play with you, I just have a little work to get done first." Sonny answered absently.

"Okay." she answered accepting his excuse easily enough.

Sonny walked into the house and rang the bell for the house keeper, when she appeared he told her to go out and watch Arianna until she was ready to come inside. When she was outside watching Ari, he went upstairs to his room.

He paced back and forth angrily. He wanted to call Will and demand to know what the hell was going on, but then quickly remembered that he had no business demanding anything from Will. Will was petitioning for a divorce and had made it abundantly clear that he wanted nothing to do with him.

Damn Susan Banks for kidnapping him and screwing with his mind. If it wasn't for his damn amnesia they would be a family right now, Sonny was sure of it. But he had already pushed him too far too fast. Calling him and demanding anything from him now would not win him any brownie points with Will.

He had to get a handle on his emotions. Sure he had told Will he knew that he wanted the divorce so he could be with Paul, but he had wanted so badly for Will to deny it, to say that it wasn't true. But he hadn't done that at all, all he had done was stand there and look guilty. Well, at least Will wasn't cheating on him this time. He guessed there was a silver lining. How had this situation gotten so far out of his control?

The day Ben Weston had busted in the church and uttered the words "Will is alive..." it had somehow simultaneously become the best and worst day of his life. He had been about to marry Paul, who was his first love, he had loved him for so long that he couldn't remember not loving him. But WILL was alive.. or possibly alive and suddenly nothing else mattered. There was a chance to go back and right the wrong, and he had wanted it. Then when they had found Will, it had solidified it in his mind. He and Will had to get back together, they had to find a way to make whatever had gone wrong with their lives right again.

He hadn't wanted to hurt Paul, so he had let him go. That was the noble thing to do right? Let him go? So he had done that, begrudgingly, and still Will wanted nothing to do with him. Instead Will wanted Paul...and Paul wanted Will, or so it seemed. So how did he, the person in the middle suddenly become the person on the outside? The whole situation made no sense to him.

There was a knock on his door. "Sonny." Adrienne called through the door. "Are you okay?"

"You can come in Mom." he called.

"Sonny, what's wrong?" she said opening the door. "Arianna is outside with the housekeeper and you have been up here nearly two hours. She keeps asking when you are coming down to play with her."

"I didn't realize I had been up here so long." Sonny said. "I am just so angry."

"What happened?" she asked.

"Ari said Will and Paul took her to the zoo last weekend." Sonny said, sitting down on the foot of the bed.

"Ah, Honey, it is natural for you to be upset about that." She said. "It is going to take time for those natural instincts to tell you to stop caring."

"I am never going to stop caring mom." Sonny said, "he is my husband."

"Soon to be Ex Husband." she reminded him. "Honey I know it hurts, but he doesn't remember you or your life together…. And you are going to have to let him go, let him live his life with whoever he wants to be with. And hopefully one day his memory will return and you will have a chance to be together again, if that is what you both want." she sat beside him and pulled him into her arms hugging him.

"How am I supposed to be okay with My soon to be EX husband and My ex fiance being together?" he asked.

"The same way you were okay with being with Paul, after you found out he was the person Will cheated with." she said. "You just deal with it one day at a time, and one day you will find that things that once hurt you soo badly, don't really matter at all anymore."

Sonny smiled, "Thanks Mom." he said. "You're pretty smart."

"Oh Honey, I have been through a lot more than you could ever imagine and I have learned a few things over the years." she said. "Now come on, let's go play with Arianna she is asking to have a tea party."

"You go ahead, I will be right down." Sonny said standing with her.

She left the room and he went into the bathroom. He splashed some cold water on his face and plastered on a smile, before joining them in the formal dining room for the tea party.

Arianna was dressed in her dress up clothes and plastic high heels, looking much like a formal princess when he joined them at the table. "Forgive me," He said. "It appears that I am a bit under dressed."

Arianna giggled at the silly face he made. "That's okay daddy." she said. "So is Gramma." she said looking pointedly at Adrienne.

"My apologies as well your highness" Adrienne said chuckling.

They continued on with their tea party until the housekeeper popped her head in and asked if she might set the table for dinner. Then they scurried away to give her room to work.

After dinner, a very long bubble bath and three bedtime stories Arianna snuggled down under her cover to go to sleep.

Sonny tucked the cover in around her. "Goodnight Princess." He said. "Do you know how much I love you?"

She held her fingers up, about an inch apart. "This much." she said.

"No silly more than that." he said.

She spread her fingers a little wider. "Like that?" she asked.

"Nope more than that too." he said, tickling her side.

She threw her arms open wide. "As wide as the whole world?" she asked.

"Well more than that too…. But that is a good start." Sonny said. "Good night baby."

Ari closed her eyes but they popped right back open. "My Raffee, my Raffee, I can't go to sleep without Raffee."

"Okay hold on, he is around here somewhere." Sonny said. "I saw you put him in the bag and bring him with you." He got up and went over to her backpack. He unzipped the front compartment and pulled the giraffe out. "See." he said holding it up. "I got it."

He handed it to her and she hugged it close. "Thank you daddy." she said.

"You know I think you got Raffee at the Zoo." Sonny said, sitting back down on her bed.

"Mommy and Daddy bought it for me." Arianna said.

"Yeah they did." Sonny agreed. "Daddy Sonny missed that day because he had to work.

"I know." she said. "It was my first time at the zoo, Daddy bought me Raffee because the Giraffes were my favorite." she said proudly.

"Wow!" Sonny said. "I can't believe you remembered that. You were so little."

"Daddy told me." she said.

"Daddy told you what?" Sonny asked.

"Daddy told me about buying me Raffee because it was my favorite animal." she said innocently.

"Oh." Sonny said perplexed. "What else did Daddy say?"

"He said I wouldn't wouldn't leave the giraffes for hours." she said.

"Oooh!" Sonny said. "Because they were your favorite?"

"Yep!" she agreed. "Daddy said so, and he said that is where I got my bobo on my knee," she said pulling her leg up, pointing to the tiny scar there. "Daddy said I climbed on the fence and fell down."

"That's right you did. Did daddy say anything else?" he asked.

She was quiet for a minute. Then her eyes lit up. "He said that I wouldn't take a bath without Rafee." she said. "And that's all."

"Well goodnight Princess." he said. "Sleep tight, don't let the bedbugs bite."

"Goodnight Daddy." she said sleepily, before she closed her eyes.

Sonny sat there watching her for a few minutes. His mind was racing with possibilities.

Maybe Paul told Will all of that stuff, no, he wouldn't have a clue about any of that. Paul hadn't hadn't even been in Salem way back then. Besides why would he tell Will anything that would help him get his memory back. Once he had his memory back, it would be over with Will and Paul knew that. Didn't he?

Gabi must have told Will all of that stuff, trying to help him remember, that was the only thing that made sense. Sonny was sure that was what happened. When Will mentioned that he was taking Arianna to the zoo, Gabi gave him some details of Arianna's first visit there, or maybe even Will had asked about the zoo and how often they took her.

Once he was sure she was asleep he got up and turned the nightlight next to her bed on and crept out of the room, turning off the overhead light and closing the door behind him.

Sonny went to his own room just down the hall and turned on the baby monitor that he kept in her room, not that she was a baby anymore, but sometimes she had nightmares. Then he went to the shower.

After he had worked on paperwork from the office for a couple of hours, trying to calm his tumultuous thoughts he stuffed it all back in his briefcase and got into bed. A good night's sleep was what he needed.

He tossed and turned, back and forth for over an hour before he sat up in disgust. He looked at his phone. It was just after midnight. He wasn't going to get any sleep until he knew the truth.

He found Gabi's name in his contacts, and pressed call. It rang several times before going to her voicemail. Sonny swore under his breath. He ended the call and immediately dialed again.

"Sonny, what's wrong? Is Arianna okay?" Gabi said when she answered. Sonny could tell she had been asleep. Damn it of course she would think something was wrong.

"No,no, she is fine." he rushed to assure her. "Arianna is sleeping."

"Then what's wrong? Why are you calling so late?" she asked confused.

"I wanted to ask you something about Will." Sonny said, suddenly feeling like an idiot for even calling.

"Will?" Gabi said, the panic returning to her voice, "is Will okay?"

"Yes he's fine, I mean I guess he is fine." Sonny said. "Did you tell him about taking Arainna to the zoo and buying her that giraffe because that was her favorite animal?" he rushed out.

"Sonny what are you talking about?" she asked. "Will took her to the zoo last weekend."

"I know." Sonny said, "But before he did, did you tell him about Arianna first trip to the zoo, how she got that scar on her knee, the giraffes being her favorite, that she wouldn't take a bath without her giraffe, any of that?"

"No." she said. "I didn't even know he was taking her to the zoo till he brought her home and dropped her off that night."

And then suddenly it hit him…. It all made sense….

"I have to go." he said. "Sorry for waking you up, I will see you in a couple of days."

"Sonny...what…." she started, but he was already hanging up.

"Fuck!" he shouted out into the empty room. Will had his fucking memory back, but for how long…. A week? A month? The whole fucking time?

He jerked his pants on and shoved his arms through the sleeves of the shirt he had discarded earlier. Will was going to tell him the truth once and for all.

He grabbed the baby monitor and stumbled down the hall. He knocked on Justin and Adrienne's door. When his mom came to the door he shoved the monitor into her hand. "Listen for Ari, I have to go out." he said turning to walk away.

"At this hour? What's wrong?" wrong she asked.

"I will explain later, but I have to do this right now." Sonny said, walking away.


	17. Chapter 17

Will opened his eyes and shifted slightly, Paul was nestled up behind him, arm thrown over his stomach,chin against his shoulder. Will could feel his breath on the back of his neck. He sighed, he was blissfully happy and also deliciously sore in all the right places. He wanted to see Paul's face so he moved carefully to turn over, trying not to wake him, but Paul groaned and tugged him ever closer. "Where do you think you're going?." he growled sleepily.

Will giggled and twisted around in his embrace until he was facing Paul and propped himself up on his elbow. His hand traced down Paul's muscled arm. He leaned in and kissed him gently on the lips, on his cheek, and then on the tip of his nose. "Nowhere." he whispered. "I just wanted to watch you sleep."

Paul's eyes fluttered open. "Hi!" he said softly.

"Hey." Will answered back. "Sleep good?" he asked.

"Like a baby." Paul said. "I guess you wore me out."

"Hey!" Will said indignantly. "I seem to recall you having a hand in that third round." he teased.

Paul grinned, tightening his arm around Will, "Wellllll" He drawled, "Can I help it if we have a lot of making up to do?" he asked.

"Yes, we do, don't we?" Will agreed, "But we have plenty of time, I'm not going anywhere."

"Hmmm, is that a promise?" Paul asked, grinning like a complete idiot.

Will nodded. "Definitely." he said snuggling closer.

"Good." Paul said, rolling onto his back and pulling Will over on top of him. His hands guided Will's head down to his and he captured his lips in a kiss.

Will kissed him thoroughly, before he pulled back and propped himself up on his elbows. "I'm starving." he said.

Paul gave him a flirtatious grin. "Me too." he said sliding his hands under the covers, down Will's back until they were resting on the globes of his ass. He massaged his backside.

"For food you Perv." Will said laughing, but unable to resist grinding his hips down into Paul anyway.

"Will, we just ate." Paul said indignantly.

"What?" Will cried, "Those gross stale chips could barely be called a snack…. I need real food. You know it's nearly it's nearly midnight and we haven't really eaten since lunch."

"Will, those were your stale chips." Paul pointed out. "And it isn't like we haven't been busy." he continued, his fingers absently tracing random patterns into the small of Will's back under the covers, lazily rocking his hips up into Will's.

"Ummmhmmmm we have." Will agreed, licking his lips at the memories of all the things Paul had done to him and vice versa in the last several hours, "And I have loved every second of it." he said, pressing kisses to Paul's chest, "But I am like literally going to starve if you don't feed me."

"Fine." Paul said pouting. "I guess, let's go get something to eat then."

"Everything is closed remember, It is almost midnight." Will said. "But you can make me pancakes."

"Pancakes?" Paul said laughing "Pancakes for dinner?"

"Sure, why not?" Will said shrugging one shoulder. " I have all the stuff to make them, and I like them, especially when they have chocolate chips and whipped cream."

"Well….. you should be making them for me." Paul teased, "But since I like taking care of you I will make them!" Paul said. "But only if you share."

"Deal." Will said enthusiastically.

Paul rolled them over, and pressed a hard kiss to Will's lips. "I will be right back, don't move." he said.

Paul sat up on the side of the bed, picked his underwear up out of the floor, and slipped them on. Then he went over to the small kitchen, actually it was more like a tiny corner of the room, but he could make it work.

He rummaged through Will's cabinet until he found the few things that he needed to make the requested pancakes, he poured all the ingredients into a bowl. Then he hummed quietly to himself while he whipped the batter with a whisk and warmed the griddle.

Will was content to prop himself up against the headboard and watch him work. Paul looked good in his kitchen, cooking for him in his underwear. It was cute to see Paul humming to himself, his hips swaying as he poured the batter on the hot griddle. He could very well get used to this.

Paul made a generous stack of pancakes and put them on a plate, making sure to put butter between each layer. Then he squeezed some syrup over the top and grabbed the can of whipped cream from the fridge.

He sauntered back over to the bed with a saucy grin. He climbed onto the side of the bed and sat down in front of Will. "Dinner is served." he teased presenting the plate to Will.

"Wow!" Will said taking the plate from Paul's outstretched hand. "You're fast."

Paul chuckled and handed the plate over. "Well, You're starving right?" he asked. Will nodded mutely, and Paul grinned at him. "I aim to please." he said as he opened the whipped cream and swirled a ridiculous amount onto the top of the already ooey gooey pancakes.

Will didn't waste any time. He cut them with the fork and shoved a huge bite into his mouth. "Mmmmmmmmmm" he moaned in appreciation, his eyes closing in pleasure. "Oh My God, you have no idea how good this is." Will said when he could talk again.

He scooped a bite onto his fork and held it out to Paul. Paul couldn't resist taking the bite from him even though it was a sticky mess. He closed his mouth around the food and chewed, then he licked his lips trying to collect the extra syrup. He looked at Will, his eyes twinkling then nodded. "I have to admit that's pretty good." he agreed.

"Paul seriously?" Will said. "This cannot be the first time you have ever had chocolate chip pancakes, please say it isn't true."

"Fraid so." Paul said. "But to be fair, I have had wheat flour pancakes with honey before."

"Ewww." Will said, scrunching his nose in disgust... "That doesn't even sound good, why would you want to eat that?" he giggled.

"Hey!" Paul said, his eyes twinkling. "Keeping an athlete's body in shape requires discipline, and a strict diet."

"Ahhh ok." Will said. "Well don't worry, I happen to think your body is mighty fine…" he said saucily, looking him up and down while licking his lips. "But if you're worried about staying in shape, I will be more than glad to help you work off all of these extra calories." he teased.

"Well thank you." Paul said taking the bite, Will offered him. "I will gladly take you up on your offer, it is very helpful, you know since the gym is closed now and all."

Will shoveled another bite into his own mouth, smiling like he had just won the lottery.

Paul lounged back on his elbow and watched Will eat with gusto. He had no idea where Will put it all, but he seemed to have no such issues, he ate until the plate had been cleared, except for a few errant ribbons of syrup.

When Will was done, Paul reached out for the plate. Will handed it to him and Paul was about to get up and take it back to the sink when Will grabbed the can of whipped cream from him.

"Guess you never did this either huh?" Will asked, his eyes dancing merrily. He tipped his head back, and opened his mouth and sprayed some whipped cream directly into his mouth. "Mmmmmmm." he said.

Paul shook his head, "Nope never." he said chuckling. "You are such a dork."

"Maybe!" Will agreed, "But you are sooo missing out." he said raising up on his knees,and crawling toward Paul, he leaned over him, "Come on, open up." he coached.

Will squealed with glee when Paul followed his instruction and opened his mouth. He sprayed the whipped cream into his mouth.

"Yummm." Paul said. "I think that's even better than the pancakes."

"I know." Will said, his eyes taking on a mischievous glint, he snook the can and pushed Paul backwards... "I wonder what it would taste like on you…"

"Whoa whoa whoa " Paul said scrambling away from him, getting to his feet. "Oh no you don't, Mister."

"No?" Will pouted, lowering the can, batting his eyes at Paul.

"Nooo." Paul agreed. "Although that does sound very interesting, we will be all sticky, and have to change the sheets, and shower…. Again, and I have to be up early for a meeting, remember?"

"Fine.. another time then." Will said handing the can over to Paul, and crossing his arms over his chest. He pouted like a spoiled child, as Paul made his way back to the kitchen..

Paul put the plate in the small sink and the can of whipped cream back in the fridge. "Awe don't pout." he said. "What's wrong, Babe?" he asked.

"You're spoiling all my fun." Will answered.

"You, Will Horton, are incorrigible and insatiable." Paul said sauntering back to the bed. He stood at the end with his hands on his hips. "What am I ever gonna do with you?"

Will waggled gos eyebrows comically, "WHATEVER YOU WANT!" he said.

Paul shook his head, making a clicking noise with his tongue… "And you called me a perv… Just like I said you are insatiable."

"That's totally not my fault." Will said.

"Oh it isn't, huh, Let me guess, it's my fault?" Paul teased.

Will crawled to the edge of the bed on his hands and knees. Then he sat up and threw his arms around Paul's neck. "Ummhmm," he agreed, "All your fault." he said before he covered Paul's mouth flicking his tongue inside, and tangling with Paul's kissing him wildly.

Will slid backwards, tugging Paul with him. One hand hands twisted in Paul's hair, the other sliding down Paul's back. Paul crawled onto the bed, and drug Will down to the bed. He rolled Will underneath him, only breaking their kiss when they had to come up for air.

Will's legs immediately came around his hips, he rubbed himself against Paul. "Yesssss." he moaned in Paul's ear when Paul rocked against him. "Naked…. Now" he ordered, pushing at Paul's boxers.

"WILL." There was a loud banging on the door. "WILL, I have to talk to you." Sonny called through the door. "RIGHT NOW!" He said, still banging.

"What the hell is he doing here?" Will groaned out loud. He was irritated as hell, what the fuck could Sonny possibly want in the middle of the night?. "OH my God, Ari." he said, the color draining from his face as he suddenly realized that since it was the middle of the night and he should be worried that something was wrong.

Paul scrambled off of him, allowing him to sit up. This had better be good, he thought. Sonny shouldn't be banging on Will's door like that at almost, he looked at the clock, 1:30 in the morning.… was he trying to scare him to death?

"Just a minute, I'm coming." Will called, when Sonny kept beating. He stood up and snagged his jeans from the floor, pulling them on, for-going the underwear in his rush to get the door open.

Paul stood and pulled his own pants on, while Will went over and jerked the door open.

"Sonny, Oh My God, Is Ari okay?" Will asked immediately as he opened the door enough that Sonny could be seen.

Sonny pushed the door open further and barged in. He turned back to face Will, "Huh?" he asked. The question going completely over his head.

"Ari?" Will said, looking at him expectantly.

Sonny looked at him as if he were crazy. "What about her?" he asked confused.

"Is she alright?" Will asked, exasperation lacing his voice.

"Oh yeah, she's fine, she is at the mansion with my mom and dad." Sonny answered absently.

"Then what are you doing here Sonny?" Will asked.

Sonny looked at him, really looked at him, he knew Will well enough to recognize the glint of desire still lingering in his eyes. He was half naked and wearing jeans, Will wouldn't be wearing jeans to bed. He whirled around and looked at the bed, clearly it had been slept in, among other things. Finally he noticed Paul for the first time, standing on the opposite side of the bed, also half naked.

He narrowed his eyes at him and opened his mouth, swore under his breath and then then threw his hands up. "You know what, forget it, I don't even know why I am here." he snarled.

Will sighed… of course Sonny would act like he was doing something wrong. Some things never changed right? He was always to blame. "Well, You are here now, and you may as well say what's on your mind, you know get it off of your chest." he said. "Obviously whatever it is it bothered you enough that you got out of your bed, got dressed, left our daughter with your parents in the middle of the night, and came over here to bang on my door at an ungodly hour." he stressed.

"Okay, you wanna know what my problem is? " Sonny said. "Fine, I will tell you exactly what my problem is.." he ranted. "My problem is that I want to know exactly how long you have had your memory back?" he lashed out.

Will blinked a couple of times. He would have never guessed that was what was bothering Sonny, not in a million years. His mind whirling, racing with possibilities, what was he supposed to say to that? He had been trying his best not to lie, not outright lie anyway, but there probably wasn't a way to not do that here.

"Sonny." he said. "Obviously you are upset about something, but I don't..."

Sonny's eyes widened, "Don't you dare insult my intelligence right now." He ground out. "I know the truth okay? You must think I am pretty stupid."

Will's eyes flew to Paul's. Paul stood with his arms crossed over his chest, his face looked as if it were set in stone. He couldn't tell what Paul was thinking. All he could think about was that this wasn't the way he had wanted Paul to find out that he had his memory back. He would have eventually told him, at least he would like to think that he would have. Finding out like this was probably humiliating to him.

"Will… for the love of God say something." Sonny shouted, drawing Will's eyes back to him.

Will closed his eyes, gathering his strength, things were over with Sonny regardless, but he had to make this right with Paul. The only way to do that was to tell him the truth…. The whole truth, And he would just as soon as he dealt with Sonny.

"Paul." Will whispered. He waiting until Paul shifted his gaze from Sonny to meet his eyes. "Can you give us a few minutes?" he asked, praying that Paul would understand.

Paul nodded numbly. "Sure." he said moving toward the door. He didn't trust himself to say too much.

"Oh no." Sonny said stepping in his path, blocking his exit. He pushed the door closed. "I think he should stay, that way he can hear about all the lies you have been telling, don't you?"

Will rubbed his hands down over his face, "Fine, yeah okay..." he said. "You win, if this is how it has to be, then so be it." He looked Sonny in his eyes, "If you must know the truth, I was only trying to spare your feelings."

"What kind of bullshit answer is that?" Sonny asked, anger making his voice shaky and menacing. "How are you going to turn your lies and manipulations into something that was done for my benefit? When clearly it was all an effort to get Paul back into bed with you."

"No, it' wasn't about that at all… it's simply the truth." Will said. "I thought if I still had amnesia, it wouldn't hurt you so bad when I didn't want to be married to you anymore and maybe, just maybe you would take the hint and leave me alone… let me live my own life."

"Oh, so all of this, this whole little scheme, all of your lies, were to protect me and my feelings." Sonny screeched. He took a step toward Will, throwing his hands up in frustration…."Oh well if that's all it was, then that makes everything fucking fantastic, there's no hard feelings." he sneered. "You make me sick, both of you!" Sonny said turning to Paul, "You know what you

two deserve each other."

Will took a deep breath, he had had just about all he was willing to take from Sonny. He didn't really care what Sonny said to him but he was not going to let Paul take the blame for any of this. "Look, why don't you leave him out of this." Will said. "This is about me… and I didn't lie to you, not really." Will said. "You literally never asked me if I had my memory back. You just kept forcing your memories on me. Trying to rewrite history to fit into your fantasy of what our life was."

"That's a technicality, Lies by omission, are still fucking lies, Will." Sonny hollered.

"What about your lies?" Will hollered right back, his anger really starting to get the better of him. "You did everything you could to make me believe that we lived in paradise, and our entire life was nothing short of perfection when that couldn't have been farther from the truth. In fact I am pretty damn sure that when I supposedly died… you hated me."

Sonny paled at those words, "I never hated you Will… Yes, I was hurt and angry but I never stopped loving you, not for one second."

"How was I supposed to know that? You left town, you wouldn't take my calls. I begged, I pleaded, I apologized… I took the blame for everything, even though you know damn well that it wasn't all my fault." Will said, horrified to realize that he was crying, hating the hot tears that coursed down his face, yet unable to control them, to make them stop.

"Will." Sonny took a step toward him, " Please, I love you."

Will stepped back holding out his hands to ward him off, to protect himself. "No, damn you." he said. "It's too damn late to love me now."

Sonny stopped and held his hands up in surrender… he glanced over at Paul, suddenly aware that he was being too quiet. Looking at him he didn't even seem upset, didn't seem like he was properly surprised or shocked at all…. "Well, don't you have anything to say?" he snapped at him. "The way I remember it you never were one who liked to be made a fool of? Has that changed?"

Paul looked at Sonny, he remained silent chewing on his bottom lip. He wasn't sure Will was going to understand his reasons for what he was about to do…. But he felt like it was the right thing. He really didn't want to leave Will alone with Sonny, but Will needed some privacy to say whatever was on his mind without worrying about how he would react. It was the only way for him to get the closure that he needed.

Finally Paul cleared his throat and walked toward Will he stopped a couple of feet in front of him. "Will, I think I am going to give you two some privacy." Paul said. "I am going back to my apartment."

"Paul, no." Will said, reaching out for him. "Stay with me, I don't want…"

Paul closed the gap between them, he framed Will's face with his palms, "Shh Will, It's okay, you need this." He said. "If you want, you can come to my apartment when you are done here."

"I don't, I don't need this." Will denied. "I only need you. I need you to stay with me…. To understand why."

Paul smiled. "And I need you." he said. "But trust me, you do need this space, to get the closure that you and Sonny both need."

Paul kissed him lightly on the lips and walked to the door. He pulled the door open and then stopped and turned back..."For the record." Paul said, looking at Sonny. "I have known he had his memory back for a while now, but I was waiting until he was ready to tell me. I felt like he deserved the right to tell me, or you, or whoever the hell he wanted to know in his own time and in his own way. "

Sonny stared dumbfounded at the door as it closed behind Paul. Then he turned back to Will.

"Why, Will?" Sonny said. "I don't understand. I need to know why you did this? Help me understand."

Will shook his head. "You were all pressuring me. Everyone was pressuring me whether they meant to or not. I couldn't be the person you all wanted me to be, it felt wrong to me, like I was living a lie. Don't you understand that yes, I have my memories back, but the time I spent being 'EJ' changed me… I am not the Will that you knew before, I am not the person you fell in love with."

"Will, you are my husband. You, and me, and Arianna, we are a family." Sonny said. "Don't you remember what that felt like?"

Will wiped his hand over his face. "Honestly?" he asked. Sonny nodded silently and he continued. "Yeah I do remember what that felt like, and it didn't feel very good to me, at least not in the end."

"Okay." Sonny said, "So things weren't perfect. But if it hadn't been for Ben Weston, we could have worked things out."

Will shook his head sadly. "Don't you see, it was over, even way back then." he said. "The day that I was strangled, I left you one last voicemail, and I told myself then, that was the last one I would ever leave. I GAVE UP SONNY! You were gone, you never gave me one sliver of hope for us… not one glimmer to hold on to. I was hurt and angry too, but I reached out to you dozens and dozens of times, I begged you for another chance. But you weren't interested in giving second chances, you blamed it all on me, all of our problems were my fault, at least in your eyes…"

"I didn't mean…" Sonny started.

"No…. Let me finish." Will said, wiping his nose with the back of his hand, feeling like a petulant child, but he had to get it out… he wanted this to be over. "You never took any responsibility for anything. But it doesn't matter, not now, not anymore. I am so sorry that I lied to you again, I am so sorry that you are hurting, but the truth is, I am not in love with you anymore."

"Because you are in love with Paul?" Sonny asked, tears trickling down his face.

Will sighed, "No." he said. "God… haven't you been listening?" he said, his voice laced with frustration, "This has nothing to do with Paul, and everything to do with you and me and everything that has happened between us." he ran his hand through his hair, "I don't know what is going to happen with Paul, but whatever it is, has nothing to do with my decision to ask for a divorce."

"But you wanted a divorce because, you wanted to be with him." Sonny accused, all the fight leaving him.

"Yes and no." Will said honestly, "I didn't want to cheat on you again, but more than that, I didn't want to let you go on believing I would change my mind, when I knew that wasn't going to happen."

"Are you sure Will, I can wait."Sonny said. "I can give you space, if this is what you need you can explore this thing with Paul."

"No Sonny." Will said. "Just stop… okay…. I am sure….It's over."

Sonny looked at him defeated. "Just for argument's sake, tell me when you got your memory back." He asked..

"The day Ben strangled me again…" Will said.

"That's a long time to lie to everyone Will." he said as he turned and wrenched the door open. "I sure hope they all understand why you did it, because I sure as hell don't."


	18. Chapter 18

Will stared at the door as it slammed closed behind Sonny. He closed his eyes, and took a couple of deep breaths trying to get his emotions under control. He felt like he was on an emotional roller coaster and he was pretty sure that he wasn't supposed to feel like this. Especially since he had no feelings for Sonny beyond friendship, well when he wasn't being a pushy asshole anyway. He had been shocked at the amount of anger and resentment that he felt toward Sonny. It all just bubbled to the surface when Sonny had said he had been angry and hurt but had never stopped loving him. Where was his lame ass profession of love when it could have made a difference? Sonny should realize that anything he could say now was just too damn little, too damn late. The time that he should have said something was when he had been calling him twice a day, leaving messages, begging for a second chance. Why did he want to dredge that up now… now when Will had moved on.

Sonny had been so angry that Will knew that there was nothing that he would be able to say to Sonny to make him realize that not telling him that he had his memory back, really had been meant as an act of kindness. Sonny had smothered him, pushed him soo hard, shoving so many memories at him every single day… that he really had just thought it was best to just let Sonny believe that he had no memories of his past. That way Sonny would be less hurt somehow when he said he was done. Will was never going to change his mind, he knew that without a doubt. And well, yeah Sonny may never forgive him for that, and he was okay with that, it was a risk he had been willing to take. Eventually Sonny would get over it, and move on with his own life. Paul was his main focus and the only one that he was concerned about, he had to find a way to make things right with Paul.

He went into the bathroom and splashed some cold water on his face, washing away the tear stains.. "Come on Will, get it together." he said, giving himself a little pep talk. "whatever it takes to fix this… is what we have to do " Then he walked out and opened the door to the apartment, he felt a little silly but he stuck his head around the corner and peered out down the hall. He had half expected Sonny to be waiting in the hallway to argue or plead some more., but the hall was deserted and he was more than grateful for that. He just wanted to concentrate on Paul. He counted his blessings that at least Paul wasn't angry with him, or he hadn't seemed angry anyway. Even though he had every right to be. He walked down the hall and stopped in front of Paul's door.

He knocked on the door, nervously shifting his weight from one foot to the other. It was taking a couple of minutes for Paul to open the door. "Come on, come on, come on." Will whispered, the fear was growing rapidly, beginning to feel like lead in the bottom of his stomach. When Paul finally swung the door open, he looked like he was as upset as Will felt.

For some inexplicable reason, Will was overcome with emotion all over again at the site of him. He threw himself into Paul's arms, the sobs and tears coming unbidden. He was mortified all over again, what the hell was wrong with him tonight?

"Hey, hey hey..." Paul said, immediately wrapping Will in his arms, cradling him to his chest, comforting him. "I've got you, you're okay, It's okay." he crooned over and over.

"I'm sorry." Will sobbed. It was embarrassing, and completely senseless, but he couldn't seem to reel it in, no matter how hard he tried.

"Shh, shh, shh, It's okay." Paul said, as if he were trying to calm a small child, doing and saying all the same things that Will had said and done for Arianna when she was upset or unconsolable. Paul held him closer as he walked them backwards a couple of steps. He kept moving until he was able to reach out and push the door closed with his foot. Then he stood perfectly still in the middle of the room, rubbing circles into Will's back, crooning softly to him, waiting for him to calm him down.

Finally Will quieted and laid his head on Paul's shoulder, hugging him tightly. "I'm so sorry." he whispered brokenly. "I can't tell you how sorry I am."

"Come on baby, let's sit down." he said as he led Will over to the bed, he sat down and pulled Will down beside him. Once seated he pulled his leg up on the bed and turned to face Will, "Maybe you should tell me what are you apologizing for?" he said confused.

"Our perfect night got ruined, I've been lying to you, I am crying like a two year old, … take your pick." Will said, wiping more tears from his eyes. "That's more than enough reasons to owe you an apology.

"First of all, you don't owe me anything., and nothing got ruined." Paul said. "I think we had a pretty damn good night, at least it was for me." Will opened his mouth to speak and Paul laid his finger over his lips. "I'm not finished." he said before he grinned at Will. "Technically you didn't lie to me, I knew you had your memory back, and I don't care. And as far as you crying, after what you have just been through? That is just a normal human reaction. To be perfectly honest, if you were completely unaffected, then I would be worried about you right about now.

"Thank you!" Will said, reaching out and taking one of Paul's hands in his own. He gave him a watery smile as he wiped more tears from his eyes with his free hand. "I don't understand where this all keeps coming from." he said self consciously. "It isn't like I want to be with him or anything." he said.

"You don't have to want to be with someone to experience anger and pain from a past relationship." Paul said. "The way that things ended with you two, there was no closure for you, even if you did ask for a divorce, you didn't have the opportunity to really to tell him why you wanted it, how badly he hurt you… that's why I left you alone with him. It wasn't because I wanted to, or because I was upset with you or the situation. It was just because I wanted you to be able to say whatever you needed to say to him, and I didn't want you to be worried about how I might react to it or even feel about any of it."

"I never thought of it like that." Will said sniffling, "That actually makes a lot of sense… but you still didn't have to leave me."

"Of course it makes perfect sense." Paul said teasingly, "I am smart like that."

Will giggled at that. "Yeah you are." he agreed, "So tell me, since you are soo smart, Mr. Smart guy. Just exactly how did you know I had my memory back?" he asked.

"There were a couple things that you have said over the last few weeks that made me wonder… like the day we almost made love, you said, 'I've missed this so much.', I wondered what exactly you were talking about, you covered pretty well, but it was still in the back of my mind, nagging at me. But, it was really that day we spent at the zoo. I was coming back from getting our snow cones and I heard you telling Arianna about her first trip to the zoo. The way she got that scar and buying her the stuffed giraffe. That's when I knew for sure." Paul said.

Will looked at him, "That's why you wouldn't come in my apartment that night when we got home?" he asked, understanding dawning on him. "Were you angry with me? I knew something was wrong when we got home."

"No, not angry." Paul said. "But I thought maybe you and Sonny would get back together."

Will looked at him with wide eyes. "That kiss in the parking lot, didn't clue you in that I wanted you?" he teased. "I mean, I thought it was pretty hot, I seem to remember wanting to pull you into the car and rip your clothes off and have my way with you right there."

Paul chuckled, "I would have been up for that, if we hadn't had your daughter in the back seat." he said.

"So you really thought I was going to run back to Sonny just because I had my memory back?" Will asked, needing to know.

Paul shrugged, "I was worried, yeah." he said.

"Didn't you stop to think that I would remember every minute of that last horrifying year." Will said. "Why would I ever want to go back to that? Especially after being with someone like you? How could I?"

Paul shrugged again. "Life has a way of throwing curveballs sometimes. It was a difficult couple of days for me, I was just starting to open myself up to you, just starting to have feelings for you again, and I didn't want to lose you, but I was scared that was exactly what was going to happen."

"So you knew that I have my memory back, and that I have been lying, even if it is by omission, and you don't hate me?" he asked amazed.

Paul's head snapped up and he looked at him like he had lost his mind. "Hate you Will?" he asked dumbfounded? "I could never hate you, haven't you figured that out by now?"

"Wait, you have feelings for me?" Will asked, his overstressed brain finally catching up to where they actually were in the conversation.

Paul giggled, "Will…. You are so oblivious sometimes." he said. "Since you don't seem to be getting it, let me spell it out for you, yes you could say that I have feelings for you, I kind of love you!"

"You love me?" Will asked dazed.

"Yes, Captain Clueless, I love you!" Paul said, grinning from ear to ear.

Will launched himself at Paul, forcing him back on the bed. He straddled him and covered his faces with kisses… "That's awesome because I kind of love you back!" Will repeated his declaration to him.

He was the happiest he had been in months, maybe even in years. In the back of his mind Will knew that there was probably going to be an ugly fall out from all of this mess he had created. A lot of people would probably be disappointed with him. Sonny was so angry, maybe angrier that he had ever seen him, and he was probably going to tell everyone that he came into contact with, but he couldn't be worried about that right now. All he cared about right now was that Paul loved him.

"You do huh?" Paul said. "That's the best news I have heard all day!" he said hooking his leg over Will and flipping them over.

"Oh." Will said, surprised. Paul took Will's hands and pinned them to the bed above his head. Then he captured Will's lips kissing him deeply. He ground his hips down into Will's.

Will moaned loudly, squirming underneath him, his legs coming up around Paul's hips, as he moved against him frantically, seeking contact with him.

Will ripped his lips away from Paul's gasping for breath, undeterred Paul's lips went to work on Will's neck, his teeth sinking into his skin, nipping him, then soothing the pain away with his tongue.

"Yes!" Will hissed. He twisted his wrists, until Paul let go. His hands went to Paul's shoulders, his face, his back, touching him everywhere he could. "Clothes…..off…." he said. "Now."

Paul sat up, moving off of Will, he stood beside the bed and stripped his pants off. "Anybody ever tell you how bossy you are?" he asked, as he reached for the buttons on Will's pants, undoing them and tugging them off of his hips.

"But you love me anyway!" Will quipped.

"Yes I do!" Paul said as he crawled back on the bed, and starting at Will's ankle he kissed and licked his way up his leg, the inside of his thigh. Will threw his head back, his fingers twisting in the sheet beside him.

He wrapped his hand around Will's cock and licked the head, teasing him with his tongue. Will's hips came up off the bed. "Fuck." he cried.

Paul grinned and took him into his mouth, his tongue swirling around him. He took Will as far as he could to the back of his throat, applying suction as he drew back up, he tasted the pre cum on his tongue, he repeated his movements...

"Paul." Will moaned after a couple of minutes...grabbing his shoulders, pulling him away. "Wait." he said. His chest heaving. "I'm gonna cum." he said.

Paul's eyes danced with humor. "That's the point!" he said teasingly.

"I know, but I want... " Will said hesitating for a minute… he didn't know why he felt so bashful sometimes... "You know, I want you… to touch you and to..."

"Oh!" Paul said, looking into Will's eyes, suddenly understanding what Will wanted… "Yeah! Okay." he said, hurriedly scrambling up onto the bed beside him. He lay down on his back and put his hands behind his head. "I am all yours." he said.

Will blushed and sat up, he loved it when Paul let him do whatever he pleased… He trailed his fingers over Paul's abdomen, tracing all the valleys and dips. He bent down and followed his fingers with his lips, and tongue. He got to his belly button and swirled his tongue inside.

Paul's sharp intake of breath, make him smile. Knowing that Paul was so responsive to him, that he could make him feel good, was the best aphrodisiac he could ask for. He kissed his way up his stomach and the center of his chest straying left, licking and grazing his nipple, teasing him with his tongue, finding his way to the other side, giving that nipple the same attention.

Paul, groaned and shivered underneath him, but otherwise remained still.

Will stretched across the bed reaching for the bedside table… if he knew Paul, supplies wouldn't be very far away… he pulled it open and closed his hand around a bottle of lube. He tossed it on the bed and felt around in the drawer looking for a condom. He fingers finally wrapped grazed the corner of a square packet. "Whew." he said. "I was getting worried there for a second." he teased, pulling it out of the drawer and holding it up.

"Umm yeah, I haven't really bought any recently. I haven't had any use for them till now." Paul said.

Will leaned down and kissed him soundly on the lips. "You definitely have a reason now." he said wiggling his eyebrows. He maneuvered himself between Paul's legs and sat back in his heels. Then he grabbed the lube and flipped the cap open, and squeezed some out onto his fingers.

He brought his fingers to Paul's entrance. Will caressed him, teasing him, circling round and round before pressing inside, one at a time, slowly.

Paul had his legs up, his heels digging into the bed. His bottom lip tucked between his teeth. He grunted when Will added a third finger. He couldn't keep from pressing down onto Will's fingers, forcing them deeper.

"Will…" Paul gasped when Will's fingers brushed his prostate. "Now… please." he said, trembling under Will's touch.

Will removed his fingers and ripped open the foil packet. He rolled the condom on quickly, then grabbed the bottle of lube and drizzled a generous amount over himself. He stroked himself a couple of times, spreading the silky liquid down his length. Will Squeezed his eyes closed tightly, fighting down his urge to cum.

He wasn't aware he was being watched until Paul let out a guttural moan. Will opened his eyes to find Paul raised up on his elbows, staring at him openly. "Fuck Will!" he said "That is so fucking hot, but I really need for you to get over here…. Now." he teased.

Will's hand stilled and he blushed furiously. "Soo impatient." he said as he rose to his knees and slid his hands down Paul's legs, grabbing his hips. He pressed himself against Paul's channel, pushing in inch by inch.

Paul grabbed his knees pulling them up, surging up to meet Will, until Will was fully buried inside of him. He wrapped his legs around Will's hips, and moved with him. Will rocked into him over and over, adjusting his movement to make sure he was at the perfect angle to graze Paul's prostate with each stroke. Will bit down on his bottom lip, Sweat beading on his forehead. He did his best to ignore the tell tale signs of his impending orgasm.

Paul gripped his shoulders, his fingers biting into Will's skin leaving perfect fingerprint bruises. "Yessss…. WILL…..Sooo close." he ground out. "Soo soo close. Don't fucking stop."

Will kept going pushing them both higher and higher. He felt Paul's body tense below him. His muscles clamped down on Will, making it harder for him to move… drawing him ever closer to the edge of his control.

Paul's hand wrapped around his own cock, stroking himself in time with Will's movements, quickly thrusting himself over the edge of the cliff, screaming out Will's name as he lost control, covering them both with his seed.

"Aaaaaahhhhhhh" Will groaned loudly, following Paul, emptying himself into the condom, still moving until he was completely spent. He finally let go of his hips, and collapsed on top of Paul.

He laid his head against Paul's shoulder, struggling to catch his breath. When he was finally able to formulate a sentence, he turned his head toward Paul and kissed his cheek. "Did I mention I love you?" he asked.

Paul chuckled. "I think that is how this all got started." he said. He trailed his fingers up and down Will's back slowly.

"Hmmm." Will kissed his lips, his cheek bones, his eyes, his chin…. "You're right." he said. "Who knew those three little innocent words could elicit such a response?"

"Not me." Paul said, "But in that case you better get used to hearing it 24/7."

"Mmmmm" Will said, sliding out of him and sitting up. "I can live with that." he said getting rid of the condom and walking into the bathroom, he cleaned up quickly and took a warm washcloth back yo the bed, cleaning Paul's stomach and chest.

Once he was done he dropped it beside the bed and climbed in bed behind Paul. "I am exhausted." he said, sighing as he cuddled as close to Paul as he could get.

Paul turned over to his side and pulled Will in his arms. "It's been an eventful night." he said kissing his temple. "Go to sleep babe." He rubbed slow circles into Will's back until he relaxed against him in sleep. Then he closed his own eyes…

His last coherent thought before sleep claimed him was "I can't believe he loves me!"

A/N: This brings part one of this story to a close. There is at least a two chapter epilogue coming... maybe more, it could turn into a part two. This story ending makes me feel a little sad.


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